To want to move to the country and live in a village?

[Ohnoredundo]

We are really quite settled in the 'burbs. Have a lovely house, friends and family close by and good schools nearby. Also have a lovely community that we're quite well integrated with. BUT I have a weird obsession with moving to the country and living in a village. It's all Cath Kidston's fault I believe...

Would be interested in hearing from people who've lived in both suburbs and villages. Am I over romanticising village life and is it a case of the grass always being greener and me being an ungrateful wench?

I grew up in a village near a small town. Both DH and I had long commutes to school and knew few people in our area.

I know I hated it - rarely saw school pals outside school, had to get my dad to pick me up from the occasional movie night etc.

We now live in a lovely area on the edge of a city, as kids get older I am loving the idea for them of 10-min bus into town to meet friends and go shopping.

I would never life in a village with my kids. Or for myself really - driving to get the paper and a pint of milk? No thanks. But maybe that's just my prejudices

BTW my kids play out late (DS1 was out till gone 8pm tonight) and we have birds and butterflies in the garden too.

We have a compromise by living in a very small market town - but is the size of a large village. We moved here from the suburbs of a large town a few years ago and it was the best thing we did. I'm really happy here, feel very settled and doubt I'll ever leave this place.

As a market town, its slightly larger than just a small village and we've got more amenities - shop, butchers, post office, pub, few tourist shops and the like. But its enough to have its own cubs and brownies groups, exercise class for the grown ups and so on..

But its still small enough that when I pop to the shops, I know several people and we have a quick chat etc etc...

The thing I love most though is that my children have that freedom that I could never give them in the town. There just wasn't the culture of going out to play there, and the school was set over such a wide catchment area that DDs friends never lived close by and so she had no one to go out and play with. Now, she's got a hit list of about 8 / 10 children, so she can usually find someone home . Quite often, during the holidays she goes out to play and doesn't come home until tea. She hangs out with her little gaggle of friends as they move from house to house, to the park and so on... This to me, is worth its weight in gold. After a couple of years of living here, DD still sometimes says to me 'we're really lucky to live here'.

But as she turns into a teenager, it is slightly bigger than a small village with more children around and a bit more to do... We're also on the bus route into town... so they won't be so remote when they're teenagers.

I grew up just outside of Brum and was city girl through and through with fantasies of village life not dissimilar to those of Miss Read.

12 years later I live in a village, semi rural and about 4 miles from a small city. And I love it. We have a stream in the garden (with ducks) 3 pubs (where they welcome you by name) good shops (small) including a butcher (who gives you extra meat for being local NOT a euphemism I should add!) flower shop, pharmacy, doctors and a little tea shop where they've known my ds since he was 10 days old, Local school and reasonable (ish) bus service.

I wouldn't want to be more rural if I'm honest - I like to be near civilisation too much. But whilst we have a regular high street there aren't designer shops or big theatres/arenas so if you want those its not for you, or you need to be prepared to travel (saying that we get lots of smaller warmup gigs - we're off to see Michael mccintyre soon and seen Damon albans Gorrializ (?sp dh is sloshed!) in the past)

I think if you move from a big city there are compromises to be made - for me, well my family followed me here and my dad has never been happier.

Grew up in a village. It was lovely in some ways but I would never choose it myself. Apparently there was an active partner-swapping scene (it was the 70s) which put another perspective on the apple-cheeked choristers singing carols/harvest festival antics/lovely cottage gardens bit. I think my dad would have liked to be involved, and was either boffing /harassing/rubbing thighs at several women in the village. Perfick!

Been there, done that, moved back to a larger city.

It looks idyllic but its boring after a while.

Also, there are usually very few services in the villages, you have to drive quite a while for anything you want, and there is very little for teenage kids to do so be prepared to do a lot of ferrying.

On the other hand they are hotbeds of alcohol and adultery, so the gossip is always entertaining :o

We live in the sticks a village.

It's gorgeous - seconds away from beautiful countryside. Our garden is full of wildlife.

But- we have no shop, pub or anything. It's 1.5 miles to nearest corner shop.

I wouldn't live in the 'burbs though. Our kids have a pretty idyllic time imo. The pros outweigh the cons.

I have lived in the big smoke all my life and ever since I've had dcs have wanted to move out. However over the past 15 years city life has changed enormously. London has become cleaner and calmer, with decent comprehensible bus services and soon to be trains with free wifi. The parks have been tidied up and there are shiny new playgrounds everywhere. There are a few pockets of sleazinesss but they are getting fewer and fewer.

So when I was ready to cut and run, I am now reluctant. In the meantime I have dcs who get the best of both worlds, we use Youth Hostels to get that rural immersion. The London schools are miles better than when I was in them and I believe they have the best teachers, even if they don't have the best league tables.

And they do drama clubs, I do book club and adult education, there is work, it's all too easy I suppose. So now I will have to wait until they are grown up to make a go of it.

I think as your dc is still tiny it's a good time to move out, but look at it as a 5 year stint perhaps rather than a lifetime change.

Think very carefully!

I love my neighbours (we have lots of social stuff going on) but the nothingness and the distance from shoe shops for eg really gets to me.

We are very rural (outside a hamlet) and my dd3 attends a lovely school, but it is limiting. Think carefully. I'm nearly 50 and crave busy streets and arty stuff. Or Hugh Grant....

I've found many people who live in villages rather dull to talk to. What happened down at the pub is the talk of the town for weeks kind of thing. Nothing personal, but I couldn't live in such a small world. Maybe it's for you.

Yes goingmad I could so do with living out my old age in a nice little flat in Bloomsbury. Sod pottering about in the garden.

You are over-romanticising. Like suburbs, there's villages and there's villages. I live in a village and am a SAHM - I drive 20,000 miles a year just getting to school and shops. I'd rather spend the diesel money on holidays, and the time on doing other things. My friends live in other villages/towns so one of us always has to drive (no such things as taxis round here, at least, they exist but they never work out/available, and no public transport), so no chance of a glass or two of vino together. Harder getting babysitters. We have no school. But we do have a garage, thank goodness, most important necessity! And swings.

On the upside - much more aware of the cycle of the seasons, great for dog-walking, and fewer noisy neighbours, bigger gardens.

Aribura that's a good point - the conversation is fairly limiting and you have to be overly cautious in case you offend anyone. At least in the city you can always find people that you do get on with to substitute those you might fall out with.

Well, in my village, everyone doesn't know your business. And the pub isn't the centre of it, nor is the conversation limiting at all - can be far more so with city-dwellers, just depends how they spend their life. Most village-dwellers work in various different towns and cities around us, and in fact there is as much if not more diversity than living in a burb. When I lived in a suburb of Reading, everyone I met was pretty middle class. Not so in my village life. Nor in my suburban life in Southampton. No one rule fits all situations.

Have found though, that everyone is related to everyone... have to be careful who you slag off (best not to ;-)).

Well, in my village, everyone doesn't know your business.

nah, you're just not in the know

Have found though, that everyone is related to everyone... have to be careful who you slag off (best not to ;-)).

Or shagging each other. Be very careful :o

You should be fine as long as you're not the patronising kind of townie who thinks they're special because they used to live in London!

Whatme
Oh so true, and Young Farmers, oh my....