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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To wonder how ordinary people afford home schooling?

79 replies

toptramp · 01/12/2011 16:55

I do have respect for people who home school. It is not for me principally because I cannot afford not to work and also I love my job too much to jack in in. I wouldn't like to work at home.

Do homeschoolers rely on a working partner, working at home, benefits or charities to fund their home schooling.

For all those who work from home- how do you balence it with schooling your kids?

OP posts:

lljkk · 01/12/2011 17:44

To be brutally blunt, I think you have to not get fed up of your own kids, or to have relatives who take them off your hands sometimes, or flexi-time work schedule(s).

I know a great many people who home-school and none are close to well-off, many are far below the poverty line, even. Yet produce very clever, confident, capable children. Very admirable & impressive, even though HE not for me & I have many doubts about it.

Threat to HE is one of my top current mutterings to stroppy 10yo DD.

pigletmania · 01/12/2011 17:47

DD because of her SN can be thoroughly exhausting (more so because of pg) and its so lovely to drop her off to school and come back and put my feet up. It was strike day yesterday and dd was driving me insane with her meltdowns, and demanding, she is surprisingly good at school, but as I said kids can react to different people and environments.

WhoopsyLa · 01/12/2011 17:50

Cant see why you never asked this on the very active HS area here.... would suggest that many people who HS live frugally and are often adept at making money trhough creative means...ebay, etsy and writing springs to mind.

mewantcookiesmenocanwait · 01/12/2011 17:56

We home ed. My DP works more-or-less full-time conventional hours; I work evenings and weekends from home. No real difference to when the kids were tiny.

We generally get the school rates for theatre trips/museums etc (especially if part of a home ed group), and many activities (ice skating, horse riding etc) have super-cheap rates for home ed groups because the venues would otherwise be empty during school hours. But I only mention these because someone upthread said you wouldn't get the cheap prices schools get. TBH, those costs are fairly irrelevant compared to lost income, and, if you can work from home, that becomes easier as the kids get older and a bit more independent.

birdsofshoreandsea · 01/12/2011 17:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

callmemrs · 01/12/2011 17:59

I agree- considering you are likely to need one parent not working, or only working very part time, for many years, its a luxury beyond the reach of many. I know some people are at the other extreme, and cant afford to work when the children are very small because they don't earn enough to cover childcare, but once they are school age, even a low paid job will make a profit as childcare hours are vastly fewer. So yes, you must have to be in the position of knowing one parent doesn't need to earn in the long term which is a rare luxury nowadays . Wouldn't be my choice though, personally

birdsofshoreandsea · 01/12/2011 18:00

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

msbaublestwinkle · 01/12/2011 18:11

Joining in the laughing at 'not getting fed up of your kids' of course we do! Well, I do anyway

My DC do also eat lunch and wear clothes. Well, they wear clothes sometimes.

I get my breaks from them when they are spending hours engaged in slightly mysterious games with their friends, or when they are busy at Home ed group.

Original poster

toptramp · 01/12/2011 18:29

Hi I was badly bullied at school so if dd was i would he. I'm not sure about it otherwise; i can see why parents shun the comp; large class sizes etc but i can also see what he kids miss out on. both have good points ime.

OP posts:

GloriaTheHighlyFlavouredLady · 01/12/2011 18:29

Working is expensive. At one point I worked out that I spent well over 50% of my after tax income on working.

Work clothes, coffee, peak rate activities, not able to shop at markets, no time to go to charity shops, having to pay extra for MOT etc as just need it done rather than shop around etc.

And the major one-travel.

Our loss of income is not that great now I can shop around and shop more cheaply and mend clothes etc.

PomBearAtTheGatesOfDoom · 01/12/2011 18:45

It might be interesting to see how the good old "north/south divide" thing figures in the decision to HE or not. We live in the north east, so one of us working full time for low wages (we were better off than just 3% of the population on that website last week) is still just enough that we don't both have to go to work. Probably just as well as I am just disabled/useless enough to be functionally unemployable but not disabled enough to claim anything for it and we would be up shit creek without a paddle if DHs wages weren't enough. We sink a wee bit further behind every month, but just about manage to keep going and are very lucky to actually have the choice that a lot of people in the south just don't seem to be able to make. That's one of the biggest shames there is in this country now - parents have to both go to work full time just to pay the cost of living.

SDeuchars · 01/12/2011 18:49

I've been HEing DCs for 15+ years (depending on when you start counting). I've also been the major breadwinner for all that time (and supported xH for the first 11 years). I am fortunate in that I do an "office" job where I could work from home and then go freelance. This meant I could work early mornings, late evenings and overnight if I needed to (and weekends once H was x).

According to www.ifs.org.uk/wheredoyoufitin/, we have a higher income than about 11-13% of the population. Like the other EHEers here, the biggest expenses were on my DCs education (from about when they got into double figures). I choose not to run a car (we are in a town with good buses and cycle routes), we cook from scratch and do not do shopping as a pastime. BTW, this is not a moan - we do not consider ourselves poor and we can afford to do the things we want (we choose not to want to drive a smart car or go on expensive holidays).

Once DC2 is completely independent, I look forward to getting back time for my leisure (if I can remember how to do it!). I won't be wasting it earning too much more... Once you get used to living on a low income, you tend not to think about it - you do mostly cheap stuff automatically.

MrsZoidberg · 01/12/2011 19:00

I started HEing 2 years ago as DS badly bullied and now has health issues due to it. He is 14, coming up 15.

I work from home running DH's business. DS helps and is learning business skills, finance skills, etc. We (as in DS & I not DH) also set up an Ebay shop so DS is learning economics, maths skills, English and IT. We work all day, but if you were to ask him, he would say we do a couple of hours each morning as that is when we concentrate on school work! I wonder if he would enjoy himself so much if he knew he was learning all day .

helendigestives · 01/12/2011 19:12

My Dad home educated me. He is not fit for work - has agoraphobia and anxiety - but had no problems caring for his own children. We lived on benefits and whatever type of child support it was that Mum paid us. (I was young; I don't know what their financial arrangement was, sorry.)

alysonpeaches · 01/12/2011 19:20

I am always taken aback when I meet someone who home schools. They must have the patience of a saint besides very deep pockets.

lljkk · 01/12/2011 19:42

SDeuchars said: "I've also been the major breadwinner for all that time "

but how... I mean, how do you work with DC at home all the time? Dc bother me or each other seemingly constantly. I can't concentrate knowing they could and will interrupt at any moment. I can't achieve anything that requires real thinking when they are at home. Rarely or maybe never.
DC are age almost 4 -11, btw, so not a bunch of toddlers.
But no way could I get real work done with them at home. Posting on MN when they're at home already exceeds my limits (as evidenced by abundant typos).

usingapseudonym · 01/12/2011 20:25

I'd love to homeschool but sadly there is no way we could afford it either :(

I'm at home at the moment as I can't afford childcare, but once children are at school I will have to work :(

ScarlettIsWalking · 01/12/2011 20:31

I would LOVE to homeschool, wish I had the guts to take the plunge

raspberryroop · 01/12/2011 21:17

I Home school one, flexi school my middle DS and have 7 yr old in full time school.

I personally work from home and run a couple of small businesses. The oldest that I HE helps in the business may be 2 days a week , ie IT skills, Maths, accounting, businesses studies, social skills, negotiating skills, photography, stock control - etc - He can also study independently a lot of the time and he has tutors for Higher maths and dyslexia and Art. It is surprising what you can learn from real life ;)

The days I flexi school my 9 yr old - I work in the early morning or eve as he needs full on attention and dyslexia work that I set for him based a lot on information from MN members.

I drive an old car and we holiday cheaply - its just a choice as many have said the same as being a SAHM or people who privately educate.

raspberryroop · 01/12/2011 21:22

lljkk - its surprising how quickly children can learn to study independently given a chance and not being spoon fed information or doing worksheets. They read books, look stuff up on the net and just follow their natural curiosity.

usingapseudonym · 01/12/2011 21:43

I agree its a choice like being a SAHM or privately educating - but both of htose things are also things a lot of people can't afford to do!

FridgeRaider · 01/12/2011 21:52

I home educated as a single parent when DD was younger - up until she started high school in year 7. I was on benefits at the time and we managed, just as any single parent of schooled children on benefits manages.
You can indeed go on educational trips as cheaply as the schools if you hook up with other local home educators. It's an educational group, therefore educational group discount.
I don't have an educational background, but managed easily to facilitate my DD's learning, from year 3 up to year 7. There are books, libraries, museums and the internet, I probably learned (or re-learned) as much as she did throughout that time.
It was a wonderful experience. She grew so much in confidence and learned so much about life.
I'd do it again in a heartbeat, no question.

Cherriesarelovely · 01/12/2011 21:55

This is such an interesting thread. Those that HE, do you have a sort of strict schedule/timetable? Do you find it hard to keep your Dcs motivated?

raspberryroop · 01/12/2011 21:59

usingapseudonym - I think a lot of people could chose to do it if they wanted to live less materialistically or in jobs that gave them more flexibility/ from home or part time etc. Lots of people are SAHM for quite a long time if they have a few kids.

But saying that I think schools are pretty good for most kids so its not worth the ''sacrifices'' for most people

raspberryroop · 01/12/2011 22:01

Cherriesarelovely - lots of different types of HE. Some really just do ''school'' at home, some are totally autonomous and go with the flow of the child.

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