to think that things in your supermarket trolley aren't yours until you have paid for them

[jandymaccomesback]

This morning in Tesco we kept passing a womanwith a child in a trolley. We first saw her in fruit and veg, as she peeled a banana and handed it to the child. Next time we saw her the child was eating from a packet of cheese strings. Finally we saw her opening a carton of juice. All of these things came off the shelf. DH was so enraged he wanted to tell the staff, but I persuaded him not to. To me this is wrong, even if you intend to pay,and definitely gives a message to the child that she can help herslf. AIBU?

[DesperatelySeekingSedatives]

YANBU

If you haven't paid for it then it's theft.I've worked in several shops where people have been given a lifetime ban for munching stock and then not paying for it.

[OnEdge]

When I was pregnant, I found that milk alleviated my nausea instantly. I walked into Tesco, grabbed a carton of milk and opened it and started drinking it where I stood. Understandably people were quite At the time, I really didn't care, but I cringe now when I look back and picture myself I did go on to pay for it, but its still shocking behaviour.

The bananas was naughty because you have to weigh them, but stuff with a bar code is ok. From a child's point of view it must be torment being taken round a shop of yummy things but not allowed to have any. I let mine have stuff and scan it at the end.

@ mrsscoob

[WhoKnowsWhereTheTimeGoes]

I was in a queue at the checkout once and the man in front of me was eating a banana from the bunch in his shopping. I wondered what the cashier would say. When she put his shopping through, she weighed the bananas, then broke one off and weighed that one separately. So he did pay for it.

I don't do it, and don't allow my DCs to do it, I don't allow them to eat in shops full stop as that is how I was brought up, but can't get particularly worked up about it. You eat food in a cafe before paying for it after all.

[rhondajean]

There really isnt a problem with this, as long as you pay for the lot before you leave. I dont do it often but have from, time to time, and if DH comes with me and I get a baton loaf, Im lucky if half of it makes it to the till.

Anything thats prepacked is fair game, and I am certain that its only theft if you attempt to leave the shop without paying. Thats why shoplifters get stopped on the way out and not when they get seen stuffing things up their jumper isnt it?

You can buy bananas in a pre pack btw, where they are paid for by the pack.

It might be a bit uncouth, but its not illegal, and not really anyone else's business except the shop is it?

[OriginalGhoster]

YANBU I have never seen or heard of anyone doing this. I would have thought it was illegal before I started reading this. Surely children or adults can refrain from eating when they're buying food? The human body is designed to cope with long periods of not eating, that's what stored glycogen and fat is for.

The longest shops I do take 45mins, so I just don't get it. Give your dc a snack at snack time and meals at meal times. They need to know that shopping is when you buy the food, not when you eat it. It's called delayed gratification and it is an important thing to learn when you're growing up.

[notabankersmum]

OriginalGhoster you've put it so much better, but that's exactly what I meant to say (bar if you're diabetic or have other such circumstances).

I honestly think our DCs would be a fucking nightmare if I started letting them snack at the supermarket - it's not worth the pain in the long run!

[VivaLeBeaver]

Yabu.

They'd have paid for the juice and the cheese strings when they got to the till. And if they do what I do I tell the cashier to weigh a banana twice to make up for eaten one.

Your dh sounds like he has bad anger management problems. The staff would have thought he was a loon if he had said anything.

[Sevenfold]

yanbu
or should I say your dh isn't being

[ShellyBoobs]

I think walking around a supermarket eating is very bad manners. It's not so much the will they / won't they pay for it as the fact that it just looks greedy and chavvy.

It seems to be something that's only been popular over the last few years and is another sign of the way our society is going.

Yuk.

[worraliberty]

Gaaaahh!! Why do children have to snack to keep themselves quiet and occupied?

It wasn't like that in my day...no sireee!

A colouring book and pencils kept us quiet, not a gob full of food.

No wonder people end up boredom eating instead of eating when they're actually hungry.

[mousymouse]

I do that sometimes. if I forgot to take dc drink on a warm day for example. but I always pay for it.

[LaWeasel]

I think it's fine when it's a multipack type item (like a banana out of a pre-priced bag of bananas/cheese snack out of a pre-priced pack etc) because you're still going to pay for it at the end.

Giving DD an apple out of the bag at the beginning of the supermarket shop used to be a bloody lifesaver, I don't really care if it looked chavvy. She was a very young toddler who found being surrounded by food she wasn't allowed to eat hugely frustrating. Now she is a year or so older she will hold something and understands she isn't allowed to eat it until we leave the shop.

[WidowWadman]

"From a child's point of view it must be torment being taken round a shop of yummy things but not allowed to have any"

If you ask my 2.9 yo she will happily tell you "we must pay for it first" because that's what we taught her.

You can't have everything you want immediately, sometimes you have to wait. I think that's an important lesson.

I wouldn't run to staff to complain but I do teach my daughter that people who eat stuff without paying for it first are not very nice.

[worraliberty]

But even if it is a 'torment'...they'll get over it

Who knows, they may even learn the lesson that 'I want, doesn't always get'

[GuillotinedMaryLacey]

I absolutely hate this. And I can't get my head round these 'emergencies' that crop up either. Feed your kids before you go, take a drink if you're pg and hot (I am and always have a bottle of water in my bag). My diabetic father has never felt the need to eat a sandwich in the supermarket because his blood sugar has dropped. Again, he thinks about what he's doing. Unless you're unwittingly in Tescos for 5 hours instead of 1 then there is no reason for that either. It's just laziness. It's not about whether you'll pay for it at the end, it's completely unnecessary and not bloody yours.

[jandymaccomesback]

To the poster who asked, yes I have three children, one of whom has AS, and I never felt the need to give them a snack to get round the supermarket. I used to get them to "help" me by putting things in the trolley, or letting them hold things, or count the carrots into a bag etc. I find it a bit strange that children can't manage to get round a shop without eating.
No, we weren't stalking the woman, we just happened to see her three times.
And no, I don't think the staff would have been bothered, which is one reason why I stopped him.

[eurochick]

I would never do this. It's a horrible habit. Have we really reached the point where we can't do our shopping without simultaneously shoving crap in our mouths?

I think it's technically theft (whatever you are scoffing belongs to the supermarket and you intend to permanently deprive them of it, although you might offer compensation, i.e. the price of the goods), although most supermarkets seem to turn a blind eye.

[fanjoforthemammaries7850]

did your DH's face go all red and did steam come out of his ears?

[SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius]

Some people's diabetes is far more unstable, though, GML, so I can accept that someone's blood sugar could drop suddenly, even though your father's doesn't.

[worraliberty]

It's lazy parenting

Keeping them involved and interested, allowing them to help etc takes time

Some people prefer to give in and let the child stuff its face instead.

It does however make me wonder what that child's association with food will be like when they're older.

[BeaOnSea]

I don't like it - but it happened to me one day unintentionally.

DS1 was very young and sat on the seat in the trolley. I'd bought a long french stick loaf and he started nibbling the end. No problem I thought - who can resist a fresh loaf?

By the time I got to the checkout - he had helped himself to practically all the lovely soft inside of the loaf. I was quite embarrassed at the checkout to be paying for a hollow tube of bread

[GuillotinedMaryLacey]

OK, I'll give you the diabetes but I stand by everything else!

[ShellyBoobs]

And no, I don't think the staff would have been bothered, which is one reason why I stopped him.

Actually, they might well be bothered. Many people here seem to think the the manager wouldn't care, that it's perfectly ok do it and that your DH would be seen as some sort of idiot for mentioning it.

However, it's not so long since that I was busy paying for my shopping when a manager came over to the cashier and pointed out to her a family who had joined the back of her queue and that she must make sure any empty packets were scanned.

Actually, I think she used a particular word to describe what they'd been doing but I can't recall what it was. I don't think it was 'grazing', though.

[MrsHeffley]

I've always done this.I had 3 under 18 months and all 3 eating a bag of Organix crisps veeeery slowly enabled me to get a weeks shopping done.

Supermarkets don't mind in the slightest.I had one very nice manager get a bag down from a top shelf for me and even open it for said dc. Checkout staff always offer to bin empty packets.

Most supermarkets I know bend over backwards to keep stressed mums happy and to make the experience as stress free as poss,if this helps mums and gets them in the store I shouldn't think there would be a manager in the land who could care 2 hoots so op neb out.It really isn't a problem unless it's unpackaged fruit,you just put the empty packet in the trolley-end of.

You know at the end of a week some of us run out of snacks hence the need to shop,if anybody thinks I'd be shoving 3 toddlers into a trolley to buy snacks,queue up at checkout,pay, then go back in to begin a major shop are bonkers.

Some people have waaaay too much time on their hands.