Those who drink no alcohol, please talk me through the benefits..

[alcoholfreelifeforme]

DH and I have never been massive drinkers, but we have definitely gone through phases of drinking more heavily. It always seems to be around the time we have a 2 year old 😅 and this is our third, but we seem to have a hard time of it and feel things are tough and we’ll always drink a bottle and then some usually abojt 3 nights a week.

I know on a Friday at work I am thinking of the drink waiting for me at home. Sometimes I will have it before the kids have gone to bed, so I can look forward to feeling tipsy after they have.
This is probably the only time I really crave a drink.

Whenever I have 1, I always want another one. I can never stop at 1. I can mostly stop at 2, sometimes I want more. The day after I just feel shit! Full of anxiety, self critical, moody, short tempered with the kids, the list goes on..

So we’ve decided to go 99% alcohol free with the exception of a glass on Christmas Day.

Anyone else done this? Please help motivate me! What did you notice improved for you?

I've been sober for 5 months, for me, my mental and general health have improved. I'm even enjoying socialising more as I can focus better on conversation and know when I should go home whereas before I'd also fancy just one more. My hangovers were awful, so by choosing not to drink I'm choosing not to feel like that.. It feels like self-care.
Good luck with it and hopefully you feel the benefits too.

Everything will improve, your skin your health your finances. I have up alcohol 8 years ago and I've never felt better.
I've stopped ageing, I've lost 5 stone. I can't bear to be around drunk people now.

All the other benefits mentioned here – plus a few more.

No embarrassment about what I said or did last night. I never have to wake up and cringe at my behaviour. (I never did anything really heinous when I drank but even the occasional clumsy remark or oversharing used to make me burn with shame.) That has done wonders for my confidence and sense of calm.

This one is a bit more serious: I know I can get through the worst of times. Something terrible happened to my family about a year ago (alcohol-related) and I dread to think how I might have reacted with drinking. I can imagine how emotions would have been heightened, I might have lashed out verbally, I can see how a few hungover days would have made everything so much worse. It's been hard but I am really proud of how I've stayed calm and taken care of my family. I needed all my strength to get through it and even a few blurry weekends would have turned me into a complete mess.

Also, I feel I can trust my emotions sober and it's ok to be upset or angry.

it makes my face red and makes me hot, dh doesnt drink
i bought a bottle of cider and have drunk half of it and am still waiting for the right moment to finish it, the moment has not come

@KookyRoseCrab

thats poor form from them. My local pub/bar has a wide range of non alcoholic including multiple ales, we’re all canned but such is demand they have one on keg now (still not like cask ale alas) multiple cider options too, they don’t sell the big brands so all from the Bristol/somerset area. 5 different a/f gins too as well as lots of fancy tonics fine on their own. A/f wine is available but it’s revolting quite frankly. I do drink alcohol but don’t always choose to, I’m a rare beast who can take it or leave it

2nd Saturday morning waking up without a hangover. I feel great. I have loads of energy, my old tighter jeans fit me, and I really enjoyed the grapefruit dash I had last night watching MAFS 😁

I can’t see us drinking now until Christmas time, but that obviously makes me question how to get through the Xmas period… 2 x works Xmas dos, Christmas Day, Boxing Day and new years. NYE less so because DH and I tend to stay in so that won’t be a problem, but the others will..

Don't worry about the Xmas period, take it one day at a time. The first work events when I wasn't drinking were the weirdest but nobody really noticed. I feel more confident now to let colleagues know I'm not boozing currently. Now I've gone on to do weddings, funerals and all kinds of meet ups.
I have the occasional wobble before events like weddings as I really enjoyed drinking (to excess!) at those but when the day comes I feel comfortable not drinking and find I'm quite relaxed and happy to call it a night at a sensible time. That feeling of getting into bed sober and waking up with a clear head is pure joy. So if you don't want to drink at these events, its possible just requires planning and resolve.

I have more money. My head is clear every day. I never have a hangover. My body is better, my skin is better, my face is no longer puffy. I’m not damaging my system. I have more energy. My children don’t see me drink, so I’m not normalising it for them. DH drinks too much but me being teetotal makes it harder for him to ignore that. I don’t have my mum and my grandparents’ voices nagging me in my head every time I pour a drink (they were drinkers at Christmas and birthdays only and even then my grandparents would share a glass with a single measure of martini and lemonade and consider it an indulgence). I’ve lost weight, both from alcohol calories and not binge eating rubbish while drinking.

I don’t drink much at all.

it really impacts my mental health and makes me anxious - for days sometimes. It was I massively impacts the quality of my sleep even one drink can do it, but worse the more I drink… It can take me a few days to catch back up. I also like to workout and the doms is much worse if I drink (likely due to the dehydration!)

Totally recommend having a good variety of interesting AF drinks in the house because there will be times when you want something to titillate your tastebuds. I rarely crave a drink now but I just went downstairs and DH had a bottle of ice cold local cider on the side and I almost asked him to pour me some, but it was the flavour I was craving as much as the alcohol, so I had an ice cold ginger ale instead. Bubbles, same colour, love ginger. Nearly there and enough to keep me on the straight path.

I was the same, to the point I had severe health anxiety and yet still drank wine for that temporary relief - only to make things worse again the next day (I also woke every night around 3am with the worst anxiety and fear, I would roll around the bed unable to sleep for hours) I’m now 4 years sober and my health anxiety and general anxiety is completely gone. No medication at all, turned out drinking a few glasses of wine every evening was enough to cause me debilitating anxiety that I was “medicating” with more bloody wine!

the benefits for me have been life changing. I feel content, relaxed, level headed and peaceful. I have some physical benefits but they don’t even compare to the emotional and wellbeing benefits x

Would this really make a difference if you only drink one or two nights a week at the weekend. Like a glass of wine also has relaxing qualities

I don’t think about booze, ever really.
So, it’s not a part of my life anymore.

Used to go to the pub when I was younger.
But grew out of drinking after 40, I’d say.

I haven’t actively given it up, though.
I’ll have an occasional half or a drop of fizz.

AF for 3.5 years. Skin is good, less headaches, no palpitations. No waking up in the night with guilt of having drunk too much, no internal discussion re whether I should or shouldn’t have a drink or how much, I can always drive. Loads of benefits but I’ll be honest, after the first 6 months or so, it just becomes normal life and you don’t really think about the benefits (unless someone starts a thread like this!)

Honestly OP…dont drink at Christmas, just don’t do it. Be sober on your works nights out, have a sober Christmas. Just shut that internal debate down and just don’t drink. You’re going well so why take a step back?

I stopped drinking 9 years ago when i got pregnant with my first. Massive benefits to mental health. Able to cope alot better even though ive got 3 kids now. No anxiety. Physically more able. No depression from hang overs. No making poor choices whilst drunk. No continual stress of trying to control it and then failing. I also stopped smoking at the same time. Obviously i dont end up taking drugs anymore too because im not drinking. I dont associate with any heavy drinkers now either. Ive not had certain bad things or situations happen because i can keep myself safe now. My skin always looks healthy. Obviously im not wasting money now. Best change i ever made and wish i hadve done it permanently much earlier in life.

For what it's worth in my experience if you drink at Christmas it will end up creeping back to where it was and then some. Your brain will always want to get you back there as long as you 'feed it'. That's how alcohol works.
If you feel so much better for it then ask yourself why planning to drink at Christmas adds anything to your festive experience. Just get yourself some AF drinks and enjoy yourself sober! The more you do AF events the more you'll realise it's possible.

The anxiety is caused by the excess cortisol that is created when the body is trying to balance the dopamine rush. The dopamine returns to normal levels quite quickly but cortisol takes longer to dissipate so you are left with an excess which results in that jittery anxious feeling. Its grim.

You feel genuine joy and get to experience happiness without the need for alcohol. It’s like the joy that children get. You feel free, you don’t feel like the situation would be better if you added a drink. It’s not needed.

I never knew this. Thanks for explaining. I understand now why I’ve felt so awful the next day.

@Wakeuplittlebunnies- so very true, I have now realised this! I have been living my life almost reliant on alcohol, thinking that I need it to get through certain situations, and then actually feeling worse about myself and my ability to cope in life because I’ve assumed I can’t cope, that I need alcohol to cope. I feel it has made me a less
confident person as a result of this.
Now I’ve stopped, and even though it’s only been a couple of weeks, I have gained this huge appreciation for the freeness of it all. In the past I assumed people who’d gone sober were doing it through gritted teeth dreaming of the day they’d have another drink, but I now know what you gain, you lose nothing, but gain everything.