My drunk dad

[PinkPavlova]

On Thursday nights, it’s sort of become a tradition to call my parents on FaceTime, and my husband, 9 year old daughter and 8 year old son always come to the phone. But this time, my mum picked up, really flustered, and telling us maybe we should call on Friday because that would be a better time. My kids were clueless, however, me and my husband could hear my dad slurring and drunkenly talking in the background. My dad never used to drink when I was growing up, however, my brother was put into rehab a couple of days ago, so is this my dad’s way of coping, and if so, how do I get him to stop drinking?

Hi, others may be along with better advice and experience but I didn't want to read and run.

Is this something that he has done before? Or a new incident? It could be a one off.

I would suggest speaking to you mum privately and see if it is a one off and get her take on it.

You can't get anyone to stop drinking. Consider how hard it is to change a habit of your own. That's why you have no chance of stopping either of them drinking.

I'm a member of 2 1l2-steo fellowships, one being Al-Anon.

Your best bet is to contact Al-Anon. Your brother clearly has a problem, even if your dad's turns out to be a one-off.

Al-Anon is the support network for family members of someone whose drinking is causing a problem in the families life, had, has, is alive, or passed.

Here's the link. If you don't want to use it, at least give it to your parents so they have the option. There are online meetings as well as face to face.

It works on the basis of no longer feeling/being alone with the problem, as all people are like-minded who have or had the same struggles who attend.

al-anonuk.org.uk/

You don’t. Unless he has a longstanding problem with alcohol, you just call another night. Sometimes people without drinking problems drink too much, especially under stress.

If he has an ongoing drinking problem, that’s for him to sort out, not you. If you can’t rely on him to be sober for your weekly call, you stop the weekly call until he can be.