The CEO of Adoption UK has Answered Your Questions

[FrancescaMumsnet]

Are you thinking of adopting? Or in the processes of doing so? Or have questions about the process you went through?

Now is your chance to ask the questions you want answered, or perhaps the questions you were too afraid to ask!

On Tuesday, March 26th Sue Armstrong-Brown, the chief executive of Adoption UK, will be coming to Mumsnet to answer all your adoption questions.

Sue also has an adopted daughter so has personally been through the adoptive process herself.

The adoption process can be confusing, emotionally exhausting, but also exciting. We’ve asked Sue to join us at Mumsnet, to clear up any confusion and put your nerves at ease by answering as many of your questions as she can (within reason!)

Just pop your comment or question in the thread and we’ll ask Sue.

Look out for the video next week!

Hi @Iamthestorm

Unlike the Pupil Premium grant for disadvantaged children, which aims to reduce the attainment gap caused by economic disadvantage, Pupil Premium Plus is awarded in recognition that many adopted and permanently placed children need extra support in school because of the circumstances that led to them being placed into care, and later being adopted or being placed on a SGO or CAO.

Therefore, according to the Department for Education Q&A document on PP+ (2014), it ought to be spent on “helping these children emotionally, socially and educationally by providing specific support, to raise their attainment and address their wider needs.”

The same document states that “it is not intended that the additional funding should be used to back-fill the general school budget nor . . . used to support other groups of pupils”. See link to the Q&A document, below:
www.pac-uk.org/department-education-response-main-queries-adopted-children-pupil-premium/

For more info see An Introduction to Pupil Premium Plus. www.adoptionuk.org/Handlers/Download.ashx?IDMF=c2d0ad9f-cb4b-4a01-8c0d-cb2f7814fbdd

Is PP+ ring-fenced?

Pupil Premium Plus is not ring-fenced either to the eligible cohort of children, or to an individual eligible child. This allows schools to, for instance, pool funds to employ a staff member to support a group of children which may include some who are not entitled to PP+, as long as the provision is primarily designed to support the PP+ cohort.

Hi @Geordie Genes

Adoption UK here.

The adoption process can seem very intense but it is necessary as most of the children who are placed for adoption come from a background of trauma and have suffered neglect and abuse. Parenting them can be very challenging and it is important to assess that prospective adopters have the strengths and resilience to undertake the challenges to parent them. It is important also to assess how prospective adopters’ own relationships and experiences will influence their parenting.

The first stage of the process should take around two months and this is when all the checks are done; including references, medical reports, financial and DBS checks. At the end of this period, the prospective adopters will receive a written decision from their adoption agency on whether they can proceed to stage two.

The second stage should take around four months and is the full assessment or home study. During this time the social worker gets to know you and your family. During this stage prospective adopters will receive training and preparation to provide them with the tools and knowledge to take on a more therapeutic approach to parenting.

This period culminates with the creation of a detailed report by the agency, followed by submission to the adoption panel. A decision is then made on whether the prospective adopter is suitable to adopt or not.

If you need more information please call out helpline - www.adoptionuk.org/helpline

Hi @Qui Quai Quod

Adoption UK here.

Under the Data Protection Act there is no legal right to see the parents medical notes without their consent. The birth parents would be encouraged by the agency to provide information on their medical history and it would be explained why it is important for the welfare of the child but they are under no obligation.

Hi @UnderTheNameOfSanders

Please find the answers to your questions, below:

Can you recommend strategies for minimising any negative impact on younger sibling who is not yet ready for contact themselves?

This can have an impact on younger siblings. Adoption UK would advise contacting the post adoption team for therapeutic help if things get tricky. It all depends on the individual though and the relationship between siblings and parents. We'd also suggest you call the AUK helpline or post adoption support at their local authority. Talk Adoption is also good for advice on teenagers.

What support is there in general for adoptive parents of older teens?

Post adoption team, Talk Adoption (part of After Adoption). We'd also recommend joining an adoption support group for parents – AUK offers groups across the UK. There are also courses/training on teenagers put on by AUK/PAC UK and our free helpline can provide a list of recommended books. The army of adopters on our online forums also have a wealth of knowledge - so join up if you haven't already. Here’s a link to our online forum:
forum.adoptionuk.org/forum

Hi @Iamthestorm

There are lots of books to help adoptees make sense of where they came from and to explain why they're experiencing certain feelings and anger. Examples include:

My Parents Picked Me!’ - By Pat Thomas and Lesley Harker
‘And Then you Arrived And We Became A Family’ – By Almud Kunert & Annette Hildebrandt
‘Nutmeg Gets Adopted’ – BAAF Publication by Judith Foxon

Hi @DonutCone

In an ideal world no sibling group would be separated. But in each individual case the social worker will look at what is in the best interest of each child.

There can be a number of reasons for siblings to be separated - they may be part of a big sibling group which can make it difficult for them all to be matched with the same adopters. They may have formed unhealthy trauma bonds with each other which make a home environment toxic and mean that instead of beginning to heal, they re-traumatise each other.

Other reasons to separate siblings include sibling on sibling abuse, or intense sibling rivalry. And sometimes siblings simply don't know their brothers and sisters well because of age difference and because they're in and out of foster care.

In Scotland Children’s minister Maree Todd MSP, has recently announced plans to amend the law to keep siblings together when they are placed in local authority care, where it is in their interests to do so:
www.scottishlegal.com/article/plans-to-improve-the-law-for-brothers-and-sisters-in-the-care-system

Regular contact between siblings placed in different adoptive families can be vital to help build trust, secure attachments and healthy relationships. However, some children will not be able to cope with this kind of contact and it has to be considered on a case by case basis.

Hi @ThatPairOfCats

In response to your question around social media there is currently no legal protection in place around birth parents contacting their children on social media. For advice for supporting a child with contact call our free and independent helpline - www.adoptionuk.org/helpline

Hi @Duckyneedsaclean

Birth parents can make suggestions - either of a specific person or type of person (e.g. religion). Local authorities should take parent wishes seriously but aren't obliged to fulfil these - especially for a named person they would still need to assess suitability to meet the child’s needs.

All prospective parents have to be assessed by social services. No individual case is the same.

Hi @DaveSpondoolix

Your BMI will not automatically prevent you from adopting, only three things will automatically disbar you -www.first4adoption.org.uk/who-can-adopt-a-child/who-cant-adopt/

But the main thing about adoption is the focus has to be on the needs of the child...to be provided with a long term forever family. Not only will they look at somebody’s weight, they will look at their whole health and lifestyle.

Thanks for answering my questions, both they and the video were really helpful.