Constant hunger

[Tishtash2teeth]

Our gorgeous boy has been with is just over a year and on the whole we have had a fantastic year and he has settled well. He has made logs of progress and is doing really well. One area that we still seem to be battling is the constant hunger. It starts the minute he has eaten his breakfast. He begins to whine that he his still very very hungry and that his belly is rumbling. He begs me for food all day long and it can get very irritating. If we go to friends houses "I'm hungry" is the first thing he says. I have tried to explain to well meaning friends that he isn't really hungry, but I can still spend the whole time trying to fend of their offers (I always let him have something, but as soon as he has had the first offering he starts to say his is still hungry).

I understand why he does this and we have tried different tactics, but he seems to be getting worse. Maybe it is just heightened this time of year beachside of all the chocolate he was booth for Xmas. I suppose I am hoping for advise on tactics that may have worked for others. I think my little boys will have a life long tendency to overheat but how should I deal with this on a day or day basis?

tish don't feel bad, I feel like I'm under feeding dd2 (9m) there is so much information about what not to feed, what to feed, what's good/bad , you can't do right for wrong!

Why don't you have a week of giving him what he want / his favourite foods. Even if it is fish fingers and chips and see what he is like after when you know he has had a full meal. I'd be tempted to let him eat what he likes with in reason . But I'm a softy!

Would he have boiled egg and soldiers for breakfast ?

Tish don't feel bad. I have adopted son who is 3, I am very lucky he doesn't have any food issues. I have a friend who does though and she finds It very hard.
I would make healthy food available all the time for him. Just leave healthy snacks out and let him know he can help himself. Maybe try and up his protein so he feels fully longer. My son loves eggs, peanut butter, other nut butters, hummous and bread sticks.
Does he like cooking? My son loves watching I can cook then making what they make.
Hopefully in the future he will be able to self regulate his food and at least not feel so anxious about it.
Good luck

Sometimes children miss out on developmental stages if they have a traumatic early life (and even the best possible scenario for looked after children contains trauma). It may be that he doesn't correctly interpret how his body feels and doesn't know what hungry is. For instance, my DS took years to toilet train because he couldn't interpret the cues that he needed to go to the loo the way that most children can, so the wee/poo would just come out with no warning.

Perhaps you could talk about tummy feelings, rather than using the word hunger, with him. So for instance, if you were eating an ice-cream together tell him that you can feel the coldness sliding down your throat and into your tummy, and ask him if he can feel the path of the ice-cream inside his body. Give him fizzy water on an empty-ish stomach and get him to tell you how it feels in his tummy and whether he needs to burp etc. Or hot soup/hot chocolate on a cold day, trace the path down to the tummy. Talk about your own body around mealtimes, for instance at lunch you can say that you can feel a little breakfast left at the bottom but there is a big empty space in your tummy ready for lunch. Encourage him to push his tummy gently from the outside as well so that he can feel the difference between before a meal and the fullness/tightness after a meal.

Hi,
Some of your post sounds very familiar to me. Our boy is same age, and will often ask "and now what shall we have to eat" immediately after breakfast. When i say that mid morning snack will follow, he will ask what time etc.

We talk about his tummy and his head needing time to talk to each other after we eat, so that he learns it takes a while for his body to recognise he has had food. Like PP have said, recognising what hunger feels like, is difficult for him. He says his belly hurts when he is hungry, or needs a poo, or has an upset tummy. He hasn't yet learnt the difference so we are working on that with him.

If chocolate is his comfort then I wouldn't take it away but how snout biting him more of a sandwich or wrap and less chocolate, like a few chocolate buttons?

As I'm sure that you realise, this can be a hangover from previous experierence (lack of routine / predictability so the child not knowing when the next food is coming - not to imply that it didn't come, but that it was unpredictable). You probably do this already but keep explaining your times of meals and snacks to him for a few weeks to provide him with security ... we have breakfast at 8 o clock, fruit snack at 10, lunch at 12, biscuit and milk at 2, tea at 4:30, toast and hot chocolate at 6:30. You could do a little drawing, point to the clock numbers. Good luck. X

Or if that sounds too rigid / controlling, explain the meal times and say that he can take from the fruit bowl in between, unless it is close to the meal.

DS was adopted at 1 and had food and drink issues right from the beginning. I was expecting them based on the prep course and so I was kind of prepared and did manage to crack them and certainly isn't an issue now (aged 8) but he was much younger than your DS so maybe what I did isn;t so appropriate - I'm not sure.

In DS's case, although some of the issue was hunger/appetite - he'd never eaten when he was hungry, never eaten until he was full and so hadn't really learnt to recognise hunger and certainly hadn't learnt to recognise when he was full. So I let him eat his dinner and keep eating (more dinner or healthy stuff like yoghurt etc) until he wanted to stop. He pretty much ate until he was sick every day for months. I wondered if I was going to kill him by letting him eat until he exploded!

It slowly improved and gradually normalised.

The bigger issue which took a little longer was the control thing - he needed control over his drink in particular (not so much food though I took the same approach with food) - he hadn't have free access to drink before and was terrrifed that people were going to take his drink (and food) away - so I gave him a sippy cup of water which he carried around with him for months and months and months. He didn't put it down pretty much, just walked around with it.

He didn't have free access to food and treat food was given by me in specific circumstances but "normal" food he was allowed as much as he liked and he could have anything on my "allowed" list whenever he wanted or would make him tea early or give him seconds or thirds of dinner rather than give him a separate snack or a "treat". I even had to resort to the dreaded rice cakes (which I hate) to allow him to eat when he wanted to without piling too many calories into him.

Good luck

tishtash2teeth i am not yet an adopter But am approved to adopt. I am also someone who has struggled either over eating and eating when not really hungry. Which I think can be a sign of other concerns, at least in adults so possibly in children too. I think people have given you excellent advice re food. I would certainlt give the good advice a go and try a selection of things. My feeling is this not about him not having enough food. He is either unable to tell when he is hungry (or thirsty, or maybe bored etc). It may be helpful yo read up about areas yo do with food, constant hunger etc and If it does not get better when you face tried the new food ideas ( which sound very good). ì would see If you can get any help with working out why he feels they need to ask for food and How yo get him to relax after food. The fact he can watch TV and not ask for food suggests he IMHO he can relax from food when otherwise occupied. As comfort food is important to him don't IMHO remove it.i think it will help you get to the bottom ot the problem yo help him make healthier choices together with you rather than making dome foods off limite which could set up a forbidden fruit thing IYSWIM. Good luck. Sorry for typos, phone unpredictable!

Yo should be to and dome should be some! Sorry. Pm me If this message does not make sense! Sorry.

Yes agree I have a 1 year old and she eats

Breakfast 7am
1 and half weetabix followed by fruit and 1 ill cup of juice

Snack 9:30
Fruit and some cheese crackers

Lunch 12pm
Beans on toast followed by fruit pot

Snack 2pm
Yougert and quavers

Dinner 4pm
What ever we are having followed by pudding

6 bed

good luck. and don't be too surprised if you get food issues sorted at home but he still begs or gorges out of the home. friends step children still do this age 12 + 13 after a chaotic unsettled young childhood. 4 years down the line they still want to eat all the nice stuff on offer every time in case there isn't a next time.

Sorry, a bit late to this, but just wondering (in addition to all the advice above): If you are quite certain he is NOT hungry and yet he keeps saying he IS hungry, than maybe 'I'm hungry' is 'code' for something else, such as 'I need comforting' or 'I'm worried' or something? Just a thought. Totally agree that food issues are common, but sometimes it isn't actually a food issue, but something else that happens to express itself in food terminology.

Totally agree Meita as someone who has overeaten for ages food is often not just about food!

My 2 yr old dd eats more than this. I do find that one really good meal I the middle of the day works best.

She'll have 2 weetabix for breakfast then a banana and an apple plus grapes as a snack. Then baked potato, cheese and beans or pasta for lunch then more fruit and/or cheese as snacks then whatever we have for tea, such as shepherds pie.

I'd skip the sugary stuff and only offer fruit.

I always have a massive beaker of water available at all times which helps.

I have 4 year old twin boys.
They are both slim and very active. Today they have eaten:
Breakfast: bowl of cornflakes with milk, slice of toast, satsuma
Snack: slice of marmite toast, apple
Lunch: half a baked potato, beans, tomatoes, grated cheese
Snack: banana
Tea: crackers with chicken and mayo, 2 yog tubes, apple, glass of milk

Make very small changes (re the sugary stuff) but offer him food everytime he asks for it and feed him until he can't eat anymore at mealtimes. I'd be tempted to offer him a drink first when he says he's hungry as it will fill him up a bit and also often childrne find it difficult to distinguish hunger from thirst

Also try offering "sugary" fruit to start with like raisins when you would normally offer a sweet snack. I don;t think too much dried fruit is ideal but it will give him the sensation of something more sugary/sticky.

I also used to have a rule with DS - chocolate has to be preceded by a piece of fruit - ALWAYS! Not so necessary now as he doesn;t eat much chocolate.