Sinister or just a bit creepy

[fanjoforthemammaries7850]

Was sitting in shopping centre today while DD was asleep in buggy, reading emails on my phone. I suddenly got a request on phone to accept a bluetooth message from someone.

i said no, and when I looked up a really creepy looking guy was staring at me and on his phone.

Not exaggerating but he looked like Peter Tobin, he had that hollow cheeked staring eye sinister look.

He then came and sat just behind me. I then kept getting this request to accept a bluetooth message. I then accidentally accepted it and it was a business card with his mobile number.

I felt SERIOUSLY uncomfortable then and left, with him staring. I then was worried he was following me all afternoon and that he would even follow me home.

DH says I should consider reporting him to the police but I am not sure.

WWYD?

wmmc I'm fairly techhy and want to ask - eh??

It was 100% not like flirting, he actually looked like he was at the least on pretty strong drugs if not completely insane.

you can hide your phone

I won't report him.

The flirting though would have been a laugh which I would have taken in good spirits. This was not.

Thanks all

phone is now hidden

disguised as a camera?

LSPB you may well be 'techhy'

Cloaking - you can either broadcast your bluetooth or hide it. Cloaking is the latter. It's a phone setting. If you RTFM most phones have a very clear explanation in there to help you achieve this.

Fanjo - maybe he thought you would sell him some crack if he introduced himself

Maybe it wasn't the creepy weirdo staring at me and fumbling for his phone, but a totally fit hunk sitting upstairs out of sight

aha that's clear as mud thanks! Think I'll hang up my tecchy cloak

ALso thanks to all the peeps who understood why I felt threatened

Fanjo, I do understand how threatening that can be. Bad enough to be near a looming nutter, much less that he's trying to communicate silently

It will probably never happen to you again. He's probably only just got a phone as part of his care in the community support plan and learned how to do it and was trying to see what would happen (if anything). You did the right thing not responding, he won't know if it was received or not.

If you see him again, walk quickly to a crowded place and contact the police.

Luckily it WAS a crowded shopping centre, would have been very scared if it was in a secluded spot!!

It may not of been him, just coincidental he was staring

If it was him, I doubt he was being sinister, after all, was sending his phone number! Not very bright

Just a inept flirter

It sounds like he's really shaken you up. Have you considered doing some sort of self-defence training so you feel more confident if anything like this happens again? I'm not saying it's likely to, but if you have strategies for dealing with it you don't feel so lost in that sort of situation IME.

Err, no, it was him, he was pressing buttons on his phone and then staring hard at me.

I probably should do some self-defence. It probably wouldn't NORMALLY shake me up so much, I was already a bit tearful when it happened.

Hmmm, most of the people who get attacked are generally underconfident in their demeanour so it might help you.

Your local council should be able to tell you what's available in your area (leisure services dept). I used to teach aikido - that's a good martial art for women (makes your bum smaller too! )

Well, sadly I have a really gammy leg and knee but I could do something that involved standing on the spot and punching really fast, like kangaroo boxing

I have taught self defence for the disabled - if people with missing limbs can defend themselves I'm sure you can

It does sound like you'd feel safer if you felt more confident in your ability to defend yourself. Especially if your mobility is compromised.

Sorry. I didn't meant to insult you and I do understand how some mens actions can be quite threatening. You did the right thing by trusting your instincts and getting away from him. I think contacting the police is a bit ott, unless of course you see him again and he does the same thing. In which case this is repeated behaviour and I would consider further action.

Thanks wmmc, will give it some serious thought

It's OK Thingiebob

Now off to bed as am totally shattered, thanks again all!

I think what makes me uncomfortable is the attitude that 'being a bit creepy' is a crime that needs reporting. Lots of people can be percieved as a bit wierd/creepy/ugly/socially inept and sometimes the perceiver is (as the OP suggests she was) already upset and feeling vulnerable therefore be more distressed by something that, were she feeling full of the joys of life, she would shrug off as no big deal. Remember, this man doesn't appear to have done anything other than attempt to give his phone number. He didn't get his cock out, speak to her, send a message saying 'Nice tits' or try to touch her. And this happened in a shopping centre in broad daylight.
It can't be not OK to make an approach to a stranger - otherwise no one would ever get a date. Just making an approach, even a bit ineptly, is not a crime - refusing to take 'Go away' with good grace is a different matter.

Well, I share your concerns, which is why I posted here and am not going to report him, probably never would really, but DH suggested it.

It isn't that I feel he should be "punished" and "strung up" etc, more that I feel Ishouldn't be made to feel uncomfortable and scared when just out shopping, and it did, because he came and sat right behind me and stared at me while repeatedly sending the message although i had rejected it.

He didn't follow me but I felt like he might, as he didn't just seem a BIT creepy but a LOT.

Anyway no harm came of it.

Hopefully he would still be as harmless if someone accepted his number and called it, that is what I was concerned about really.