Any psychologists about please? What is DD describing?

[LoopingStar]

Hi,
DD16 told me that she has "versions" of herself and shifts from one to another without a pattern. If i google what she's described, it suggests things like schizophrenia or bi polar but that doesn't seem to match, it seems more like (another google about psychology) sub-personalities or multiplicities(?), I don't recognise what she's talking about.

There's:

1. an empty version where she doesn't really feel anything & thinks if something sad happened when she is in this version,such as her bf breaking up with her, she wouldn't care 2)a mean one but "it" thinks mean things about other people, its not just negative self talk, and gives her a different kind of empty feeling, she says she automatically opposes whatever the mean one says
2. a god complex saying she's better than others 4)a methodical version that goes through things calmly And some others she hasn't named.

She finds "them" distressing, especially the "mean" one. I am totally out of my depth and don't understand what she's describing.
Probably need a GP appointment so she can explain to tgem.

It started about 10 months ago when there was upheaval with home "improvements" which still aren't done (but much better than it was) and her younger brother's mental health was bad, so might be related to that?
She said the mean one turned up first, then the methodical one.

Others have mentioned this work- here is the book. It is incredibly helpful as it doesn’t pathologise (is that even a word?) these different parts but focuses on each part of us being there to help and to understand them more and embrace them and challenge the not so helpful ones by understanding them and letting them “stand down”. It’s quite deep so maybe you could look at it together but it avoids the “label and medicate” attitude of so many time poor GPs these days…

16 is around the time you start becoming much more complex mentally and also self aware at th same time. Could it be she is just grappling with that? I remember saying something around that time about myself like 'I'm a horrible person because I think horrible things about people', but it wasn't a permanent belief, just becoming aware of what my mind was doing as it developed.

I’m no expert, but the fact that your Dd finds this distressing and the presence of the “god like” version would make me want to seek professional advice.

Can you afford to go private? It could be something and it could be nothing, a medical professional is the only one who can tell you.

I have no qualifications whatsoever but here's my two pennorth. Sorry its a ramble about my own experience and my be irrelevant!

14-16 is a very vulnerable age ime

Your dd is surely acutely aware of what's been happening with her brother which I would wager will be contributing to this. When I was a similar age to your DD, my mother suffered from an exacerbation of her poor mental health and it did unbalance me - I felt 'unmoored' and confused about my relationship with the world - even more so than I was doing anyway thanks to adolescence. I really began to doubt my own mind - I became aware of how subjective reality actually is and that there is not just one fixed, reassuring way to experience it, if you see what I mean. It was very disorientating.

It did pass, sort of, but I could probably have done with some impartial professional help at the time (instead of just being told when I confided in my dad "don't tell your mother")

Given the parlous state of MH services I would be inclined to look for a counsellor with some formal psychological qualifications. They may feel it's better to refer to the NHS but I think that's where I'd start. As pps have said it may be a manifestation of a reasonably help-able anxiety. I know it seems very florid and it may indeed be a disorder that needs psychiatric input, but on the other hand looking back, I know I had some weird perceptions (eg hearing a rumble of conversation - not voices , just talking) and I think in my case it was due to anxiety combined with the intense cognitive changes and 're-modelling' of adolescence

Im so glad she's able to takk to you about it. Very best wishes to you all.

Check her internet and social media history. It’s quite the in thing now amongst some teens to have DID.

(In fact I think Dad did take me to the doctor but it was the 70s and the doctor was a drunk (literally) , so I was just dismissed. I'd hopefully have a more sympathetic ear if I d been 16 in 2026)

You've had some really insightful posts already
I think your DD thinks she has DID, but the fact that she seems to be suggesting this indicates that it's not. Nothing about it says bipolar disorder to me. There is a lot of pathologising going on.

Personalities with DID are not generally aware of each ither. The therapy focuses on making them aware of each other and integrating them into one personality,

gp is your best bet.

Hmm
my 13yo said similar about 6m ago. What she was saying sounded like DID but she was also suicidal and depressed, but also severely anaemic - only a 4.

She was dissociating and hallucinating too.

cahms rejected even with the suicidal talk!

But i dont think shes had an episode since nov.

However like pp are saying — mine is audhd. So they could be right about it being autism. Mine has never seen tictoc but does have youtube. However it was anyway a genuine MH crisis.

" the fact that she seems to be suggesting this indicates that it's not."

This doesn't prove that it's not DID. Lots of people with DID and other dissociative disorders are the ones to first figure it out, particularly as many professionals are bad at recognising trauma-related disorders.

It could be just something she's picked up from the internet and is misinterpreting normal experiences, but equally without more information a dissociative disorder shouldn't be ruled out.

I had this when I was about 7 after my dad died. I would have to pretend im someone else to switch off from the emotional turmoil of what was happening in my family. I was quite mean with it but also very numb like nothing could faze me. Im mid 50s now and under the crisis team as its followed me through my life. I would also dissociate and have out of body experiences.

My 18yr old occasionally complains about feeling this way.
I dont really know what to say or think when he does.
All of his friends seem to have some sort of issue too.

I would say most people have multiple parts of themselves.

Most people have a conscious where we have a little voice in our head and is more rational than our other selves.

It may be that she’s just realising this and grappling with where she fits in life.

I would definitely make a gp appointment if it’s worrying her.
If there is something it’s always better to nip it in the bud.

FWIW if she does have something, it isn’t necessarily a bad thing.
In the West, we see certain conditions as bad but other countries see them as a blessing.

I listened to a podcast a while ago about how in this country schizophrenia is seen as a bad thing and therefore the person has more negative thoughts but in places like Africa it is seen as a blessing and therefore the person has more positive thoughts.

Lots of people have these sorts of conditions and are extremely happy and successful people.

I’m not diagnosed with anything (maybe I should be!) but I don’t have consistent responses to situations/people etc to the extent where I do surprise myself. Example; one person could tell me something objectively sad on Monday and my first response/thought would be a disinterested one (why are they telling me this?) which I’m careful not to show!
Someone else could tell me the same thing the day after and I’ll have a flood of feeling/sympathy/empathy etc.
I can’t predict what my first response is but the key for me is knowing what the socially appropriate response is and using that.
I also do think that mine is hormone related, I’m generally much less patient and therefore more likely to have a disinterested response at certain points in my cycle

I think there is a need to have a label in young people nowadays.

Its not an attention thing but they feel that they need to fit into certain boxes else they feel something is wrong with them.

Perhaps it’s always been that way and I’m only just realising it but I definitely see young people as needing to have labels.

I am a psychologist who works with young people and has for several years - will add the disclaimer that my response can't be a true clinical opinion since i haven't met her. As pp have said, we all have different aspects to ourselves and they are more defined in some people than others. Teenagers often become more aware of this as they get older and work to make sense of that. Just as with adults, some feel that these different personas are more defined and separate, while others dont. Young people with autism can be a bit more likely to separate them out because of their difficulty in seeing shades of gray. In most cases, there's no reason to worry about it - just help her to process how she's feeling and find strategies to respond to the negative thoughts without overvaluing them - the more she focuses on them or worries about them, the stronger they'll get - like engaging with a bully or feeding a gremlin. Self help strategies for stress/anxiety might help in the first instance, and, as people have said, looking into other support locally if it's causing her distress.

Conditions like DID come with other very severe symptoms, it's usually associated with memory loss, significant distress, strong feelings of being out of control and dissociated, symptoms of depression etc., and is invariably linked with severe interpersonal trauma. It's very unlikely that she's developing DID without there having been significant mental health concerns along the way.

@LoopingStar I don't mean to judge your dd but you should be aware that she is repeating the same symptoms that are described in tictok videos and the like, about DID which are fueling a massive social contagion much like the tourettes social contagion we have seen.
These young people do not have either DID or tourettes. They have learned and internalised the "symptoms" and its becoming a massive problem amongst the younger generations.
With tourettes theirs no cure for the real thing and the ticks that come with it are individual however for those with the new form of social contagion driven tourettes CBT and talking therapy cures it as it isn't really tourettes but a psychosomatic social contagion that copies the ticks of the main tourettes videos that they've been watching.
DID is an extremely rare diagnosis which has also been massively over self diagnosed by the younger generation who are "catching" it from social media in the same way as tourettes now is.
I know that for a parent it must be frightening for your child to start behaving as if they have either of these conditions but detoxing from social media and some CBT will "cure" them. If I was you I'd be looking at your dds social media and get her into therapy ASAP before things get worse for her as the longer the social contagion is allowed to fester the harder it is to cure.
I've seen this trend with tourettes first hand as my sons tourettes groups are now having to set up 2 pathways 1 for those like my ds who have the real thing who get anti tick meds and/or talking therapy to help them coap with the symptoms and a 2nd pathway of CBT and group therapy for those with the social contagion who are cured from it usually within 18 months.
Good luck and I hope that your dd gets the correct help soon

Isn’t this just becoming more aware of your own self? It’s part of growing up, not being at the mercy of a bunch of reactions and reflexes, but having some self awareness of our own thoughts and behaviours.

Sometimes we feel a bit more impatient, critical and judgemental of other people. We think mean things then hear ourselves and regret it. Generally if I’m happy and unstressed, other people seem to behave quite reasonably. When I’m under pressure, the world is full of people who walk too slowly, wearing ridiculous trousers and talking too loudly.
To be fair, those are also the days I feel like I should be in charge and run the world because everyone else is incompetent.

When I’m overtired, everything seems like too much trouble and too difficult, and I detach myself a bit from the demands of relationships.

I used to actively summon my party face while I did my make up and hair. Now I do neither make up, hair nor parties unless they’re important!

I’m the same person, but sometimes I bring my cheerleader along and other times she stays home for a rest and my inner accountant take charge.

Now I’m really hoping you’re all going to agree that’s normal…

This is not schizophrenia or bipolar.

DID is a lot more of a popular diagnosis on social media than it is with mental health professionals who rarely diagnose it. It is usually a response to very severe trauma which is not something you mention.

You don’t say what MH issues her brother has which is relevant as family history is important.

I would avoid pathologising this with psychiatric labels at 16. That in itself is harmful. I suspect she feels overlooked with her brothers issues and the house stuff and might want some more of your care and attention. I would attend more to the feelings underlying this than the actual form of words used to express it. She feels mixed up and is struggling with her emotional regulation. Maybe the relationship with the boyfriend is not going well?

I would not be referring her to anyone or taking her to the GP but just checking in with her and making sure I am there for her.

I’m a child and adolescent psychiatrist and I would agree with all of this

What she is describing sounds fairly typical of the adolescent experience - and I would only be concerned if associated with a lot of distress or other concerning behaviours. It sounds nothing like bipolar or schizophrenia

I also see a lot of young people who describe DID type symptoms after watching TikTok - and there is a whole world of videos at #DID on social media, that talk about living as ‘systems’ with the pronouns of we/us

This ^^

Especially related to the changes in the household and throwing in a measure of too much social media use. Teens are not attention seeking but SM is absolutely drowning in self diagnosis and autistic teens are incredibly vulnerable to adopting identities suggested in online forums or by algorithms.

Well intentioned but uninformed healthcare professionals may inadvertently pathologise her thinking, not realising how vulnerable autistic teens are to the power of suggestion. Even their asking questions introduces thoughts that are then difficult to overcome. Introduce the idea that she’s bipolar and you may see more of this behaviour. For the love of god do not mention dissociative disorder or the hugely discredited idea of multiple personality disorders to her.

Take her seriously but also try to get her off SM and help ground her in the physical world. Hiking, sports, volunteering, camping, anything where shes connected to nature and her own body and/or focused on something beyond her own thoughts can help. Spend a day wholly focused on her with just the two of you doing something in nature. Perhaps there are greater MH issues but first try to find a more outdoor solution and see if that helps. Being a teenager is hard. Being an autistic teenager is incredibly hard.

@Hoardasurass I agree with pretty much everything you’re saying especially about the rise in pseudo Tourette’s, but I would caution against getting the OP’s DD into therapy as the first response.

There are so many poor therapists that seeing one could easily exacerbate her symptoms. Perhaps those specialising in Tourette’s can easily recognise the pseudo symptoms and are helpful with CBT, but this DDs thoughts are such that someone might pathologise or misdiagnose.

https://www.theguardian.com/books/2025/mar/12/the-age-of-diagnosis-by-suzanne-osullivan-review-do-no-harm

This bookings controversial. I’m not saying I agree with everything she says but I do think there is something to be said for challenging the idea that everything needs a label

I don’t know -I’m old but remember as a teen being the articulate conscientious DD when posh relatives visited, the witty hilarious one when out with friends,usually drunk, the depressed miserable one in my room if there’d been a fall out or boyfriend broke off, and also never letting people know as you were, imv young and expected to be enjoying yourself.

As for labelling - I think it’s a good thing, having found out I have adhd at 69 -which meant many of the shaming failures in my life were largely due to having that. But by many standards I’ve had a successful life so labels imv are good but don’t mean you cannot have a great life.

I think SM has a horrible effect on lives but don’t think teenagers have changed that much inside since my day.