Have you ever had a gut instinct?

[confusedbydating]

Inspired by another post.

have you ever just had a gut instinct that something was just wrong that you couldn’t put your finger on? Did you or didn’t you act on it? What happened?

one time i had this overwhelming feeling to stop and stay quiet. I did. Next thing I know something heavy fell off a balcony I was meant to be walking under.

have never not trusted my instincts again since.

No i don’t feel better far from it actually, do you? I was going to share mine but feel getting ripped apart by you would finish me off today

I’m sorry she’s making you feel that way. Imo she’s quite boring.

Yes quite! @confusedbydatingsorry for the derail!

No it’s ok! I hope soon you will share your experiences. They’re very interesting to hear.
i became interested in it after my experience. People all say the same thing. I just knew. There’s research there were small signs before but I genuinely don’t know what they were in mine.

Lots of times but the major one was before an earthquake hit. We were living overseas and there were lots of minor tremors almost every day. This one was major and started just before 4am. I was up and moving before I woke up, then the noise started just before the house started shaking. DH woke up when the noise started and I as already out of the bedroom.

I've no idea why you would say that?

I've not mentioned men or misandry and I don't see how it has anything to do with spooky-or-not-spooky incidents.

I couldn't give a fuck about men bemoaning their perfectly intact and plentiful rights.

Oh come on!

How on earth is asking the OP if she wants to tell us more, ripping her apart?

As far as I can see the only aggressive comments have been hers.

Is there some other thread running that I've not seen that explains what on earth is going on here? Because I am lost.

Ah ok. Im so sorry.
this is based on a thread where a man gave the woman the heebee geebies and she was told she was an awful person who hated men and needed serious therapy because she changed direction.
tbe first poster seemed like they were baiting. I wasn’t sure if you were doing the same.
i apologise if you’re not baiting. I find baiting boring. Not contributions

I live by my gut instinct and have lots of examples but one in particular stands out. I was driving past our local bank looking for a parking space. There was one right outside but I had a really bad feeling about parking there, I mean really bad. So I drove further down the road. Shortly afterwards I heard blood curdling screams coming from outside the bank. A woman with the takings from a nearby restaurant had been held up at gun point, exactly by the space I had avoided. The robbers got away with the cash but fortunately the woman was physically unharmed.

Edited to add that I don't live in New York, this was a sleepy little suburb of Bristol.

Driving with my father years ago in my 20's, I just new had a thought about it, that we were going to have an accident.He was driving around next bend another car hit us but not too badly.
I wish I had told him, at the time.

Only driving related! There's a particular stretch of motorway where I envisioned a car flipping and rolling across the carriage way, not every time I drove that way but sometimes. One day it happened and it bounced not very far in front of me. Amazingly he didn't hit anyone else and climbed out of the car unscathed.

I was waiting at a t junction. A lorry was coming and I suddenly thought I can't wait for him to go past, I need to be in front of him. So I did (it was safe to do so). About a quarter of a mile up the road his tyre blew.

Oh! Right. That suddenly does make sense.

That's really horrible. No, I think gut instincts are usually our way of telling us something is 'off'. I would definitely pay attention to them in that situation (but equally, absolutely wouldn't blame anyone who didn't have a gut instinct about a dangerous man, because sometimes you don't).

I was confused because I thought the discussion about whether instinct is 'spooky' (supernatural or going that way) versus whether it's our brains picking up micro-clues about our environment is really fascinating. That's why I was interested in the post about the deer jumping out.

I could tell you were sort of holding something back/there was something unsaid but I thought you were waiting for us all to tell you to spit it out and give more detail about your own experience, because I hadn't seen the original thread and hadn't realised there was that context.

(FWIW, have been a poster on MN since it was fields and used to be very, very, very active on the feminism section; I am the last person who gives a shit about whingy men, or about shaming women for feeling cautious around them.)

So many driving related ones!

Quite frankly I read your post and thought you were just being a bit of a twat. You know the poster was asking for others experiences and you were being purposefully obtuse. If you’re not interested in the thread, go away! I for one think it’s an interesting subject!

Ive been in business for many years and like most business people I get "gut" instincts about deals and buyers. I am seldom wrong in this.

Gut instincts are an important part of our biological make up. Animals act on them all the time. Instinct tells them when to come out and fight, stay quiet, or flee. They dont bother with social norms. As humans we are sometimes reluctant to follow our instinctive feelings because of these social norms. We dont want to hurt someones feelings by, for example, refusiing a date or to lend someone money. So we make polite excuses like "I dont date colleagues" or "Im hard up myself at present."

Experience has taught me that even at the cost of appearing to be rude or hurt someone feelings I have to apply my boundaries, expecially as I have become older and more vulnerable in the physical sense. My first duty is to protect myself because no one else is going t do that for me.

Yes, all the time. One example I can think of- met a guy once who I just knew was dodgy within seconds of meeting him although he came across as very pleasant. He was seeing a friend of mine. Turned out he really was- a horrendous gaslighter, manipulator and abuser.

I personally haven’t had gut feelings about people once about a place (or twice).

I did actually years ago have a bad feeling about one of my brother’s friend’s I met, turned out a few years later he was with the ex gf of another friend of brother’s and he was being violent towards their daughters, enough to get court involved.

Quite similar when our dog was still a pup, he'd been vomiting and had diarrhoea for 2 days, and he couldn't keep anything down. DH wanted to wait until morning to take him to the vets, I KNEW we had to get him to the pet hospital NOW!

By the time we drove there, he'd lost the ability to walk. It was touch and go overnight, but the vet said if we'd waited until morning, he would have died. 😥He's almost 11 now and healthy as ever.

I think it's interesting too.

As I said, I thought the OP was being a bit coy and wanted us to push her for more details; I also found it a bit strange that I and someone else posted saying we didn't think it was spooky but might be to do with processing small things your brain has recognised, and she seemed (to me) to be rejecting that and expecting a different response, when I thought it was quite interesting and would have liked to be able to discuss it.

Even though now I know why there was a funny slant to the thread that I wasn't picking up on (because of the context of the other thread), I think it's a bit off to tell me I should go away, just because what interests me about this subject may be different from what interests you.

I think with illness, sometimes (or some people) can smell something. Not necessarily that you know you're doing it, but there is a real, distinct chemical thing that tells us when someone is very ill.

I often have instincts about people, similar to other PPs. I'm not always right 😆 but I will steer clear of anyone who gives me a strong negative feeling, so no idea if I'd have been right there. I work on the principle that we do notice a lot unconsciously, as it would take too long to process absolutely everything consciously.

I first saw my second husband at a business meeting. A voice in my head said "That man will destroy you if you let him". It wasn't like hearing a voice, more like when you're reading, but calmly forceful. I ignored it, of course - and again, several times, including the day before our wedding. It was correct all along.

My other story is one I've told here before: a perfect example of the life-saving fear that Gavin de Becker talks about. On my travels, a young man sneaked up behind me on a quiet pathway. First I knew about it was the large knife at my throat. And I didn't feel scared, I felt quietly alert. Everything I did - assessing his state of mind, talking to him in a language I didn't know all that well, getting him to remove the knife and making friends with him (he apologised in the end) - was like following instructions from a trusted teacher.

You know it when it happens. And you shouldn't ignore it!

Years ago when I was a mature student I lived on a rough council estate. Several times a man of Asian appearance stopped me outside and asked for a date. (I am white). I have always found Asian men very attractive and have sometimes gone with them when I was abroad. This guy was very good looking but something about his air of swagger and confidence put me off. I said no, I dont go with men I meet in the street. I need to know you socially. That is, I need to know you through work, the uni, as a friend of a friend or something similar. After a few refusals on my part he turned nasty. He called me a snobbish racist bitch and told me "I know where you live". Suddenly a very different side of him elerged. Fortunately I was due to move in a few days time so I carefully avoided the places where I encountered him. I consider that I doidged a bullet.

Guy in our friendship group everyone loved, I got the heebie jeebies from him. I believe he is a psychopath. Told DH, he was like “alright I trust you but I think you’re wrong, we will back away from him”. He is in jail for offences against children and CSAM. I’ve always had a bit of a sixth sense about things like that so generally if someone or something is giving me an icky feeling I avoid it. It’s never led me wrong yet.

Yes, I knew my son’s birth was going to be difficult and it was. And I ignored a feeling about a dangerous person and then had a great deal of stress to deal with as a result.

I thought iPhones would never take off.