Driving - panic attacks on motorway

[CooEeeEldridge]

Has anyone overcome driving anxiety before?

for context I’ve been driving since I was 17, now 43. Been driving all over the country since then, would happily drive 4 hours to a meeting and 4 hours back again in the same day. No issues previously, would happily bomb along constructing pub quizzes, work emails (dictating obvs) saw the driving part of a trip as ‘me time’ where I would play music, form my own concert etc.

from nowhere I’ve developed driving anxiety. I say nowhere maybe the past 4 years it’s crept in to the point where in Dec I had to be picked up by police as I couldn’t leave a lay-by and now I’m in an uber paying £100 each way having to dump my car in a little village as I couldn’t get on a dual carriage way.

I already take propranolol but it’s the brain side now that needs fixing.

it could be a post covid thing? The fear is simply not being able to get off / out. It’s like I feel not tethered to the road and all I want to do is stop. Generally ok on single carriage ways but dual (new thing)and motorways I just want to stop.

has anyone overcome this? As I say if you told my friends this had happened they wouldn’t belive you as I was always the one that would drive, super confident etc. I have aging parents that live 2 hours away so need to overcome this.

Random other angles to consider - our electric car has a tonne of extra checks and balances to make it harder to crash. It even puts the brakes on for you if you're about to crash. Auto hold instead of handbrake etc. I don't know what you currently drive but if it's older a newer car with these backups may send a message of safety to your subconscious.

Look up EMDR therapy though this is mainly for processing trauma that can be traced back to an event. It sounds a bit snake oily but we have found it incredibly effective with a qualified psychiatrist. Much more big gun help than hypnotherapy (though that might also help.)

I have this. For me it started straight after I had my ovaries removed so definitely a hormonal thing. It's horrible! It's the feeling that I can't get off the motorway. This is not helped by new smart motorways with no hard shoulder.

Good luck OP, I would try some of the suggestions above. But don't put too much pressure on yourself as that could be counterproductive.

This is so interesting that other people have the same thing, I thought it was a very weird symptom of my illness. Does suggest to me that it's likely hormonal as my hormones certainly went completely haywire during and after steroids. I wonder why it manifests in such a specific way though. Fear of motorways can hardly have an evolutionary purpose!

It may be that menopausal women are subconsciously aware that their reflexes might be slower and their concentration slightly impaired and this triggers a concern about high speed driving.

This happened to me in my early 40s. Unfortunately I live right next to two busy motorways and to get anywhere other than local driving, including visiting my parents, I have to be able to use the motorway.

A few things helped. I made myself go on it every week for short distances - initially one junction - to build my confidence. If I needed to take a longer journey, DH would come with me whenever possible so I had back-up if I felt too anxious. I used rescue remedy.

I don't know for sure if it also helped but I started taking the mini-pill which helped with a lot of my other perimenopausal symptoms so may have contributed to easing my anxiety. Anyway, I did regain my confidence at using the motorway.

I am literally sitting in a service station, waiting for my husband to rescue me. I am 2 hours drive from home and he has had to get 2 trains and an Uber because I'm paralysed with fear at the thought of getting back onto thd M4!!
I drive hundreds of miles a week for work but in the last year , the anxiety has been creeping in and I wish I had seen the GP before I ended up endangering myself on a very busy motorway.

I think it was the fear of being trapped, I felt disconnected from my limbs, I just was not in control and was absolutely traumatised. I had to drive for 12 miles in this complete state of panic, at 40 mph with everyone beeping at me, until I finally saw the exit that I'm sitting at now.
I definitely think it is my hormones, I've just turned 45.
I feel absolutely wretched now but your post has helped me feel like I'm not alone!
I'll definitely be making a Dr app first thing!

You poor thing, it’s utterly terrifying isn’t it when the panic hits, I hope you manage to get through it, could you get home on the A roads?

Luckily when my husband gets here, he can drive us back. It woukd havd taken 6 hours on the A roads and I'm not in the right frame of mind for that :(

I overcame it in my 20s /early 30s.

I learned to drive at 26 but wasn't confident then I drove back with a hangover about an hour and got so anxious I had to stop at a service station for about 2 hours to calm down.

I then left motorway driving but one Christmas tried to drive about 3 hours and got so terrified like you of not being able to stop and being trapped.

After that I wouldn't motorway drive. My mum won't drive on motorways so I caught being scared from her. Eventually I had a baby and had to go on my local ring road more frequently . I also drove to my parents about an hour. I started to get more confident.

I don't love long drives on the motorway now but am OK with shorter journeys of up to 2.5 hours and I've driven for 3 hours plus down to Cornwall when dh was ill which was really good for me.

Recommend getting nlp or hypnotherapy and getting your confidence back up on dual carriageways and then easier local motorways with frequent junctions.

My mum had this (her trigger was driving over bridges) and when she went to the GP she found out she had hypothyroidism. There may also have been other hormones at play (she was probably in her 40s by then). Eventually she also had CBT which helped.

Hi OP,

sorry you’re experiencing this.

i went through the same years ago, having been “the” motorway driver for decades.

ended up being escalators etc too - anything I had limited control over and ‘couldn’t get off’.

i had driving therapy -‘it wasn’t actually the driving at all that was the problem, that was just the way it manifested.

but now, 15 years later, I’m the one who drives anywhere and everywhere again, so pls don’t give up finding a solution.

for me, it turning out to never be the driving that was the problem, but the anxiety in the life around it.

Have/had the exact same thing. You really do need to keep attempting it and taking the propronanol. Sertraline has really helped me too. It’s fucking awful. I don’t know where mine came from either but it’s definitely linked to the feeling of not being able to escape. Mine is a rush of panic x

I emphasise with you entirely, @LisaMarie198419

However awful you felt, you stayed in control and got to a safe place. Well done 👏👏

there’s likely other things going on in your world that are causing pressure and anxiety. driving is just an area where there anxiety is able to surface.

I’ve been there and know how awful it is. You’re never a danger but it’s highly stressful,

GP is a good start. I did driving therapy and the problems are back to being a distant bad memory for me now.

I have become exactly the same. It’s a side effect of perimenopause…. It’s so so so irritating!! I was also totally fine bombing about on motorways now cannot contemplate it :/ Sorry I don’t have advice to get over as I still can bring myself to get back on a motorway. Ok on single track only …

wow I could have written this. Same age, very confident my whole life, driven all over the UK and abroad. Motorway anxiety has crept in over the past several years. I’m almost certain it’s hormonal as it’s not all the time but when it hits I feel so scared and really paranoid that I’m going to pass out (I obviously never have). It stops the second I get off the motorway or if I drive at about 60 in the slow lane I feel a bit calmer so that’s how I manage it.

I think mine started when my son was a baby. I had some hideous motorway journeys with him screaming his head off and my anxiety was sky high at the time due to PND.

I know my anxiety is worse with hormone fluctuations so I’m sure it’s that.

Hypnosis is brilliant at curing issues like this.

You need someone you feel comfortable with and preferably comes recommended as some hypnotists are a bit crap.

Yes, I get it and have done one and off for the last 8 years or so maybe. I’m mid 40’s. Worse when I’m tired.
I’m not anxious generally.

I also have intrusive thoughts of really, really wanting to wrench the wheel and veer into the central barrier!

I refuse to allow it to stop me.

I breathe, talk to myself, tap areas of my body to calm myself, concentrate on singing along to the radio, slow to 55 if I need and tell myself I’m safe.

If I allow myself to stop while it’s happening, that will be it, I feel. So I push through.

There have been times my vision has gone to a tiny tunnel, but it does pass……..

With me it started after I had children.

Hypnotherapy helped but I still can’t drive in the dark any more.

I was always a really confident and competent driver, both on and off road, until the perimenopause hit me. Huge amounts of anxiety and panic attacks with hot sweats when faced with 'complicated' roundabouts or junctions, getting confused with navigation, struggling to remember directions to places I'd driven to numerous times before, having to slow down more and make much more of a conscious effort to focus on what I was doing. HRT has been a lifesaver!

Women’s Hour did a segment on this phenomenon, which I found very interesting and I recall them discussing strategies and therapies for resolving it:

https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/m002jsbx

@Eyesopenwideawake might be able to help you. She's often on here so hope she sees this.

I had the same experience as others. Hit perimenopause and went from comfortably driving three hundred miles along multiple motorways to not even being able to drive a mile on 30mph roads.
CBT and HRT helped me to get back driving.

I would say to everyone - don’t give up and accept it as inevitable.

for me, the anxiety was related to life circumstances.

for others, it might be hormonal, or related to an incident or accident.

whatever the reason - being able to use the motorway to take yourself where you want or need to go is so powerful, so valuable, so freeing.

don’t give it up.

I would say it's 99.9% certain that this is due to your hormones. At your age, even if you're having very regular periods, then it's highly likely you are perimenopausal.

Sadly, I know far more about the perimenopause and the subsequent anxiety symptoms than every medical professional I've ever spoken to, bar one.

this is the driving therapist I used to help me get back to myself.

https://carolcsharptherapy.co.uk/driving-rehabilitation.html