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Does anybody long for a simpler life?

36 replies

sxcizme3010 · 20/06/2025 18:00

Im becoming strangely nostalgic.. Starting to want a slower pace of life... Chickens in the garden, logs on the burner... Go back to a time where there was no Internet, social media etc.. Where you could walk into a market and buy all your groceries, pay with cash and head on home to cook a delightful meal for your family..

I know its a rose tinted glasses outlook as some modern advances are hugely beneficial but I do long for a simpler time.. a more fulfilling life maybe.

Anybody feel the same? Or am I heading for that midlife crisis 😹

OP posts:
notanarchaeologist · 20/06/2025 19:57

Perhaps a silly question but do you actively need to be present in the work WhatsApps? Could you be in the group but keep it in the 'locked' part, then only check it periodically so you can filter the bs?

blueshoes · 20/06/2025 19:58

Kelim · 20/06/2025 19:53

Not everybody is the same. We're happy as we are.

I am sure you all are.

notanarchaeologist · 20/06/2025 20:05

@Kelim precisely!

And if teens are missing the faster pace then they can chase that when they're adults. I grew up in a small market town, I was pretty happy there mostly. I'd get the train to the city with my mates every now and again but largely there was enough going on on. Then I went to uni in the city I'm now based, moved around a bit after graduating, travelled a lot, moved back here to settle down. Now we're mid-way through primary and I'm thinking back to how much safer my market town felt, how people knowing you and looking out for you even in teenage years isn't the worst thing, how my first job was with a family friend etc. Stuff I doubt would be so common in the big smoke. I think the slower pace will be enriching for the children too, life here can be so stimulating. Rest and quiet is good for the soul.

As I say I may find I'm romanticising a lot, but growing up rural and then living the urban life as a young adult wasn't awful for me, and now as a mum I'm returning to what I know. Maybe DC will be the same, maybe not 💁be up to them soon enough, and in the meantime I can hang out with the chickens if the kids start moaning too much 🤣

OutandAboutMum1821 · 20/06/2025 20:09

YANBU. What you described sounds lovely! I’ve simplified my life a lot, but would love to go further, e.g. your description of burning a fire, having animals, definitely getting rid of the internet. I’m sold!

Mbjf · 20/06/2025 20:33

This is my first ever post on MN! I just wanted to suggest you read (or listen to, she narrates it herself on audible) A year of living simply, by Kate Humble. I couldn't quite put my finger on what I was missing or longing for these days, but her book is a really wonderful read on, well, exactly what people in this thread are talking about. She talks about lots of people she's met over the years who have chosen a different route in life and are much happier for it. I've read it twice, it gives me warm feelings and exciting ideas!

PollyCreo · 20/06/2025 20:47

I had a midlife crisis 20 years ago and left the UK for a simpler life, here's where I spent my morning:

greencartbluecart · 20/06/2025 20:49

Chickens - id never manage to keep them alive without the internet !

much of what you want is achievable however - a lot of it is mindset - the need to see yourself as busy to think your life is valuable and has meaning

what is stoppping you from nipping to the market ( or if you live where there isn’t one) the shops and the cooking a good family meal ?

you have to set your own pace and priorities on life

MadamCholetsbonnet · 20/06/2025 20:50

Just delete your SM. I did and it’s so freeing.

YourOpalKoala · 20/06/2025 20:54

Yes, my life is far more hectic now than it was before.

ayvasili · 20/06/2025 21:04

The simple life takes work! We have a log burner, chickens and a vegetable patch. You have to water the vegetable patch and hunt the vegetables every day to make sure they don't over grow-corgettes I'm looking at you, or suddenly go to seed -that will be the herbs.
Chickens need feeding and watering, and sometimes if we fail to collect the eggs promptly enough, the chickens will start to eat them!
Hubby is currently teaching himself how to build a shed, and is doing and excellent job slowly but surely at the weekends. He is looking forward to retirement, when he can Potter around just tending the veggies and chickens and chilling out.

Kids are now young adults and will hopefully be leaving the nest in the next couple of years, and then it will be the two of us enjoying our house, the sun, and the sea 15 minutes down the road.

BatchCookBabe · 20/06/2025 22:37

Yes, as a pp said, my life is like this. I have a cushy WFH job - 2 days a week, (16 hours,) I live in a tiny village with 350-ish people surrounded by a dozen or so farms, the market town near me is 3.5 miles away, and I have countryside all around me, the river, the canal, and woodlands. No children at home (flew the nest a decade ago,) and there are lots of lovely quirky old fashioned shops in the market town. and a twice weekly market with about 50 stalls. No parents alive (or parents in law) so no having to look after them. Community in the village is lovely.

I do sometimes have nostalgia for the 1980s and 1990s, (I was in my teens, 20s, and early 30s then...) but really, at the time it wasn't that easy... My folks were quite poor, I was pushed out to work in a factory at 16, I hated my job, some of the women were bullies, and bills and electrical goods and clothes and shoes etc were high. I was also bullied at school.

The 1990s I had my 2 amazing DC - but me and DH never had any surplus money and were always chasing our tails, and trying to cope with 15% interest rates on our mortgage that ate up half our joint income. Our neighbours in the first house we bought were cunts and drove us out of our house with their noise. (The neighbours when we moved in were fab, but after a year they left.) We only stuck these vile neighbours for 7-8 months then we sold up. (To a private landlord who intended to rent it out, I hope they had some horrific neighbours!) We had some tough times overall...

My (corporate) job in the 1990s and noughties was demanding too, and we were always expected to aim higher, and women were expected to 'have it all!' And we were constantly frazzled! I did go part time - 3.5 days a week when my DC came along, but they made sure I had 4.5 days work in those 3.5 days. (I did 3 days one week, 4 the next etc...)

The 1980s holds some happy memories as well, especially of going on holidays with mates, and having some laughs in the first office job I had after retraining in admin and secretarial. (When I was 20.) Also some lovely memories of nightclubbing with friends, living in a flat in London with my best mate, (for a year!) and clubbing in London, and also backpacking across Europe. Loved the street parties in the 1980s (and 1970s too) for Royal stuff and World cup stuff, and the fact that everyone knew everyone, and I loved going to the pub every weekend and seeing 30-40 people I knew.

And the 1990s holds some happy memories of life with my 2 DC when they were small, and I was the centre of their universe, and me and DH and them went to Disneyland Paris, and New York, and Italy, and Germany, and Spain, and France, and Greece, and The Netherlands, and Belgium. And we had lots of beach days and caravan holidays in Wales, and picnics and lots of fun in the garden and the local park! Some lovely Christmases with them as children too. (And lovely Christmases of my own as a child and also caravan holidays with my folks and brother in the 1970s.)

But do I want that time back? Nah, I like the internet, and my laptop, and Netflix, and being able to stream things, and my smartphone, and being able to watch almost anything at anytime (on youtube) and pretty much having instant contact with my 2 DC no matter where they are. (They live 15-20 miles away.)

I like being able to do things online too, like taxing the car, banking, paying my council tax, sorting our insurance, booking GP appointments, ordering prescriptions and getting them from the pharmacy 3 days later without having to go to the GP to drop the repeat prescription off, then go pick it up 2 days later, then go to the pharmacy and wait half hour for it to be done, and sometimes have to go back if they don't have all my meds!!! Love ordering shopping online too, and finding stuff instantly on Ebay and Amazon that I would previously have had to to spend weeks, and lots of time and petrol money trawling the shops for!

And I enjoy communicating with people on social media, and being able to chat to friends and family 100s (even 1000s) of miles away. And I love being able to instantly share photos, instead of taking them, and waiting for weeks to finish the film, then having to get it developed, and then get extra copies for people, and then having to post them! I also like having 500 songs on a little MP3 player or ipod, player to sit in the garden with (or go on a walk with!)

Will just keep the nice memories! (And try and push the not so nice ones to the back of my mind!)

What you have @sxcizme3010 is hiraeth...

Does anybody long for a simpler life?
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