Ice breakers - I hate them with every fibre of my soul but have been asked to organise two for Friday

[catin8oots]

9 colleagues. 4 new, never met before. All women if that's relevant?

Please help me before I quit my job 😀

@HeronWing they had been playing with them on a break a little too... enthusiastically.

They were very apologetic and sweet.

I do lots of group work normally but couldn't with them since they were very worried about losing face or looking stupid. It was a lot of fun!

They were baby gang members in a program so not the scarier members.

If they have to answer questions, I’d be careful to give them a good set to choose from rather than them all having to answer the same ones. For example you liked the suggestion ‘Share your highlight of the year so far’ from another poster … it’s a great question, but if you’ve had a really awful year for various reasons, it could be embarrassing to have a seemingly low key ‘highlight’. Also some people may not like to admit if they don’t have a hobby etc, though on the face of it it’s another really good one as people talk easiest about things they are enthusiastic about. So I’d have a reasonably sized set of questions to choose from.

Also, as an introvert who HATED these things, and stressed about them for days ahead, here’s something that helped me, as my biggest anxiety was around the ‘creeping death’ feeling as people took it in turns to say something in the first whole group session. I wouldn’t be able to focus on what they were saying … just dreading it being my turn and all those eyes switching to staring at me 👀 … terrifying !! I tried to use my voice informally in the room as much as possible, before things officially started e.g making a general comment about the weather, the traffic etc. Usually someone would respond and I could engage in small chat, and it made me feel easier, a lot better than not knowing anyone and staying quiet until I had to say my ‘piece’. So as the groups you’re planning include some completely new people, I’d have an exercise to pair them up initially, with whatever excuse to chat, before then having a whole group session where people are put on the spot.

I agree with @Whosmakingdinner get people in smallish groups first, don't do the creeping death around the table. I'm shy and actually like ice breakers, but absolutely hate the creeping death version as I'm a bag of nerves by the time it gets to me.

Still traumatised by the ice breaker where we had to physically imitate whichever weather the trainer shouted out

a BIG storm

a VERY sunny day

the rain on leaves

A great icebreaker would be a group discussion on what people think of icebreakers.

I detest ice breakers. I think most people do! Why not twist it around, ask people to tell everyone about the silliest ice breaker they’ve ever done. It will get people talking as any other ice breaker would, but might be amusing. Or ask, if you could be anywhere in the world right now where would you be and what would you be doing?

I'm a learning designer. In any group you will inevitably have a section of participants who don't want to do this kind of exercise. But I would argue that there can be a difference between what a group of people want and what they need. Good, simple icebreakers tend to work. They get people speaking to each other, ready to interact and communicate. It's like doing your stretches before going to the gym or for a run (not everyone wants to go to the gym or for a run either, but they might need to).

Avoid 'creeping death' at any costs. For some of us, being told you're going to have to speak in front of an audience, without any kind of preparation and reveal things about yourself, can be excruciating. A simple work round is to split people into pairs and ask them to introduce themselves to each other and share some simple questions (e.g. where did you travel from? why are you here? etc), then, when you bring the whole group back, each pair introduces each other, rather than themselves, which removes a lot of the awkwardness.

Whatever you go for, keep it simple and keep it swift. And tell the group why you're doing it! If you give people a clear rationale for an exercise, they are much more likely to embrace it.

I detest ice breakers. I think most people do! Why not twist it around, ask people to tell everyone about the silliest ice breaker they’ve ever done. It will get people talking as any other ice breaker would, but might be amusing.

I really like this idea! To avoid people feeling put on the spot, I'd kick off the session with a humorous presentation of the worst icebreakers ever (this thread has some great examples!). Then ask everyone which of these icebreakers they'd hate the most, and why. Once everyone's warmed up, I'd put them into pairs to learn a few things about each other, and then everyone introduces their partner to the group.

That’s a good one 😆

The best ice breaker I have ever done, and one that didn't make me want to run screaming from the room, was where chocolates, tubs of pringles etc were given to each person. Then a story was read. Every time the story said the word "right" we had to pass our chocolate right, and every time the story said "left" we had to pass it left. At the end of the story you got the treat you were holding (obviously all in wrappers).

The story was written quite cleverly, sort of
"Susie woke up and left her bed, heading right for the bathroom. She felt like a right idiot when she realised she had left her glasses on her bedside table. 'Right,' she chided herself 'no more silliness. You can quit that right now!"

Etc.
If I were ever tasked with this role that is the one I would use.