How easy or difficult is it to get an elderly person into a care home with no private funding

[Bellson]

DM is 91 and had a stroke about 2 years ago. Since then her quality of life has deteriorated a lot. She used to be independent and active and now needs me a lot more.

I'm her only DC. She lives independent in a council flat about ten minutes walk from me. We both live in very small flats. She has no savings and no property to sell. I am her carer but since coming out of hospital she has carers who visit her at home twice a day as well. I take her out for lunch once or twice a week and then to doctors appointments and pop in most days to check on her or take shopping.

I think she would benefit from going into a care home for company and stimulation. Her medical care needs are being met by me and the carers and GPs etc but it's a huge strain and worry on me. Often she will call me distressed and she doesn't like living on her own.

There is a really nice care home near us which I tried to get her in but it's so expensive. I have gone to her GP and he wrote a letter recommending that she go into a care home but that was weeks ago and nothing has happened. I'm wondering if it's because we can't fund it it isn't going to be a priority. What I'm wondering is from people in the know what is the threshold for a social worker deciding that someone qualifies for a place in a care home?

(also the reality is that because of the above, most people in the council funded care home would probably not be good company for her anyway due to the intensity of their needs, dementia etc).
They are generally not pleasant places, keep her at home as long as possible.

She doesn't sound like she needs residential care so I would say no chance at all. Have you considered a middle option of supported living?
That would be in her own flat in a complex. We have had several housing 21 complexes around our area built on what we're local authority residential homes. They are very nice, very expensive for those with funds, and can be supported with housing benefit. Mix of med, high and low care needs makes for a livelier environment. Cafe and hairdressers on site
I'd look for something similar in your area

I agree with those who say the council are not going to fund a care home placement on the grounds of needing 'company and stimulation'. They would only move her to a care home if her care needs are not being met at home.

In terms of 'company' in a care home, I agree the residents don't interact very much as they are generally too unwell - that's why they are there. But the main benefit is that there is always a carer there to help the person when they need it, unlike the current situation at home. That is what you need to focus on, the fact your mum has significant periods alone and needs supervision 24/7, which you cannot provide.

Op sheltered housing is probably a better option. Still her own space but people around and community events going on.

This is why it annoys me when people moan that they are expected to pay for their own care homes if they have capital, or savings, claiming that if they'd not bothered saving or paying a mortgage 'the council will pay for everything'.
It really pisses me off, that people don't understand the reality, it's always better to have money behind you.
Anyway, sorry slight derail.
Hope you get the advice you need.

@MichaelAndEagle At £5,500 a month, you need to hope it doesn’t run out! Not sure you realise how much it costs. People paying subsidise those who don’t pay.

My mother pays less than that (about £4500) but yes the money does run out quickly. But because she was able to self fund care it meant as her LPA I could choose the care home I wanted, at the right time for her. After several years her money did run out and the council now fund her in the same placement, so there was a huge benefit in being able to make the initial choice. But that is a side argument and unfortunately doesn't help the OP.

Op does you mother want to go into a home?
I'd have thought many elderly people would rather keep their independence than to be in a home.

Being independent can be lonely though. We found DMs friends and relatives died. There is a diminishing pool of people to talk to and things you can do. I’d investigate day centres and other activities but being lonely is hard. Quite a few people were ok to talk to in DMs home.

Yes living alone can be lonely but I think their are other options rather than a home, day centres, sheltered housing etc.

Particularly if the person is independent enough to be able to potter round the house.

It may depend on the area. There is a shortage of places where I live. It took 2 years on a waiting list to get my Dad into a funded care home.

She will have to her care needs assessed by a social worker.
She will only be entitled to funding if she actually needs a care home, based on her assessed care needs.

If care is funded by the council then you can't choose a more expensive option

Most homes take both private and council funded. Its only the really fancy ones that are 100% private.

If council funded you still have a choice. They dont just stick you anywhere.