Wedding tips to ensure the day goes smoothly and everyone has a great time.

[FknOmniShambles]

I'm getting married next weekend and had a few guests cancelling so I'm feeling a bit jittery about the day. We've gone for low key (registry office/pub) but many guests are travelling g quite far, so we really want it to be an enjoyable day.
Could anyone give tips from their own experiences that made the day go really well, or things to avoid? Anything at all much appreciated!

I went to a family wedding last weekend. Stunning 14th century venue, absolutely astounding dress, 6 bridesmaids. And a super relaxed day, the bride didn’t stress about anything. The photographer was a friend of the couple as was the DJ. After the ceremony when it came to photos, the bride said “20 minutes of photos max because I want to drink and party with everyone”. The bride and groom wanted a day of fun and they absolutely got that, it was an amazing day. So my biggest tip, relax and enjoy.

Make an active resolution now that if things go wrong it doesn't matter and you may well look back on the oops moments fondly.

Relax.

Talk to people - a surprising number don't want to bother the B&G because they think they'll have other people they'd rather talk to, so break through that. Also, as you have 2 families who don't know each other well or at all, plus separate groups of friends, it can be satisfying to get people mingling (not shove them right out of their comfort zone, but mixing in a friendly way). I had a blast with my niece's new DH's aunt as a result of a intro like that "did you know you overlapped at XYZ university?" It was a lovely sense of community, and I think worth nudging along. At the end of the day, the people matter more than the trappings

(You can't do much about this now, but plenty to drink, at sensible bar prices; food in good quantities at normal mealtimes).

Put money behind the bar for drinks. Have a decent selection of non-alcoholic drinks available.
Nominate someone for the venue to speak to in case of questions/problems. In our case it was my PIL as they knew the restaurant.
Have a small bag with deodrant, hand cream, tissues etc nearby/with your bm.

To add, the bride realised that her end of aisle candle and flower arrangements would get swept away by her gown and she said “just tell everyone to shove them under the chairs”. She let go of any stress. The timings were all great, drink flowing all day and lots of different places to sit and relax inside and out

So helpful thanks and definitely some common themes coming through, e.g no lengthy photo shoots and ensuring we talk to everyone, etc. Much appreciated!

The best wedding we ever went to (not ours!) went s as long the lines of:

2.30pm - church
3.30 pm - big photos
4 pm - afternoon tea in village hall whilst b&g did more specific photos
4.30 b&g arrived, had their tea
5pm - speeches
Mingling, kids entertainer
6pm ceilidh
6.45 Bufffet
7.30 more ceilidh

Drinking and dancing until about 10-11pm

Those may not have been the exact timings, but something along those lines. The kids all had little age appropriate activity packs at their seats - colouring, puzzles, playdoh, Lego, little dress up doll. Being a village hall, it also had a playground outside.

Accept that something won’t go to plan. Possibly lots won’t go to plan. But so what? It doesn’t ruin anything. It doesn’t matter. You and your DH will still have exchanged vows and will be married. And that really is the only thing that does matter.

Also, take ten minutes, just you and your DH, where you can just sit and breathe together and process what has just happened and be happy together. It goes so quickly the day will be a blur, so it’s worth trying to remember the little things.

It will be perfect. Even if it’s not perfect, it will be perfect. Congratulations and have a wonderful day.

Enough food and drink, enough space so everyone can sit down!
No massive gap between ceremony and meal

Things I thought helped from a recent family wedding:

If you have children attending you could have something at their place at the table to keep them amused, a Polly pocket with a small colouring book, pack of crayons, a little fidget toy, pack of haribo are some ideas it really helps keeps wee ones amused while waiting around for meals to be served and during speeches etc.

Also the mother of the groom had made up a wee basket of toiletries to put in the female toilet which everyone thought was a great idea, it had deodorants, hairspray, dry shampoo, a hairbrush, tissues, make up wipes, plasters etc I thought it was a lovely idea.

And yea try to get to speak to everyone even if it's just for a moment for them to congratulate you and for you to thank them for coming.

Hope you both have a wonderful day xx

Do the speeches after the meal. It’s a much more pleasant atmosphere when people have been fed and have had a few drinks as opposed to sitting there thinking “hurry up so I can have my dinner”.

Every wedding I’ve ever been to has had the speeches after the meal apart from one in Canada where the speeches were interspersed with the courses.

Make sure you eat earlier in the day or the first glass of fizz and you'll be legless! If you're going to be busy getting hair & make up done then plan ahead then order some sandwich platters from M&S, get a local sandwich shop to deliver or plan an UberEats type delivery mid morning.

Don't let the speeches go on too long.
Short and sweet is the way.

Nobody at all cares what the chairs look like
No one will remember your flowers.
You only really need a few photos.
Colour themes, playlists, sweet carts, photo booths, doves, balloons with embossed initials etc are really not important.
You can wear the same dress/shoes/bag etc to more than one wedding.

Other than the wedding with the "perfect schedule" I mentioned above, the only ones that are memorable are where food and drink was insufficient - not in a greedy way, just in a "we've come all this way and we've been standing around for hours" way.

Don’t forget decent music…..

Lots of food
Lots of drink
No waiting around

I know brides who are getting married like to think about decor, favours, seating plans etc but I promise, guests do not give a flying monkeys about that stuff.

Just have a great time with your husband and guests.

If people help you out do you a favour, thank them on the day and thank them after the event too. Notice what they have done for you.

My SIL had our elderly aunty make a cake for the kids. Aunty made one of those optical
illusion rainbow cakes. It was brilliant. Cake was plonked down and was barely eaten. Aunty was upset as no thanks was given the kids didn’t know it was for them. Aunty was unable to attend evening party.

seems daft, but had one of the wedding party taken one picture with some kids digging in and that had been texted across saying- cake is amazing thank you so much. Would have meant the world to old aunty.

This

We didn't have a seating plan. People sat pretty much how we would have sat them anyway, because you know, friends flock together, cousins who've fallen out avoid each other anyway, and anyone's ex will perfectly well know that their ex is there, whether you try to seperate them or not.