Disability lanyards

[4121T]

My mum, being well-meaning and I somewhat agree, suggested that I get an "I have autism" lanyard (or similar) for my son. He is 4. Non verbal. Still in nappies. He is happy and adorable but can be loud or do things which may not be the norm. It's at these points where she feels it might be worthwhile having one to alert people that he's not being naughty and me a shit parent but actually his behaviours are due to his condition/disability.

However, as much as I agree it would be helpful for people to magically know he is autistic, I hate the idea of doing it. I feel he is too young still. But I don't know. How would other people feel either seeing my son or if your son/daughter was disabled in the same or similar way. Ironically my son has an NHS staff style lanyard which currently goes everywhere with us but not worn. It's currently his favourite "toy".

I work in the travel industry and find that the sunflower lanyards are often abused by people who don't need them to bypass the queues at security and passport control! Its sad and awful that they do this because many of my colleagues do not now take it seriously that the wearer has a hidden disability!

The sunflower lanyard isn't going to change much. Tolerant people will mostly realise there are additional needs and continue to be tolerant. Non tolerant people will still be the same.

Where we find the lanyard useful is situations where a little bit of additional customer support might be helpful. We mainly use it in airports as staff generally are excellent at spotting lanyards and often discreetly guide you to quieter areas to wait or queue. A busy train station is also a good place to wear one. Normal day to day life though we have our established coping methods so are ok without.

My DD is older than yours though. It is worth having one though even for occasional use.

my son used to wear one, and tbh it did help. He does have a sunflower one as well, but we used to use one with ASD/ND symbols on.. it had a purpose too, he had a sensory thing on it that he needed with him.

Worth thinking about whether it's a good idea just practically from a safety perspective to put anything around his neck. If he is quite an active child it could catch on something.

My first thought was strangulation.

Autism is such a broad diagnosis it’s basically developmental delay in one or more areas of the brain and the cause should be investigated because more and more children have it. It sounds like it’s visible to others that your child is behind they’ll see he’s in baby pants still and observe his behaviours and know he isn’t like other children. Lanyards are more for adults or older autistic children who are higher functioning and it’s less obvious

Surely they have safety "snap apart" fastenings?

You can get wristbands. But I guess you may have the same issue with it catching?

I find most people ignore them. Oh wait, most people can't see a mobility cane

Pretty much this.

We have a sunflower badge when flying but otherwise it’s a “no” from me. I would however recommend writing on your son’s car seat his name and dx and who to call in an emergency should you ever have a crash it might help. The arseholes are still arseholes whatever you do. Go out as much as possible and learn how to manage different places while he’s still little and cute, people are more forgiving at that stage.

I have a DS with autism, and there is a lot of ADHD in my family.

Its not something to hide, it is what it is - all of these issues need to be talked about. They're not "wrong" or "not normal" they have additonal needs, be it quieter areas, managing expectations etc

Like a PP said - if they needed a wheelchair, they'd use it.

For my DS if he wants to wear his lanyard, then he can.
For a 4 year old, I'd encourage him to wear it.

Not everyone who wears ear defenders is ND

I should also point out that perhaps part of the reason I'm so open about wearing lanyards is so that my children feel empowered to wear them and get accommodations if needed.

I’m sad to see the post that some workers now believe that people are wearing them just to get the accommodations without being disabled. I'm aware that this may happen with a few people but to judge everybody by that standard is pretty disappointing and I'd suggest that employers need to be mindful in instructing their staff that this really isn't the case. After all, unless you've seen me have a complete meltdown, you wouldn't think I was disabled either to look at me as I try everything I can to keep calm in places that stress me out. The accommodations I am given allow me to travel without tipping over the edge.

They do.