Tell us something awful you did as a kid.

[Friedchickenrocks]

Aged about 8 our grandad was staying with us and I hid his glasses. Nobody thought it was me but he knew. He was literally almost blind for a week and even went poking with his walking stick down the loo. "I know it's her. I just know it, little bitch" Eventually they magically re-appeared on the sideboard. I never did own up and my mum never thought it could possibly be her blue eyed girl.

Poor girl

I chewed the foot of Janey Carpenter’s Sindy doll on the 4th August 1973.

It was a right state, I’d taken the toes almost off. It was her 9th birthday present.

My mother gave me a skelping.

Not to my knowledge. I doubt they mentioned anything to my mum either, because she’d have had us sussed immediately! We were lucky that they used to have cardboard lids that popped out. Today’s kids would never know the pleasure as they’re all glued shut now. 😂

This reminded me of when my best friend and I were about 14 and would play her Donna Summer album on 16 RPM instead of 33 RPM.,in particular,Love to love you baby. It had a lot of moaning and groaning on it,and played at a slower speed,sounded like a cow mooing. My friend and I would be pissing ourselves laughing.

How do we get this moved to Classics?

Bullies all being proud of being bullies. Weird.

I once caught my MIL doing the same thing.😱

mine are with two paternal Aunts...Mary & Hilda who stayed with us seperatly in 1970s . Mary was a right nosey bugger so I wrote a letter and on the envelope it said "DO NOT OPEN". I placed this on the dressing table in my parents room and hid under their bed to watch. Mary went to the lavvy and then went into my parent bedroom to poke and pry. Sure enough she opened the envelope and the letter said "YOU ARE A NOSEY OLD COW" she never saif anything though

Hilda had an enormous amount of sweets in her suitcase and I scoffed nearly everyone of them...

I used to do this. We had a cleaner and my mum had my sister but was too lazy to look after her, so the cleaner would take my sister on walks around the village. I was 7 years old and friends with cleaners daughter, who came over everyday of summer and was my age.

On said walks the cleaner would stand there with the pram and watch us cut all the flowers, we would literally go out with a plastic bag and scissors.

Sometimes just to take a handful of rose petals from each rose to make a necklace from.

I didn't know it was bad necessarily but how irresponsible of my mum and the cleaner. Sums up my dysfunctional childhood and terrible parents who I loathe.

People need to take into consideration that children don't have fully developed adult brains. Young children, between the ages of 3 and 12 are very 'reward' driven because their nucleus accumbens (dopamine rich) is very active. This is the 'buzz' part of the brain. It typically is triggered during learning based rewards (for example: merits at school for hard work, therefore the child feels motivated to go on and earn more) however, being dopamine rich, the nucleus accumbens can also play a role in childhood behaviour; I.E, doing something deemed by an adult as naughty or bad, creates a buzz which the child finds thrilling. (Anyone ever been told no and done it anyway for the rush?)

Very young children 2-6 (ish) will have no concept that their actions are causing harm.

Beyond 12 to the age of 22-23 the Amygdala is the most triggered part of a young person/ teenagers brain. The Amygdala is purely emotional. It has no to very little rationality therefore logic and common sense often go out the window (which explains why teenagers and young adults are willing to take bigger risks and why emotional fallout are common in the teen years) It also means that from between these ages children and young people are more prone to stupid decisions and have an underdeveloped ability to reason or rationalise, which leads to intense emotional outbursts.

From 25 onwards our brains now think using the prefrontal cortex. The rational part of our brain. Where we process logic, understanding of consequences and reasoning. As adults we can read through this thread and see how shocking our childhood behaviour can be because we have the ability to shift point of view and rationalise. As a child, that ability simply isn't there because the brain isn't developed enough.

When I was a kid, we had one of those extendable dining tables - the two halves could be pulled apart and a middle section could be lifted up to make the table bigger. We didn't entertain very often, so it was usually in the unextended position.
When not being used, the middle section would be folded under the table like a shelf.
Anyway, when I was about 6 or so, my parents, in an attempt to get my brother and I to finish our dinners properly, said that we wouldn't get dessert if we didn't at least try to clear our plates. Unfortunately I took this to heart. Mum used to plate up very generous portions which were a bit much for me at that age. So instead of just asking Mum if I could please have slightly smaller dinners, like a normal person, I started taking bits of food off my dinner plate and stashing it on the 'shelf' under the table when no one was looking, like a little squirrel, so it would look like I'd eaten all my dinner. This went on for quite a while with a mounting pile of food gathering underneath the table.

To this day I don't have the slightest idea what I was thinking or why I thought this was a clever hiding place that no one would ever discover. Needless to say we had guests over for dinner one day and my Dad extended the table only to reveal all this manky food rising up out of nowhere. I seem to recall they weren't terribly happy with me at the time, but it made sense to me. I was just scared I wouldn't get any custard! It was over 30 years ago and ocasionally someone in my family will still mention it for a laugh. 😂

On long journeys, my brother and I used to kneel on the back car seat (no back seatbelts in the 70s) and flick two fingers at lorry drivers behind us. One was smoking, and as he opened his mouth to swear at us the lit fag fell out of his mouth, he writhed around probably trying to put it out.
I put a sprig of holly in my brother's bed, an idea I got from an Enid Blyton book (evil weird writer). He screamed and I had to bribe him with 10p to shut up and not dob me in.
Teachers joined a different lunch table each day. Loosened the salt cellar lid so Miss Barnes poured the entire contents on her spam fritter, creamed potatoes and mixed veg.
My brother and I found a tin of toffees on top of a kitchen cupboard. We unwrapped and ate the toffees, then wrapped chunks of foam of foam from the settee that we'd cut off with scissors in the toffee papers.
I dropped hairgrips into the holes on the back and sides of the TV (you'll only know what I mean if you're in your 50s, TVs were huge in the 70 and 80s) The TV started to smell really bad then a few days later blew up.
I dared my brother to put a flapjack in my Grandpa's Betamax Video Recorder. We blamed our baby cousin.
Stole my Mums engagement ring from beside the sink and exchanged it for a super big sparkly marble at school. The grown ups sorted it out.

Sit on my front door step with a pile of almond fruits fresh off the tree that I would gently throw into the road so when cars would drive over them they would explode and simultaneously “shoot” my dad’s capped off replica shotgun with those little rolls of gunpowder caps. So much screeching of brakes.

Poured all the bathroom toiletries into the sink to make a 'potion', including a full bottle of my mums chanel no5!

i really dont know why i thught this was "ok" but my friend and I would sometimes (definitely more than once) shake blazers hanging outside out form room and bagsy the smaller coins.
Now I look back on it, I come from a well off family and she was on free school meals and hard up as heck - she never had spends so it seemed quite reasonable to help her get some. It really didnt feel like stealing but I am super ashamed of it now.

We once climbed onto the roof of a neighbour and tipped buckets of water down their chimney when they were on holiday. They came home to spot all over their living room, and we were promptly grassed on by the neighbour over the road who had watched us do it.

Me and db played with the boy from next door but one every day.The boy had made a "shop" in his garage with rows and rows of different branded cigarette packets he'd collected .He pissed me off one day so I got a plastic pole and wrecked his shop.

I apologised to him at his 21st party.I was forgiven.

Here’s 2 more. 70s kid. We had a long pine table with 2 pine bench seats. We kept on swinging on them despite being told not to and I got a gash in my head that required hospital. Then one day playing hide and seek near flats, stood up and whacked my head on concrete balcony and required more stitches in head.

I was about 7 when I stole a Jem and the Holograms stationary set from Asda.

I think that was mild compared to some of these.

Oh my God 😂😭the little bitch

I used to swap the price labels around in B&Q 😣😳I was about 8 too.

Used to put things in the letter box :/ yogurt and things.

Ooft.

I bet she loved you for that!! 😂

My son did a similar thing...Said we'd won £250,000 in a wretched newspaper scratch card game {that came free with the paper}

My heart soared on a woosh of adrenaline - then crashed when I looked at the card ,it was for the wrong date, and son said it was a joke.

Poverty is no fun..your poor mum, but you at least have the good grace to feel guilty. 👍

Some of these animal-related ones are really upsetting. 😥

When I was about 2 I managed to squeeze my ‘leak-proof’ sippy cup containing apple juice all over the fairly new family laptop. I don’t know why I did it but remember watching the liquid disappear into the keyboard with fascination. It ended up corrupting the hard drive and most photos of me at that age were lost as a result. My Dad got the blame as he was supposed to be watching me!

I waved ham in the face of a poor vegetarian friend once when we were 6 as she claimed to be scared of meat. Looking back I feel embarrassed at that and I became vegan aged 14 (stayed that way ever since!).

I also stole a 10p bracelet from the primary school disco ‘shop’ then felt too guilty so I snuck it back and paid for it properly.

One day tricked my Dad who famously hated marmite into enjoying a lovely ice cream sundae I had made for him. No prizes for guessing what I used instead of chocolate sauce…