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Original poster

What age did your child get a proper hobby they genuinely committed to?

105 replies

Fishandchipsatthebeach · 14/10/2023 09:25

What age did your child start an out of school activity that they actually wanted to do and committed to for a reasonable period of time?

What was the hobby?

DD is 5.5 and shows good natural sporting talent but we’ve tried and given up tennis, Playball, Dance, Rugby tots

She moans a lot about swimming but that’s a non-negotiable so she has to do it.

I don’t want to be pushy but I’d like her to do some form of activity or sport as she’s getting more into wanting to watch YouTube etc at the weekends

We are an active family and encourage outdoorsy time, visit lots of Nat Trust type places, but unfortunately some of her friends don’t seem to be active / outdoorsy and since starting school she talks a lot about TikTok (when I have not let her have!) and stuff like that which is what some of her friends seem to do.

I was obsessed with horses as a kid, but think that started closer to age 10

OP posts:
MrsRobinsonsHandprints · 14/10/2023 14:27

You don't have to stick at anything. Everything is learning and adding to skill- it isn't wrong to try things and decide you don't want to continue.

My niece tried everything, and at about 15 found something she loved and the broad background of lots of opportunities meant she had skills others didn't. She is now in the GB team at U21.

TheYearOfSmallThings · 14/10/2023 14:28

It's great for children to try different things. It builds social.skills and gives them confidence to try things. I don't think.itmatters if they don't stick to it

I agree, and I also think that if you have tried lots of things and found they were not for you, that in itself is useful. I see people on Mumsnet who feel deprived and bitter because their parents didn't get them into activities which they believe would have turned into richly rewarding lifelong hobbies. Lots of "I am going to give my children the opportunities my parents never gave me".

Well my parents gave me and my brother's ALL the opportunities, and we didn't stick to any of the many things they paid for, and we also don't care and live happy fulfilled lives without playing the flute or going orienteering or ever getting our black belts. Most people are like that. But if you didn't try lots of activities (and you have a certain type of personality) you can blame a whole chunk of your adult life on that.

HighburyHope · 14/10/2023 14:37

DS as a tiny child was desperate to join the weekend football club which only let them start at 5. He spent much of his 4th birthday wailing “but when will I be fiiiiiive?”. He’s still passionate about his football at 11 but has added tennis in the meantime. Astronomy is gaining ground.

DD’s great passions are tennis (since about 8), drama (same) and cooking & baking (9).

For myself, I remember the moment when, aged 7, I saw and touched and held the violin my friend had been given. I was completely entranced. I don’t think she stuck with it for long, but my beloved violin has been my unstinting companion all my life.

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IbizaToTheNorfolkBroads · 14/10/2023 18:44

DS started playing ukulele age 7, moved to guitar about 18 months later. now 15 he plays guitar - lessons, orchestra (classical guitar), band (electric guitar).and he's going gcse music. He also fit his archery license to shoot when he was 10, and would shoot a lot more often if he didn't have to rely on someone who could drive to take him there.

DD really enjoys Art, and has been going to a weekend class for about a year, and dabbles in all sorts of arty stuff at home. She's 12.

IbizaToTheNorfolkBroads · 14/10/2023 18:47

WaterfallOfDreams · 14/10/2023 10:22

DS joined cubs at six. He genuinely never missed a night at cubs, and moved on to scouts and explorers. He’s an adult now, and still volunteers.

He's made lifelong friends, travelled abroad, and tried things as diverse as hill climbing to quad biking, camping to kayaking, dragon boat racing and more, thanks to being part of that organisation.

I’d recommend it to anyone.

Agreed. Mine both started Beavers at 6, have been all the way though - dd currently a scout, DS is an Explorer - as we speak - he's at camp doing Young Leader training.he's re-met friends he knew from nursery!

Bunnycat101 · 14/10/2023 22:12

How is she not committing to things though? Are you giving them a reasonable chunk of time to try an activity, does she actively hate the things you’ve tried?

It just seems so normal as part of my daughter’s peer group that they all want to do everything and the challenge is fitting it in/forcing them to pick.

TakeMe2Insanity · 14/10/2023 22:19

DS was 2 and a half and got into a particular sport. As in we were watching a series of games on tv and then he began enjoying it. Then he began using props to try and play it. When he 3 he’d beg to go to classes/to play it but too young. He’s now 7 and still utterly in love with it. He has plenty of toys but they are untouched. He just loves this particular sport.

Millybob · 14/10/2023 22:22

She's five! Why does she even need a hobby? Can't she just play?

LouOrange · 14/10/2023 22:22

I started ponies at 5, DD started age 2. She’s tried a few other things but prefers ponies.

Yourebeingtooloud · 14/10/2023 22:25

Both my dc did lots of hobbies / classes from pre school age (or earlier) - swimming, sport, dance, music, girl guiding / scouting.

But they expressed real preferences that weren’t guided by us at around 7.

HelenaJustina · 14/10/2023 22:28

DD picked up football 3 years ago, started in a mixed team and then moved to a girls team when enough of them joined her. Now Y6 and interest shows no waning. Also adores horses and rides twice weekly, cares for ponies more often. Has been doing this for 4 years.
Another DD begged to try gymnastics for about 18 months before I let her try out in Y2, now a national champion in her discipline aged 12.
Another’s swim teacher suggested they try out for the local swim club, they passed trials and have been swimming more seriously ever since (up to 8hrs weekly now) that started 5 years ago.

Theresit · 14/10/2023 22:30

Mountain biking aged 11, still keen 10years on. Took park in competitions early on but unfortunately DH and I weren’t in a position to travel all over the country during the season so ended up only doing the local parts. He mostly does it for fun now, but has competed in endurance events a few times.

BananaPyjamaLlama · 14/10/2023 22:36

I think to have tried and "given up" that many options at 5.5 is a lot. Shes still so little. Maybe she gave up some of those options because really what she wanted to do was just go once or twice, give it a whirl and that was enough - at 5 years old I think kids often want to have a go (because they are only 5 so dont really know what they are having a go at!) but also I think they mostly just want (and need!) to play. Especially after a long day at school. Playing is a lot more important than structured activities - especially when so little.

XelaM · 14/10/2023 22:37

Horses 🐎 for my daughter.

Since about age 6 (now aged 13 and competes for BSJA). She rides every day after school and works at the yard on weekends. I must say, even though it's a total money pit, the health benefits have been enormous. She's very fit physically and it has made her into a very confident and resilient teenager. The benefits of fresh air and physical work.

MigGirl · 14/10/2023 22:37

DD, now 16 has done swimming club level since 10, but dabbled in triathlon since 8, she decided she didn't like the running so much and swapped to just swimming. She also does scouts in a big way to, she's an explorer and young leader which she loves, she started in beavers herself age 6. She did do dance from about 5 - 10, but gave it up as loved swimming more and didn't have time for both.

DS, now 13 so still plenty of time for him to change his mind. Is also into scouts again started in beavers and is hoping to do young leaders when he finishes scouts. He also plays tennis once a week which he seems to like but isn't to serious about it, he has done it since he was about 7. He also swims in the club to but it's slight enforced as he has asthma and swimming is really good for his chest. He does have a few friends that swim to so I think he finds it social as well. He tried tap dance when he was 5-8 I think he gave up due to to many girls, he actually enjoyed dancing.

MigGirl · 14/10/2023 22:43

Oh and DS wouldn't actually do anything as a small child (or now as a teenager to be honest) if I didn't drag him along. He actually love's things when he's there and I never made him do anything that he hated (he briefly tried gymnastics at 6, but cried during each class). He's just the type of child who would stay home and do nothing if I didn't encourage him to go.

Whereas DD would try anything quite happily and was always keen to go.

Snugglemonkey · 14/10/2023 23:01

5, a martial art. Other than that we have done lots of trying things out. I think it is positive to try things and would not get overly concerned with just keeping doing that even.

UsingChangeofName · 14/10/2023 23:38

Wolvesart · 14/10/2023 10:10

One thing on this thread I’m curious about is the notion that at 5 or 6 they have generally found something to stick to they like. Two things about this, firstly most things only start after kids have left pre school. Secondly, adults tend to facilitate sports.

Also, I like kids to be interested in football but if I see a 5 year old in sports kit I think it’s adult led

This.

I can't believe you are asking this question with a 5 yr old. Nor that they have 'tried and dropped' 4 things already. At 5 Hmm
I assumed you were talking about a teenager.

newhere24 · 15/10/2023 06:39

Another question is wether you want your child to fund that special hobby so early…. My oldest just likes tennis, and that is fine and not difficult to support.
My youngest absolutely LOVES ballet. that means weekends are gone (lessons, shows and associates lessons), after school lessons, etc… And then dealing with all the bullying (boys doing ballet need to be incredibly tough, the bullying is insane). I am very proud of him but sometimes wish I had never shown him that video age 4!

XelaM · 15/10/2023 07:49

newhere24 · 15/10/2023 06:39

Another question is wether you want your child to fund that special hobby so early…. My oldest just likes tennis, and that is fine and not difficult to support.
My youngest absolutely LOVES ballet. that means weekends are gone (lessons, shows and associates lessons), after school lessons, etc… And then dealing with all the bullying (boys doing ballet need to be incredibly tough, the bullying is insane). I am very proud of him but sometimes wish I had never shown him that video age 4!

In Russia male ballet dancers are considered to be the height of masculinity. Māris Liepa was one of the most beautiful men ever 😍Well done on your son for being so resilient. It's the most gorgeous sport.

popandchoc · 15/10/2023 08:13

Eldest started dance at 4 and did it till she was around 11. Now she does cheerleading which she has been doing for a couple of years, takes a lot of commitment as you have to show up for every practice .
Youngest has danced since she was 2 and is now also cheerleading. I can see her continuing the dance more though.

Both did gymnastics for a while, eldest for longer.

BlueIgIoo · 15/10/2023 08:16

Mine started dancing at 3 and still goes at 5.5. I'd be very surprised if they stopped in the next year or even 2 years. They love it but I'm also not sure they understand the concept of quitting something yet! It's just something they do, like school.

rocknrollaa · 15/10/2023 08:19

If you expect your child to have a hobby that they will commit to at such a young age, you are likely expecting too much/ putting too much pressure on.

I was 10 before I committed to something. Some people never find a particular interest/ hobby/ sport they want to pursue outside of work/ school and that's OK too as long as they're happy and active.

Just let her explore things and keep taking her out to the places you already take her. Don't pressure her, she's far too young.

StopVotingToryYouTwats · 15/10/2023 08:22

DS1 was about 9 when he took up a musical instrument which he has excelled at. But if he had tried something else, it may not have stuck.

DS2 tried a sport age 9 that he loved for a year. But then he got put off by the coach. He's recently taken up another sport and is loving it.
I don't know how long it will last but he's totally smitten right now and says he wants to do it professionally.

You have to let them try as much as they can in my opinion. Just keep encouraging them op. But don't make it seem like you are invested in them continuing 🤣

Unithorn · 15/10/2023 08:26

DS was 3 but it was coincidence really! There was a free trial for rugby tots so we went along to that and he was happy enough going and I liked meeting other parents to be honest. He carried on doing it and we always asked if he wanted to continue; would have been fully prepared to stop as soon as he stopped enjoying it but has always said he wants to carry on. He's 14 now and still plays rugby, he has tried other sports along the way but nothing he enjoys more.

I think it can be any age, and some don't like any sports/formal activities which is fine. Can you do some sort of physical activity as a family at weekends if they don't want to do a club?

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