Moving from London to New York- HELP PLEASE

[Newjobformoremoney]

Hi all,
In a bit of a whirlwind week it seems highly likely that we are relocating to New York for 6 months. Its all a bit overwhelming.
We have a dog that we'd take with us, has anyone done that and can recommend a service? Schooling? How do we manage that? We have a 5 year old and ideally I would cut my hours to PT (visa depending).
Apartment would be sorted by the company I think, but they have a few so does anyone recommend a good family friendly area?
What else should I be thinking about? What should I be thinking about? Any advice? Any good links?
They'd like us to move in January.... which feels very soon!
Any words of wisdom?

Try to stay domiciled in the UK for tax purposes since it's so much easier.

Oof, yes, this! Though six months on a non-immigrant visa doesn't meet the substantial presence requirement, so it should be pretty straightforward.
Also make sure the company has a good international accountant for you.

I wouldn't go through all that for six months. Is it really only six months? I'd stay here with dog and child.

6 months? I wouldn't relocate a child and dog for that. That's short enough where your husband can go himself and you can go over to visit.

So much stress for a child and dog. The dog would have to be guaranteed as well I think?

Agree with those saying stay home with dog and child. 6 months will fly by.

I like NYC but January-March is bitterly cold and unpleasant imo

I wouldn't give up my job and relocate my family for 6 months. Husband should go alone and come back for a long weekend every month.

in general it is pretty easy to register kids in school in the us- I moved a LOT as a kid, often on short notice, and as long as you can show residency (rental agreement would work) they find a spot for you. NYC may be a bit more complicated- or at least a bit more like London- in that you wouldn’t necessarily be guaranteed a place at closest school, but by law kids must be in education by 5 or 6 (depending on state). There are also lots of private options (Montessori, Steiner, etc).

In general I think the US does primary school well in that it is much more laid back, primary schools are very warm and nurturing places, and kindergarten would be very much play based still. You could probably find more structured British-like programs if that is your preference, but personally I think the uk system starts too early with formal education.

as a kid who moved a lot, I will also say that I loved then change and starting new schools, and think this haS given me confidence and flexibility/resourcefulness. Not everyone will be the same, but just want to add a balancing perspective to those who think it too disruptive. Also, I guess the alternative is homeschooling or not schooling at all - might be fine for some, but my 5 year olds would much rather be with other children.

Well whatever you do, don’t loose that career path.

If your company won’t compromise on remote, would they give you a 3 month sabbatical so you just come out for the middle section.

Being apart for 6 months with a few visits isn’t the end of the world

Agree - don’t do it for 6 months- especially as you say you are the main breadwinner.

DH worked over there for 5 weeks one summer. We joined him thinking it would be a great adventure (was in the summer holidays so no school disruption) it was the worst summer of my life.

Admittedly August isn’t the best time to live in NY. But we moved from a large house with a garden to a 2 bed flat (which was still £££) no outside space. I felt so claustrophobic. It was expensive then. It’s extortionate now with the exchange rate.

Don’t look at this with rose tinted glasses. It’s a huge upheaval especially with a dog/schools. For no benefit to you really. I would stay over here. DH can fly back and forth or you can go in the school holidays?

I'm with previous posters. This is a lot of work, stress, upheaval, paperwork, expense for 6 months, half of which will be bitterly cold and miserable. I really wouldn't do it, especially with a dog and a child in tow. It's really, really not worth it.

I'm also very very surprised that you're having this conversation in November and your DH's employer thinks everything can be organized for a move in January. The immigration service doesn't work that fast.

I think you need to slow down, think about the reality of it all and reassess. Sorry.

(I live on the East Coast, British citizen)

I agree with this. No way would I take a dog and a 5 year old through that move for 6 months.

I have done this with younger children and we had a wonderful experience but I wasn’t working. If this would impact your career I would reconsider whether it’s worth it for six months.

But if you do go, if the language you’re looking for is French, Spanish, German or Mandarin there will be a bilingual programme for your dc, although it will be expensive and you definitely want to get the company to pay for it.

In terms of family friendly areas, lower Manhattan is great because it’s a very international community and has lots of parks, also where a lot of corporate apartments are. The upper west and upper east are also good. Basically just avoid midtown if you can.

Try to imagine it day to day. you are in an apartment so every time your dog needs to go out (in the bitter cold of Jan and Feb and late at night) you have to wrap up and go down to the street - if your dh is out of the apartment you have to bring your daughter with you. Honestly you'd get more out of the experience if you boarded the dog for a couple of weeks and went over with your dd - played at living in NYC and then come home again and do the same in a few weeks time. presumably your dh could come back too for a long weekend every now and then.

My thoughts exactly!

@Luredbyapomegranate Oh no, they are happy to keep me (and would fight for me!) and are happy for me to go PT which was my suggestion, but I just need to figure out visas as I don't have a British passport (another drip feed sorry!).
And we really want to go! And are willing to make compromises to go. Plus my DD would love it too!

If they're happy to let you go PT and your DH's firm have an immigration firm on side to fast track through the visa process (which should also be able to cope with your nationality unless you're from what is considered a high-risk country), I'd do it. Like I said, we've done it a few times in the last 20 years and it's always been a good experience.

It's less upheaval to go for six months than it is for a few years, since you're not shipping a whole household full of contents, arranging permanent living space, etc.

@gwenneh yes they already have immigration lawyers who don't seem to think it will take 6 months. Appreciate that they could be wrong though and might be saying what his company wants to hear.
Also, we are totally doing it. We're an international family, who have already lived in multiple countries (albeit before kids).
Thanks @fairlygoodmother maybe I just shouldn't work.. will have a think.
They would keep my job open for 6 months, my skillset is specialist and at an exec level they wouldn't have someone in for 6 months anyway and they would take 3 months to show value.

@Suemademedoit could you let me know why you think the visas won't come through in time (this is my biggest worry actually)? His company immigration service seems to think a fast track option is possible and they didn't seem phased. I thought it did seem unrealistic...

I've been moving internationally for many years and many countries with 2 DC in tow (until recently) and can honestly say that if this is just for 6 months it really isn't worth it.

The I-129 form, the petition to apply, is the part that takes the longest. Those only get processed in CA or TX.

Even without fast track, I-129 petitions at CA are taking 3 weeks right now and then there's a ~25 day average to get the visa appointment for an L visa at London. There's premium processing available which takes the wait on the I-129 to 15 days so it's certainly do-able.

Thanks @gwenneh for that info!

Also, to clarify, I appreciate everyone who has commented on the thread saying not to go but that wasn't the question I asked. We are planning on going and based on our family make up we know its the right thing for us. I appreciate its not for everyone, and that's absolutely fine but in this case its right for us.

If you are only going for 6 months, check how difficult aka expensive to bring the dog back to the U.K. it's more difficult than the other way. Also the school would probably be preschool depending on their birthday.

I wasn't allowed to work when we went (this included voluntary work or work from home) on my derivative visa

I would seriously consider whether it is easier for him to go alone for just 6 months, take a 2-3 break there in the middle

Thanks @gogohmm but that's not the question I asked.
To reiterate, I would ask people on this thread to respect my families decisions.

On the dog, to bring him back we would fly to France and then drive him across. It seems the easiest way and he has a French dog passport

Ok - so you have researched how tricky it is to transport a dog back and forth to the US?

People are only pointing out things you may not have considered. I wish I’d posted I hear asking if it was a good idea to spend the Summer in New York with 2 young kids whilst my DH worked there. Maybe I would have reconsidered!