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Original poster

US maternity/daycare question

40 replies

Laytwir024 · 19/03/2021 21:38

Ok so I've been bingewatching Superstore and I know it's just tv, but the lack of maternity leave is shocking - and general support for low paid workers in general. I've always known it was bad, but I read a stat online saying that about a quarter of women go back to work when their baby is around 10 days old! Do daycares actually take babies this young? Has anyone had to experience this in real life?

(As a mum I can't watch things like this and not look up the reality 😩)

Just curious really!

OP posts:
Sceptre86 · 20/03/2021 19:17

Appreciate it is not the norm but I bled for 8 months after having ds and definitely wouldn't have wanted to be back before a year was up. Maternity leave isn't amazing in the uk but it is much better than the USA. There are still many women that can't take longer than 6 months because statutory maternity pay won't pay rent or mortgage and they can't afford the unpaid time off. What is good in the UK is maternity rights, the right to request flexible working, that your job has to be held upon for you and you can't get discriminated against because of your pregnancy. Why don't more women shout from the rooftops about this in the US or do they?

mammmamia · 20/03/2021 19:23

@Sceptre86 I agree. In a world where #metoo exists, transgender rights are at the forefront, there are organisations committed to expanding the number of women on company boards and the Black Lives Matter movement (quite rightly) exploded last year - why are American women not standing up for themselves about this?

Maybe they are but I read a lot of American press and it’s not something I’ve seen much about.

Original poster
Laytwir024 · 20/03/2021 19:38

@Ahbahbahbah

Well in superstore Cheyenne’s mum looks after the baby at first - although by the time she gets married her mum is in jail so not sure who’s minding the baby then. But yes I’d guess there are a lot of cheap and very low quality childcare places there.
I was thinking more Amy tbh! (Season 4 - sorry if spoilers! )
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Original poster
Laytwir024 · 20/03/2021 19:41

@NoGoodPunsLeft yeah that wound me up a bit.

And with the maternity thing, I dont get why they didn't make more of it like why didn't Jonah give her some of his vacation days or something? It seemed way more accepted even through the comedy. Hopefully it's raised the prevalence of how horrific the whole thing is.

OP posts:
Knittingnanny · 20/03/2021 19:42

I think that it’s because there are so many different states with different laws etc .
It’s apparently why USA is the only country which hasn’t signed the United Nations children’s rights act, so many different laws etc.

Knittingnanny · 20/03/2021 19:44

My daughter in law is very pro active in petitioning, attending protests etc re women’s rights but I don’t think it’s widespread

Knittingnanny · 20/03/2021 19:44

Amongst most women that should read

IHateThinkingUpANewUsername · 20/03/2021 19:50

Are PND rates higher in the US?
My mental health would’ve been FUCKED if I’d had to leave my baby for work at a few weeks. It’s no wonder there are so many more SAHM and it’s a much more patriarchal society Hmm
I follow a woman on Instagram who has gone through multiple rounds of IVF to have a baby and will have 6 weeks off with him before returning to work.
(Obvious disclaimer that there’s nothing wrong with a woman going back to work when she WANTS after a baby)

MyGorramShip · 20/03/2021 20:01

I don’t think sick pay exists either, but I’m happy to be corrected.

Those episodes are horrific, I had one traumatic birth that took months to recover from physically, and one amazing birth that took only a week or two, but I still would have been useless at work and a fucking wreck from leaving my baby at that age.

mammmamia · 20/03/2021 20:12

Totally agree and would also be interested to see PND rates or maybe they just don’t measure it in the same way.

One of my cousins I mentioned earlier in the thread works from home and has her baby at home with the nanny so that’s not as bad. No judgment for women who genuinely want to return to work and use daycare from an early age or course.

SoCrimeaRiver · 20/03/2021 20:24

I have no idea how you'd manage with such a short time off work but I think workplace childcare and places to express are more common as mothers return to work so early.

00100001 · 20/03/2021 20:31

Poor babies. Don't even know they're born and are handed off to strangers whilst mum goes to work.

makingababy · 23/03/2021 13:10

@Laytwir024

So so sad. If you'd gone through anything else as traumatic that didn't involve a baby you'd get sick leave right?

I dont know how you'd even cope at work! Is there any sort of legal protection e.g. you can't come in a week after birth? Cannot be good for the woman's body! And your hormones are so crazy. I remember sobbing just because I wasn't holding him when mine was first born.

Paid sick leave is rare (again, more common in higher paid jobs). Most employees have a set number of “unpaid time off/sick leave” days e.g. 10-20 to cover your own sick days, days you need off to look after kids when they’re sick, etc. If you need more days you can be subject to disciplinary or at risk of being sacked, depends on the circumstances and how sympathetic the employer is.

Don’t think there is any legal time period to prevent people going back to work after delivery. Some people view a quick return to work as a badge of honour (and some are devastated by it).

This is an increasingly hot topic over there and it’s really up to the employers to improve things at the moment. As PP have said, state laws vary so anything covering the country would have to be enacted by federal law. That’s difficult given the US right wing stance which is anti-anything-near-resembling-socialism. Also corporations have an awful lot of political sway and any semblance of giving move rights to workers is difficult to pass.

HerRoyalNotness · 23/03/2021 14:15

@MyGorramShip

I don’t think sick pay exists either, but I’m happy to be corrected.

Those episodes are horrific, I had one traumatic birth that took months to recover from physically, and one amazing birth that took only a week or two, but I still would have been useless at work and a fucking wreck from leaving my baby at that age.

The company I worked for had one week sick pay, 3 weeks holidays, but it rolled into one bucket called paid time off. The sick pay could be taken hourly eg if you had a dr appt. We also hard short and long term disability insurance as a % of pay. I was on short term after I had a c section for 8 weeks
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