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Original poster

Do you believe in fate?

32 replies

Sunny4876 · 18/09/2020 20:09

Do you believe you meet certain people for a reason,things happen for a reason,you dream or fantasize about things and then they become reality.Or you're thinking about someone more than usual and they pop up? Is deja vu the same?

OP posts:
mildlymiffed · 18/09/2020 20:13

Yes I do. I think people are brought into your life when they should be, for whatever reason. I realise it's a little woo... but that's how I feel! Even if those people are sent to challenge you and help you grow.

Original poster
Sunny4876 · 18/09/2020 20:17

That's what I believe,just wondering if I'll ever work out the message I'm supposed to be getting.

OP posts:
TheYeaSayer · 18/09/2020 20:24

Nope, not a bit of it. How can there be a decreed order of events for anyone's life?

WiserOlder · 18/09/2020 20:28

Hmmm, I believe that if you do not make the unconscious conscious the same things will keep happening to you. And sometimes, when you're ready to learn the lesson that finally makes the unconscious conscious it comes along and feels like fate.
But I do feel I'm in control of my own life.

BashfulClam · 18/09/2020 20:30

The thing that blows my mind about fate is that my husband is almost a year older than me, so therefore when he was born my fate was decided even though I didn’t exist at all yet....that’s why it feels like it can’t be fate.

BananaLlamaConCalma · 18/09/2020 21:09

Yes and no. DP and I were in the same circles for years but never met. When we did we were sort of blindsided by each other and it was a fantastic relationship at the start. I always saw it as we were meant to meet and circle 1 didn't work out so 2 was created and so on until we did. However, mostly I believe in science and logic.

BanditsBum · 18/09/2020 21:16

Hmm its something I say a lot 'it must be fate!' but deep down no I actually don't think I do.

In terms of my life there have been things that have seemed like fate but in reality if I hadn't made certain decisions I wouldn't have gone down certain paths and wouldn't be where I am now, so I made my own fate so to speak.

Bikingbear · 18/09/2020 21:23

I believe in fate to an extent.
I turned down a job offer that would have brought me and DH together about a year before we eventually met. Years later it still gets me.

Octopiggy · 18/09/2020 21:29

No. Lots of people have to share their lives with horrible abusive people and it’s not fate, it doesn’t happen for ‘a reason.’ Neither is it fate if you meet/share your lives with wonderful pleasant people. It’s a chance, circumstances, and personalities.

WiserOlder · 18/09/2020 21:36

@Bikingbear

I believe in fate to an extent. I turned down a job offer that would have brought me and DH together about a year before we eventually met. Years later it still gets me.
You mightn't have made an impression on each other a year earlier!
Bikingbear · 18/09/2020 21:52

That's true and would we have wanted to date if we were working together? Who knows but I feel our paths were destined to cross.

buttersidedown · 18/09/2020 23:30

Yes, I totally believe in fate. I believe that no matter what our decisions, the course of our lives will be the same, no matter what. I’m not superstitious or anything like that, so not sure why I believe in fate as wholeheartedly as I do!

HalloBrian · 18/09/2020 23:46

Kind of...but from a more religious perspective.

I believe that I was created for a purpose
I believe in a God that loves me and has goodwill towards me
I believe that God sends me blessings that I am grateful for, and allows me to go through hardships through which I learn and grow.
I believe that I have a destiny, that I am here to do my part in doing good whilst I am alive, and a destiny of love and completeness when I die.

It is kind of like believing in fate, but if Fate was a person, rather than a force.

NeedToKnow101 · 18/09/2020 23:51

No. We give things meaning once they've happened.

AgeLikeWine · 18/09/2020 23:55

No.

‘Fate’ is a form of confirmation bias. Most people struggle with concepts of probability and randomness so they invest stories to explain what they are unable to understand.

Twiggywinkle13 · 19/09/2020 00:01

I completely agree with @HalloBrian. I believe my path is already mapped out, I think I have control over it because I make decisions but I know really that I don’t. My fate as it were has already been decided for me. I too strongly believe I was put here for a purpose, I’m still trying to figure that one out.

Zoflorabore · 19/09/2020 00:07

100% yes I believe.

I remember watching the film “sliding doors” and being absolutely fascinated by the notion that one missed train ( or not ) could set off a chain of events.

I’ve had a few instances in my life where I feel like I’ve meant to meet a certain person for whatever reason. I do get strong feelings sometimes about things and have been told a few times that I’ve got the gift Wink

BigFuzzyBear · 19/09/2020 00:12

No. How does fate explain the experiences of people who’ve known pain and suffering? How can ‘things happen for a reason’ explain the lives of those who are killed or otherwise harmed, babies and children who will never know love? How awful to think that could be mapped out for them.

janetmendoza · 19/09/2020 00:32

People only credit good things to fate. No one says it was fate that ds was horrendously abused by his birth parents cos that would be mad. But loads of people say it was fate that he ended up with us as adoptive parents. But it wasn't of course. Both happenings were random.

MirandaMarple · 19/09/2020 00:36

@TheYeaSayer

Nope, not a bit of it. How can there be a decreed order of events for anyone's life?
This.

We only ever refer to fate after the event. It's a load of crap.

TheYeaSayer · 19/09/2020 01:06

@BigFuzzyBear

No. How does fate explain the experiences of people who’ve known pain and suffering? How can ‘things happen for a reason’ explain the lives of those who are killed or otherwise harmed, babies and children who will never know love? How awful to think that could be mapped out for them.
Yes, this.

How come some people are supposedly fated to achieve this or that or meet their soul mate then, but others - innocent, decent people - are destined to be abused, hungry, die young from cancer etc.? How does that work? Which benevolent force dictated that?

HalloBrian · 19/09/2020 07:07

Those are really good points about suffering. And, obviously a question that all faith based worldviews must wrestle with. I don't have a perfect answer but my Christian perspective is something like this:

God's will was to give us meaningful free will - our choices have consequences, and we even have the right to go against God's will e.g. we can hurt others

Our fate/destiny isn't concluded in mortal life but eternal life. Judgement Day which is often displayed as a bad thing in media portrayals of Christianity, is also a day when every wronged person receives the justice they were denied on earth. Every innocent victim will be validated and restored.

Eternal life is longer and happier than this life, to such an extent that even the most awful sufferings we face in this life will fade away in perspective of eternal joy.

To an extent all people experience part of God's goodwill towards them: through the beauty of creation , and our ongoing existence.

But those who choose to trust in God and dedicate themselves to Him experience a greater involvement of the creator in their lives than those who don't. They are more protected from evil, receive more blessings and are promised eternal life and justification. However, the Christian may still undergo suffering and mistreatment in this world (in fact the Bible promises that they will) but because they are completely in God's care, they know even what is used against them will also be used for good (by developing character or by demonstrating their commitment to God/righteousness)

Christians believe that you can enter into this pact because of Jesus. And we follow his example and attitude towards destiny. We try and do good, as our life's purpose, we are grateful for the good, and we accept the bad, believing in a greater life to come after death.

Sorry, that's a long and still incomplete answer. It's a big topic!

SexyGiraffe · 19/09/2020 07:12

I do not believe in fate, but I do believe we can choose how we respond to the events in our lives and we can choose to learn from them - which can sometimes feel like fate. I don't believe there is a pre-determined path for me.

Meruem · 19/09/2020 07:16

I don’t necessarily believe in fate but I do think, in my own life, that whatever happens I’ll be ok. It’s more optimism I guess but my experiences have been that however bad things get, something always comes along to make it all better. I’ve been dealt some harsh blows but also had amazing luck. I don’t think it was “predestined” though. I do feel life is more random than that.

SqidgeBum · 19/09/2020 07:20

No. I think things happen because of choices; both yours and those of other people. It's just chance. I turned down a job in italy, the only thing in my life I regret in some ways, but because of that choice I ended up with my DH. I dont think it was fate. I could have easily ended up with someone else and been just as happy. It was just a choice that I made for logical reasons, and then choices he made for logical reasons, that brought us together.