Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Wedding with no photographer - would you judge?

99 replies

CalmDownPacino · 22/02/2019 11:25

As the title really....it's my wedding - only a small affair, second time around for both of us. Register office and then a party afterwards. We categorically can't afford a photographer so aren't having one. Would you be judging if you came?

OP posts:
AnotherEmma · 22/02/2019 12:44

I wouldn't judge you at all. But if I was attending and you asked me to take a few "official" photos I'd be very happy to. (I wouldn't call myself an amateur photographer as such, but have a decent camera and love taking photos, especially portraits.) So I suggest that you think about whether any of your guests are into photography, and if there's one who likes taking photos, ask if they will take a few - they don't have to be "on duty" for the whole thing, such take some photos of bride and groom at the register office. I'm sure you will be glad to have at least a few decent ones.

"I am also having disposable cameras on the tables at the party"
Is this a retro thing? Given you must be having a budget wedding (no money for photographer) I think this is a big waste of money. You'll have to pay to get all the films developed and there's no guarantee any of the photos will be any good. There's a reason people don't do disposable cameras any more - most people have smartphone cameras and they are much better quality!

AnotherEmma · 22/02/2019 12:47

Also my grandad died less than 6 months after my wedding and I treasure the wedding photos with him in them.

Don't know if you plan to have children with your fiancé but if you do I'm sure they'd love to see some photos from your wedding day.

Photos and rings are the only things that last! Well the marriage too hopefully Grin

Mumsymumphy · 22/02/2019 13:01

You don't need a photographer. I had one, charged us £300 and was pretty crap. Also tried flogging us a photobook for £70 that you can get on Groupon for less than a tenner. Just ask a guest with a decent camera phone to take them & print them off. Jobs a gudden'.

Have a lovely day!

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

DontCallMeCharlotte · 22/02/2019 13:05

The last couple of weddings I've been to have been reportage style photography with maybe one big group photo.

I wouldn't judge at all but we didn't have a professional photographer and I do regret it (a guest had claimed they could do it - they couldn't).

Fortunately, we managed to get an album's worth of prints from other guests.

Splodgetastic · 22/02/2019 13:09

I wouldn’t judge. We did have a photographer but to be honest my BIL took better photos on the day!

AnotherEmma · 22/02/2019 13:13

"I had one, charged us £300 and was pretty crap."

Well, you get what you pay for.

It takes a lot of skill, experience and expensive equipment to take high quality photos.

If you don't care about having high quality photos, fair enough, but don't claim that all photographers are useless because you paid peanuts for a bad one.

CigarsofthePharoahs · 22/02/2019 13:22

I'd be happy about it! Waiting for endless photographs is so so dull!
Maybe ask a friend with a good camera to get a few nice couple shots?

CalmDownPacino · 22/02/2019 13:23

Often random snaps are better and more meaningful than the horrendous posed photos

I am hoping that turns out to be the case! I look back on the photos from my first wedding and cringe. There is one of me sat on a bench with my hand on my knee gazing at my ring! Why?!

OP posts:
CalmDownPacino · 22/02/2019 13:26

Don't know if you plan to have children with your fiancé but if you do I'm sure they'd love to see some photos from your wedding day

Nope. We both already have grown up/almost grown-up children and won't be having any more!

I might leave the disposable cameras. I hadn't thought about the cost of developing them.

OP posts:
AtSea1979 · 22/02/2019 13:28

I wouldn’t judge but if it was me i’d rather cut corners elsewhere, photos are precious to me, even though i’m divorced my wedding photos are the only ones I have of my great aunts and uncles

Birdie6 · 22/02/2019 13:29

I had a very small wedding for my 2nd time around - only 18 people there for a quick ceremony by a celebrant, and lunch in a restaurant . BUT we did budget for a photographer - I love having good photos because, really, that's what you've got to remember the day. The man we had was really lovely, no "posed" photos but just beautiful pictures to remember the occasion.

In your position I'd cut down on other things and have a photographer.

KeptTheBeachesShipwreckFree · 22/02/2019 13:38

I wouldn't judge but, in your shoes, I would skimp on something else so that I could have a good photographer who specialises in reportage style photos.

Yes, phone cameras are very good now but it's the person behind them who actually takes the photo - the best camera in the world will only take mediocre shots if the person behind it is a shit photographer!

Anyway, that's just my opinion and it's a rather unpopular one on Mumsnet - the place where anything other than a phone pic is deemed "tacky".

MaFleur · 22/02/2019 13:41

Make sure your guests know you are encouraging them to take lots of photos! At DBs wedding some thought that no photographer meant no photos were allowed. Fortunately he soon put the right and they have some truly beautiful photos of the day.

GOODCAT · 22/02/2019 13:42

We didn't have a photographer as such but asked a friend to take pictures and also got some great photos from other friends and family. I am glad we did have photos, but felt no need for professional ones.

EnidButton · 22/02/2019 13:48

Of all the things we paid ££££ for when we got married, the photographer is the only one that I regret a bit. Think we only looked at them to choose which ones to go into the final album and to have reprinted for gifts to parents etc and once when they were completed and delivered. They're amazingly good pictures and everything but meh.

A friend took lots that they sent to us and they're actually probably better at capturing people's personalities and their feelings. Maybe because they knew them?

Anyway, no I wouldn't judge. Yes I think it's a good thing to save money on.

EnidButton · 22/02/2019 13:50

I'm not a photos of people or selfies kind of person though. Some people are really into photos of family and friends. Depends what you like yourself.

Skyejuly · 22/02/2019 13:53

We didnt have one.
Everyone LOVED it lol no awkwardness and people could take pictures if they wished.

Also the registrar said how lovely not to be posing and doing stuff for pictures!

PurpleWithRed · 22/02/2019 13:53

We didn’t have one but we told everyone in advance and asked them to take loads of photos and set up a Dropbox for them. We got plenty of really fantastic photos. Saved us over £1500 which was much better spent funding a free champagne bar.

SauvingnonBlanketyBlanc · 22/02/2019 13:54

We went to a small wedding 2 days ago,No Photographer.It was lovely everyone just took pics then sent them to b&g after.

GreigLaidlawsbarofsoap · 22/02/2019 14:00

No I absolutely would not judge, if I were a guest I'd be frankly relieved not to have that interminable hanging around between the ceremony and venue while the B&G get photos done.
The last big "fancy" wedding I went to, we were given one small glass of fizz and a few canapés to last the THREE and a HALF HOURS it took to do all the photos before the meal. Most of us decamped to the bar. They had a lot of hungry drunk guests and some banter/heckling during the speeches - before the food too which was another lifetime half an hour at least. Not a good atmosphere!
Yours sounds wonderful and much more fun than these grand £25k+ days people are paying for.

SilverySurfer · 22/02/2019 14:02

A wedding I attended didn't have a photographer but they put disposable cameras on each table and some of the resulting shots were wonderful.

tellmewhenthespaceshiplandscoz · 22/02/2019 14:06

Everything anotheremma said Smile.

OP weddings are so personal you're likely to get a 50/50 split on here so I'd say if staged photos aren't your thing don't bother. Cameras on our phones are so good now that if we were getting married now (13 years this year!) I don't think I'd bother paying a small fortune for a photographer.

My BIL has a video camera and offered to film parts of the day. He focused on guests mingling before the ceremony, a bit of the ceremony, drinks before the meal and then the meal capturing the speeches. It's an amateur job and probably only 20 minutes long but I love watching it back and treasure that more than our photos. And gawd I looked so youthful and fresh not old and haggard now I'm a parent!

tellmewhenthespaceshiplandscoz · 22/02/2019 14:07

Also Greig's point about how boring the photos are for guests Grin

SinkGirl · 22/02/2019 14:12

I’d be so sad not to have my wedding photos - they’re the only photos of me that I like, and the whole thing was such a blur I remember very little of it! We had a reportage photographer with only a few posed group shots - I honestly forgot he was there most of the time.

We had disposable cameras and wouldn’t now - some of the photos were lovely but the quality was awful and the same pics taken on someone’s phone now would be much better!

Could you afford someone for an hour or two, just to take good quality photos in an unintrusive way?

rosablue · 22/02/2019 14:35

I wouldn't bother with the disposable phones on the tables - they're expensive to buy and develop and often come back with rubbish pictures.

Instead...
Do any of the guests particularly like taking photos and/or are they any good? I would ask a couple of guests (one on each side, plus maybe a couple of friends who would between them know who lots of the guests are) to be your photographers and ask them to try to ensure that they get at least a couple of pictures of each member of the family/all the friends.

Talk to them about this in advance so that they can be prepared and make sure they have plenty of space on their memory cards/phones and a fully charged battery. It might also mean that somebody will bring along a dslr rather than not bother.

Work out if there are any particular shots you want - of you as a couple, individuals, family groups etc - make a list and make sure that you have several copies of it. Ask those taking the pix if they would help you do these pix and get someone like the best man or an usher (or equivalent if you're not having them formally do the role!) as a designated person to collect up people for the photos when you're doing them. Aim for some at the registry office and then if you miss any, or you want a second set of everything in case they're better, then you can still try again at the party. have a little announcement to this effect at the registry office (they often do a little 'notices' type announcement about what's happening next at the end, making sure that everyone has lifts, taking flowers with you and so on, so include in that so the photo sessions, albeit brief, won't be a surprise and you won't all be waiting for auntie maude who has wandered off to inspect the flowers next door)

If there is anybody there on their own or who won't know many people, asking them to take a photo of everyone can be quite a good way for them to meet people with no pressure - gives them a reason to talk to people, to interact briefly and disappear off again...

Lots of people will have mobiles that will take great pictures so again, actively ask people to take picture and have the link to send them to you after the event. If you have techy friends, there might be somebody who would be happy to take a laptop and download the evening's photos at the event.

IF you're having tables, put a list of photo/video challenges on each table - some 'serious' best pictures of the bride/groom/couple/family/food/cake/ring/venue/etc - but also silliest face, selfie with the most people in, funniest captured moment, sloppiest kiss, wildest dance move, most unexpected moment and so on. Offer prizes for some of the most memorable pictures of the event that really capture it for you (I'm thinking tiny or fun prizes, so a bag of haribo or a freddy frog chocolate bar rather than anything expensive) to encourage people to have a go.

One other thing to try - ask a local photography group or course if there are any keen amateurs or students that would be able to take pictures for you - even if just for the registry office or an hour at the party - for a minimal fee (what would you have spent on disposable cameras?) and the chance to have a go at photographing a real wedding, that you would let them use for their portfolio and provide a reference. You might find that there are no takers but sometimes it can be very difficult for people to get that first booking to become a wedding photographer so they might be up for it. I know a couple of people who started like this - basically did it for petrol costs and their food - as they needed those all important pictures to show to clients that they could do it. If you don't ask - you definitely won't get someone. If you do ask - there's a chance that you might find someone...

[Apologies if I have cross posted with anyone, I started writing this a couple of hours ago and got pulled away - but thought I would post anyway]

Anyhow, hope you have a lovely wedding and a wonderful marriage afterwards! Flowers