My children are home educated AMA

[NotBackToSchool]

With all the talk about rising numbers of home educated children and increasing pressures on attendance with fines for parents, I thought there might be interest in a typical day for children who haven't gone back to school this week.

My kids as KS1 and KS2 age.

We started this morning with my younger child getting in to bed with me to read her current book - a ladybird 'read it yourself' version of Heidi.
My older child read the 4th Harry Potter book in their own bed.

After breakfast they both did a maths video lesson before I started work as a childminder.

We're using the book 'The Tiny Seed' this week to learn about seed dispersal and made seed collages.

They mostly played with their friends all day and we went to the park.

This afternoon one of them has a dance class, and later we'll be finishing off the Lucy Worsley Six Wives series on iplayer (SIX the musical obsession!)

Everyday is a bit different generally but today was pretty typical! If anyone wants to know more then just ask.

I really feel for you. What was the reason you decided to do it? It’s possible it was still better than the alternative, you never know as only followed the path you took. Don’t berate yourself it would’ve taken a lot of time and energy to do it!

"They mostly played with their friends all day and we went to the park."

Doesn't it bother you that my son was at school today learning to read, write and count while your kids just did the above? I'm sorry but it's very irresponsible to just let kids mainly do as they please, they should be receiving an education.

Well done @NotBackToSchool :)
I home edded my two for over a decade. Both now doing well as adults. Neither have been in anyway negatively affected by the fact they mostly didnt attend school. And both have definitely benefited from not having done so (except when very little and later on for college/6th form)

@Newsenmum you are so lovely, thank you. I chose to HE when she was in Year 7 and she just couldn't cope with the environment. She refused to go and I had school attendance people breathing down my neck despite explaining what was happening with her. I suppose I jumped to that option because I was also HE as a child. Looking back though, I wish I had got her more support in place and kept persevering in supporting her back to school.

@NotBackToSchool how do you find being in a dual role as both parent and education facilitator? Do you see them as separate roles even? If your children don't want to do anything formal, or even anything with an educational value, is that ok or do you insist on something every day?

That's great for you and school is a really good option for lots of children.

I think socialising is really important and healthy and my children love making friends and going to parties.

Luckily my children are getting a really good education.

No it doesn't bother me I'm sure you're doing what's best for you and your child.

My children have learned to read, write and count too, just in much less time - so they have more time available to play and go to the park.

I was home educated for primary and it had its pros and cons. I was fortunate as my mother was a qualified primary school teacher and very conscientious. I had a very free and easy childhood with a lot of time to spare but I also kept up academically. My social life was a bit limited as I was living in a very isolated place (hence the need for home schooling).

However, I would never choose home education for my own children unless they were very unhappy. There is a lot you miss out on if you don’t go to school and I am hugely relieved that I went to school for my secondary education (despite being utterly miserable for the first couple of years of adjustment).

I do realise that the school system really doesn’t suit quite a lot of children and I totally understand why some parents make the choice to take their children out. I think a wider variety of schools should be available including hybrid options.

Good for you! We would've done this if we'd stayed in Yorkshire. A few home educated kids have tragically needed a net that isn't there. We have to answer to the local school, rather than an LEA, and as they've got to know us, they've jumped through hoops to help, give us free materials, praise and encouragement.

I don't really see it as separate roles, education is part of parenting to me.

They have a lot of time to do their own things and input into what they're learning but we still have some structure.
There are non-negotiable things like reading every day, maths lessons, handwriting and times table practice, limits on screen time.
But then if they want to spend 4 hours on a sewing project we can work around that rather than stopping them because 10am is maths time.
One of mine can be quite reluctant to try new things so I definitely strongly encourage some groups or educational trips.

Do you think having adults who have spent most of their childhood around their parents, rather than their own peers (which is what happens at school) is better for their wellbeing?

If so, why?

It’s easy to look back and say that. Secondary school can be a horrific time and she may have done a lot worse if she’d stayed. You really can’t force a child to school. I hope you are ok and she is too. There is always time for her to do something else again.

Thank you for using the correct terminology and explaining why it differs from home schooling 😉
Long term home edder here (just got our eldest through IGCSEs) - do you think you'll do IGCSEs with your children?

I don't think this very recent set up of sending children to schools is automatically going to be better than the way humans lived for thousands of years previously.

@NotBackToSchool further questions if that's ok... does your partner get involved actively in home learning during the day? Does he/she work out of the home? Do you rely on having a higher earning partner to afford to be able to home educate?

Everyone on this thread is talking about education - but I actually think you can probably learn anywhere.

What you don't get from home schooling is the socialising with your peers/an understanding of what a very close relationship that isn't with your parents is like. Most kids have best friends throughout school. I still keep in touch with my best friend from when I was at primary school and I'm in my mid 30s.

The only type of pupil I think would benefit from being with their parents all day is one that was miserable/being bullied. I think most kids love the close friendships they get throughout school, and to deprive them of that seems a bit mean to me.

Of course, different if the child was being severely bullied etc at a mainstream school.

But humans lived in much larger groups in early societies - and children were all together everyday (more similar to school) - definitely not in small family groups with just their parents.

Prior to widespread primary schooling, literacy and numeracy levels were low and children were often in the workplace rather than being educated at home.

My children are with other children every day. And other adults most days.
Not just with their parents.

I think that's better then - but I think a lot of home schooling parents do keep their children close and mainly with them, and it stops their 'best friend' growing up being a peer, instead they have a more intense relationship with their parent. Which is a bit sad to me that they won't have the lovely peer friendships I had at school.

Just my view - as I said, less bothered about the education aspect as I do think kids can learn anywhere

He works from home and we earn similar amounts. He's not really available on a week day to do much more than supervise independent work but gets involved with taking them to classes, reading, trips, making things or sciencey stuff at the weekends.

I don't personally know any families like that but I don't doubt your experiences.

@Newsenmum - thank you it's been a really scary few years but we're coming out the other side. I have to say I don't care if my kids are vets, doctors, dentists etc I just want them to have a good and happy life so all that stress is thrown out of our house!
My brother and I are both on antidepressants, had time off with stress, both in high earning jobs, PhD and medical doctor and honestly, why? What's the point you're always stressed and feel crappy ... let them do something that makes them happy ... and enough money lol

You missed all my questions! 😢

It will depend on whether we do them at home or they go to pre-16 college to do them I guess.
There are a couple of private providers near us that offer practical GCSEs like art and food tech too though.