@Lollipopp Gosh, I don't know what to suggest, so forgive me if this rambles a bit. I didn't talk to my partner, family or friends about the bulimia, and I would have been very embarrassed if they’d tried to talk to me about it, but it depends on the person. I think it tends to be a private thing in any case.
I only spoke to my GP, my dentist, and my shrink. When I told my GP she was initially surprised because she said I always seemed so happy and confident, and I wasn't overweight. I thought if I had told people they'd just say, "You don't need to throw up to control your weight, you're not fat" which wasn't really why I was doing it, as the Maudsley Eating Disorders unit realised.
What started the ball rolling for me was going to my GP and being referred for long-term psychiatric help to deal with the underlying issues, so I would suggest starting there.
I was put on a couple of different anti-depressants until we found the right one (the first two were quite unpleasant), and that was helpful, because it took the edge off my anxiety about control.
CBT didn't work for me, but the following practical things do:
- I leave my purse at home and take a packed lunch and sensible snacks to work so that I don't usually have any money on me to buy bingeing food on the way home.
- I use MyFitnessPal, and set it to maintain my weight, not lose weight. I add calories gained by exercise, but I cut back on carbs to around 60g a day. That helps because carby chocolates, cake and ice cream were my go-to binge foods. After a while I lost my sweet tooth, and they’re not so tempting these days.
- I bought a couple of Kitchen Safes (boxes that lock with timers; highly recommended) and use them to lock up all the foods that my partner enjoys that I might binge on if I come home stressed and the house is empty (peanut butter, biscuits, cheese, butter, etc.). I tell him it’s for the sake of my diet.
- I said I was trying to cut back on spending money, so I asked my partner to keep hold of my debit/credit cards for a few weeks: that REALLY helped at the start because even when I got home I had no access to money.
- I didn’t beat myself up about bingeing and purging if I felt I needed to.
- I joined a gym and started weight training two or three times a week. I have a monthly session with a trainer who checks my form, and occasionally gives me a new routine to go through. He is only interested in how strong I am getting, not on whether I am big or small, which was so liberating.
- I purposely eat things I know I can’t throw up and it stops me stuffing myself with food. For example, fish and chips mushes down, is filling, and is easy to throw up, whereas steak with broccoli gets stuck in your craw and takes longer to digest.
- I play time management and searching games on my iPad because they keep my fingers busy on nights when I come home from work stressed.
- I got a pet. It’s harder to binge when there’s an animal following you round the house that wants to hang out with you.
Sorry, that was a long one. There are loads of other things but I think those are some of the main things that have worked for me.