I moved from the UK to the USA, AMA

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I have been married to my American husband for 22 years and lived in the USA for most of that time. We returned to Europe for a few years but not to the UK. I am originally from London but as my father is from the NE spent lots of my childhood in the NE and Yorkshire. Ask me anything.

I'd agree with most of that last post.

I teach in a private school. There are some parents who seem to see me as the hired help and want to put me in my place, but generally I am exceptionally well respected, and I frequently have multi-millionaires, with PhD's galore, deferring to my opinion and thanking me for my work. I know it's private rather than state school, but in the UK I had so many times when parents belittled or threatened me in some way. There's just a LOT of respect for education (it's a bit obsessive tbh) and therefore teaching is more respected. I see the same attitude in public school as well.

However, I do think that sometimes I miss the subtle social cues. Particularly the marketing guy at my school. I'm not always sure if he's agreed with me or not. He's so polite in his response that I do sometimes wonder what his opinion is. I think it's part of the whole marketing technique of never ruffling feathers.

KissAssAngel absolutely agree with you and being in the States has taught me to change how I frame what I what to say at it reads very differently between the two cultures. For example, it’s very important to do lots of non-controversial rapport building before bringing up anything uncomfortable. Although I said Americans are straightforward, and they are, the way Brits will often dive headfirst into emotionally or politically charged issues can be very alienating to Americans as social harmony is important. So it’s important that they understand first that you are on their side and you have found common ground before bringing up difficult topics.

The extreme of this is some people wanting to be seen as positive and cooperative such as the marketing guy to the point that you are not even sure if you’ve understood each other properly.

One thing I always find funny, at least here on the West Coast is that there is a casual uniform for guys that literally males aged 2 to 82 wear. That is long baggy shorts with t-shirt, socks and sneakers.

It was funny being back in Europe and seeing “old man”clothes again and toddlers wearing very different clothes to their elders.

What advice would you give to someone moving from uk to Texas now?

Where in Texas ivykate? Will you have children with you? If so how old are they? Will you be alone or with a DP and will you both be working or not? Any Americans moving back or are you all from the UK moving?

No children, Dallas, has a driving licence, born in the uk, mid twenties & has a partner working there so want to join them. Not working initially 🙂

How will they be able to work and support themselves without the correct visa, as it sounds like this person is not married? Is this just an extended holiday?

Moveable, they are engaged and trying to work out the logistics and paperwork

It's nice to see someone come on here and talk so positively about the US, as the news here in the UK is permanently dominated by what Trump has said/done and what new revelations have come out about him. He is universally derided and disliked on this side of the Atlantic (with good reason IMO), but he's not America and he's not like most of the Americans I know. When I posted my comment up-thread I didn't 'out' myself as a dual US/UK citizen, married to an American, with dual national kids and who lived and worked there for six years.

I love the American can-do attitude and I miss it a lot. My English family are very fond of moaning and bitching and doing absolutely nothing to fix anything or make it better. It drives me round the bend! Living in America for six years completely changed my outlook - if you don't like your life - change it. If you don't like what politicians are doing get politically engaged - join a local group, stuff envelopes, make a donation to a politician you admire, man the phones for their campaign. So few people here have that attitude and I miss it.

I miss the openness of Americans too - how you always get chatting to someone and often have some really interesting conversations. I'll never forget the first time I went to the US when I was 17. I was with my family flying from London to San Francisco and I was at the back of the plane, probably having a cigarette (this was in 1991), and I got talking to a native American man who happened to be standing next to me. I was so excited that it was the first time I was going to America and there was a bona fide native American on the flight with me! He was great - told me so many wonderful things about his country and I've loved it ever since (in spite of the problems with guns, gangs, Trump, inequality, etc).

Fellow Brit on the East Coast waving!

We have been in Maine nearly 5 years, with absolutely no intention of moving back to the UK. I became a US citizen as soon as I was able to.

I absolutely love the lifestyle and the space. To live like we do here would require a lottery win in the UK.

I have also found the cost of living to be waaay less than the UK. Our property tax is $3900 a year.

I have never been worried about guns, we are gun owners (7in total between us)

Just like in the UK many people can struggle to find politicians they like at a national level, although they often are more positive about local pols that are more directly accountable to them. Of course the last election was very unusual in that both Presidential candidates were very unpopular so I think that had a lot to do with the unexpected outcome.

There is still a large percentage of Americans who don’t vote as they don’t think anyone represents them. Then there is a large group of “Independents” and swing voters who do not affiliate themselves with any party and change their vote accordingly. The Republicans (the party of which President Trump belongs) are only about 30% of the nation. So to stay in power any Democratic or Republican president has to find a way to appeal to voters outside their core constituency.

ivykaty well I think, especially in the current climate the number 1 priority is making sure she has the legal ability to work before moving to the US, otherwise things could get very dicey and expensive if she suddenly needs to fly out again. I wouldn’t consider a permanent move without a work visa. It might be wise to have a “look see” trip if she can possibly afford it to have any idea of where she would be moving to and what work is available. What line of work is she in?

I have been in Dallas but I was 17 (!) so a very long time ago. Very modern, flat Texan city with a healthy economy as far as I am aware. Texas is known for having an excellent public university system and many school districts as also very high quality, so if she plans to have children much of Texas is affordable with good education (although this will always vary from city to city and between school districts). In my state unemployment is below 4% and Texas could be the same.

Hi op! How do you cope with the possibility of encountering a bear in your/a neighbours garden?

bears around domestic areas are really rare. We had one, once, around us (someone set up a facebook page for it!) but we're far too urban (although ti feels rural to me) for real concerns.

I did see one up close at Titan National Park. It wanted to cross a bridge we were on, so just charged across. I freaked out, and ran, screaming. Luckily ti crossed the bridge and disappeared into the woods leaving me running down the trail, screaming about a bear, with no bear in sight. DH was much cooler than me, and simply stepped aside to let it past.

There is a LOT of wildlife, and I'm doing battle to protect my flowers from deer, chipmunks, ants, woodchucks, raccoons and extremes of weather. I just want about 20 feet around my house to put some pretty flowers in, then they can all carry on around me. Unfortunately, they really love my flowers and insist on eating them! The deer around here are not shy, and I've had a full grown stag stare me down on my driveway when I was in my car.

RedneckStumpy thanks for jumping in! Delighted to meet someone in Maine as that is a part of the world I would love to visit as the most Northeasterly state . Have you visited Nova Scotia or Montreal? Definitely places I would love to go to.

Tobe to be perfectly honest I was shocked and amazed that bears come into our area as we have only lived here just over a year and we are really close to a major city. There has just been immense growth in the last 20 years and where we live now I considered “out in the boonies” as a hardened Londoner when I first moved here over 20 years ago. It’s really not but as our state has a relatively low population (1 million less than London) so much of the natural environment such as woodland, lakes and forest remain. I knew a local area was called Bear Creek but somehow in my dimness it never occurred to me that bears are still around so close to the city. It’s not so much that their natural environment is being destroyed (as those areas are protected from development and population density is encouraged in the cities to prevent sprawl) but as there are more people I think they smell all the goodies we bring (including pets which coyotes will eat, don’t leave little Fido in the back yard) and it tempts them out of the woods.

It was after I saw the coyote in broad daylight with one of my kids and went online to indentify it, as I hadn’t seen one before and wanted to know more about them, that my husband found a number of YouTube videos showing bears in our area! There is a popular trail near us that is very wide, so popular with horse riders and families and I saw signs saying “bears crossing” and thought it was a joke. My husband told me that our local neighborhood watch had sent a warning that a bear had been seen on the trail.

Our area is still very wooded and we are on a hill with large lots of usually an acre or more, so “crossing the garden” should be seen in that context, lots of trees and lots of green space with detached homes and horse properties spread out. I heard the coyote before I saw it as sometimes we hear him/her howling at night. He/she looked very healthy and well fed but I hear a coyote killed all the prize hens being raised by a local restaurant that farms a lot of their own produce. I was surprised coyote are spread so far out in the states as I had an impression from road runner cartoons that they were native to the South-West only.

I'd forgotten about the coyotes - we have them, too. Can hear them most nights.

We keep our cats indoors.

Haven’t visited yet, planning to next year.

We have deer, bears and Coyotes too

As much as I love wildlife I was not going out of my way to be close to it, it is just incredible how many large mammals are still close to cities all over the country. Just so much of the US is undeveloped, protected or still raw and wild, especially in comparison to Western Europe.

Brits in the US: what are your favorite American foods?

Some I love:
Peach Pie
Cioppino (seafood stew from San Francisco)
Chowders (all kinds but classic white clam is so good!)