@SoftlyCatchyMonkey1
How do you deal with the emotional side of your job?
I feel very privileged that I get to share the darkest moments of people's lives with them. I'm sure I don't always get it right because what different people need can vary hugely but I certainly think that how you are with people during this time can make a huge difference to how they cope. I hope that the majority of the time the fact that I really care about my patients comes across and helps them. As to how I copied with my own emotions, mostly I go home, hug my husband and children, and feel thankful for our current good health. Certain people get to me though, usually those who I can relate to in some way. I've cried on more than one occasion about particular patients (I've welled up in front of some but never actually cried) but ultimately I need to be able to detach in some way so I can do the best for them.
Does it affect the way you are with some patients if they're particularly anxious?
Funnily enough I find people who are openly anxious or scared easier to deal with than those who internalise everything. Probably because that's more my own personality and I can relate to it more. I try and read what they want and talk as much or as little as they need. Some want hugs, I am comfortable with this if they instigate it but I wouldn't instigate it myself.
Did you get training into how you deal with patient fear and dread?
Not formally. I spent a lot of my early training observing others do this and learnt from both the good and bad consultations. I have been observed by my bosses then who gave me pointers. Now I ask my breast care nurses for feedback from time to time, both positive and negative, to make sure I do the best I can.
And questions with answers that can't be sugar coated?
This can be hard. But I think you have to be honest. I'll look them in the eye and speak clearly, in language they will understand (based on what they have asked and what they know already). You're right that there are some things that cannot be sugar coated but usually people don't ask questions when they are not ready for the answer. Usually people value honesty, and as long as you deliver the news with sensitivity it's better not to shy away from difficult discussions