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Original poster

This makes me bang my heAD against the wall in depressed weariness, you?

31 replies

Adair · 12/04/2010 07:45

Apologies if it has already been mentioned

here

I have one of each. And while I am starting to see differences in how they approach some things, there are also many things that are the same - just as there are also many differences between dd and her female friends. And so WHY DOES IT FREAKIN' MATTER?!

Am also sick and tired that when ds destroys things it is seen admiringly as if he is 'experimenting with the world around him' but dd is admonished for being naughty (possibly even by me occasionally ). How did all the stupid things boys do get to be the best way - yet, just as in this article, there is a kind of dismissive tone of the 'good little girls' who sit quietly and play even though they raise how they are asking questions and engaging just as vigourously with the world. But because they are not climbing... BAH. And FWIW my dd climbs anyway. A LOT.

It is just so LIMITING and frustrating to interpret behaviour because of gender. Even the psychologist did it - why couldn't she say 'oh boys want to play with a stick by throwing it and waving it* (my dd will do this too) but girls will want to make it into patterns or use it in imaginative play' rather than this guns and teacups bollocks.

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh, I love this topic where I can rant. It's just SO FUCKING DEPRESSING. And people just accept it without CHALLENGING IT.

At dd's party yesterday, the girls were the 'princesses' and the boys were the 'baddie boys'WTF??!!!! Thankfully, me and another mum jumped in to suggest some alternatives (that they were superhero princesses like in Shrek). But jeez.

OP posts:
choosyfloosy · 12/04/2010 08:38

ok i quite liked the article, sorry

especially Bibi vdZ's bit where she's saying exactly this, that any difference between the genders is being widened and wedged open for commercial reasons

it would be nice though if someone had tried the same thing with a six-month old baby - any difference might have been measurable but would have been miniscule surely?

overmydeadbody · 12/04/2010 08:34

You know, those parents in that article had different experiences because the children where different, regardless of their gender, it just happened that the boys where noisy active ones and the girls where quieter ones. They cannot make conclusinos about all girls and all boys based on that. Hoiw stupidly unscientific.

overmydeadbody · 12/04/2010 08:30

my favourite colour is torquise too Closely followed by pink and I am not a girly girl and always climbed trees as a girl.

What does get to me is that it seems more socially acceptable for parents of girls to buy them 'boy's' things, even dress them in 'boys' clothes etc., but it's still not socially acceptable to do the same with a boy, why is that I wonder?

Why can't my DS choose a pink toothbrush in boots and buy it without the checkout girl commenting? It wouldn't have happened if DS was a girl and had chosen a green toothbrush would it?

Original poster
Adair · 12/04/2010 08:06

You are right overmydeadbody, and actually you have reminded me of my great bugbear that sometimes we go on about the subjugation of women in history and forget to mention all the people who DID challenge it. Need to do lots and lots of reading - this topic is fantastic inspiration.

Dd loves pink - of course. Ds does too. I buy more pink now that I have a boy . But wholeheartedly agree girl-life has become unnecessarily overwhelmingly pink. I try to mitigate by sharing everyone else's favourite colour (mine is turquoise, daddy's is purple) and saying ooh yes pink is nice, but what other colours too?

OP posts:
overmydeadbody · 12/04/2010 07:59

I feel your pain.

But not everyone just accepts it, a lot of people do challenge these stupid stereotypes, maybe someday we will overthrow these and our grandchildren's grandchildren won't have to fight these stereotypes.

skidoodly · 12/04/2010 07:55

I feel pretty much exactly the same.

Every time I see a set of pink mega blocks I feel a red mist descend.