A Man in a dress- how would you feel?

But calling a dress a “feminine expression “
is only that within the boundaries of current western society

it’s a pity men can’t be allowed to wear dresses. Without it being seen as expression of fenininity

There is a picture of Grayson Perry wearing a skirt and a black codpiece to a children’s charity event. I am never accepting that as a reasonable choice. Keep the fetish away from others please.

I love seeing a man in a kilt, would think nothing about a priest in his robes or a Muslim man wearing a shalwar kameez, dishdasha or djelabba. That’s because those are items of clothing that are made for males. It’s disingenuous to say people can wear whatever they feel comfortable in and their sex shouldn’t come into it, because we do wear clothes for particular sexes generally. Women wear trousers in many forms now, but those trousers are designed for the female form which is different than the male form. My DH and I are wearing almost identical outfits today, because our items are unisex.
If a man decided that he was going to wear a dress made for a woman he would be making a point, because it’s occupied that men in many societies don’t wear dresses. We used to call those men transvestites but we’re not allowed to do that now because of ‘progress’. Transvestitism has a sexual motivation.

While I suspect you're angling at internalised misogyny because gender non conforming men in presentation are a no no but women aren't even in these gender critical parts of the world the fact that many here are only comfortable if the female coded attire isn't sexualised/overly feminine points to something else. And that something is still internalised misogyny but as it to pertains to feminine aesthetic expression. I would put my house on most of these same people are 'uncomfortable' with females expressing overt sexuality in presentation as well.

The demeaning of feminine expression AKA femmephobia has a long history rooted in the systemic devaluation of traits, behaviours and aesthetics associated with women and femininity. Historically, patriarchal structures have positioned masculinity as the universal human standard leaving femininity to be viewed as inferior, superficial, or manipulative.

Describing feminine traits, behaviours and aesthetics as purely an indoctrinated 'stereotype' or a sexual perversion is simply another form of femmephobia which is regularly expressed on this forum.

That they can't conceive of an inclination towards feminine expression being just a simple innate preference no different to preferring vanilla ice cream to chocolate rather than some pathology ought to tell you something.

It’s just natural suspicion- if you haven’t been here long you probably wouldn’t appreciate the amount of abuse we get here including posters turning up just to try and get people banned or to prove how transphobic mumsnet is. It really is a problem so don’t take the scepticism personally. You haven’t done anything wrong but many of the troll posts start with apparent innocence!

Grayson Perry springs to mind and much as I love his art, his programmes, I just think he looks a bit "wrong" when he wears a dress. Like you, I accept it's his choice but that's how I feel

At my old job the guy I used to sit next to wore skirts and blouses and carried a handbag. He was lovely, and good at his job.

I didn't have any particular feelings about the way he chose to dress, aside from mild surprise at first.

Not bother me at all.

Forgetting the arty types who get away with it I would imagine that in the current climate a man who wanted to start dressing in women’s clothes would be dipping a toe in the water. I would assume he would then go on to adopt the rest of the ideology in time.

It’s sad really that it’s a thing - that clothes are so restrictive

I remember seeing a Ben Fogle programme a while back and he stayed with a guy who lived in an alternative community in the states. The majority of the time he wore men’s clothes but occasionally wore women’s clothes. He explained that’d he’d had a difficult childhood and wearing these clothes were a comfort / link back to his mum. But he didn’t seem that he ever considered himself to be a woman etc so I thought it was fine.

But I’d also have an issue if it was my DH!

I love a man in a dress - it takes guts and individuality to go out like that, think David Bowie vibes, creative and fearless.

Yes, just a young man showboating and daring to be a little bit subversive - but without excessive ego or performance attached.

Damiano David ( formerly of Maneskin) regularly wore make up and 'feminine' coded clothing but always came across as incredibly masculine at the same time ( ...and very sexy.....)

I wouldn’t be that bothered tbh, unless it was sexualised clothing not appropriate to the occasion.
I wouldn’t be too keen on my DH doing it however as I would find it very unattractive in a sexual partner.

@Shortshriftandlethal , you’ve just reminded me that I saw a teenage lad in Brighton wearing a skirt recently. Obviously seeing men wearing women’s clothes isn’t at all unusual in Brighton, but what was more unusual about this was that he didn’t seem to be trying to look like or pass as a woman. He had on a skirt, but everything else about his presentation was masculine or neutral. So, stereotypically male hairstyle, shoes, top and jacket, not wearing make up etc. I quite admired that because it seemed artistic rather than fetishistic.

a man wearing a dress IS a statement depending on the dress a fairly major one (exception here for kilts).
a woman wearing a men’s suit (not a feminine version) is equally a statement.
btw I call BS on being new, only read a few posts etc. MN is very well known for GC views especially in the FS&G section.

I think there would have to be an element of conscious boundary breaking nature in such an act ( for a man) because the weight of 'taboo' associated with it is still quite pronounced. You can easily imagine a pop or rock star doing wearing a dress ( and they have done, and do) because their public persona tends to involve a very self consciously 'styled' display that aims to draw attention. They 'get away with it' because overt performance is their occupation.

I saw a young man wearing a skirt once and it was quite nice and refreshing to see him not caring about negative attention from other men, and neither was he doing it in an overly "look at me" kind of way. However it is rare to see a man wear a dress or skirt in such a way, normally it is only men who you know are consciously trying to 'identify as' women who do so......and the sexualised and fetishistic nature of the presentation is always very obvious, and draws the attention - but in an icky/creepy kind of way that you associate with male sexual transgression ( and which most women are very familiar with).

I think there is a chasm between being 'fashion forward' and dressing up as a woman.

I go to a local pub quiz and there's a couple who go I've known for years. He recently started turning up in women's clothes, make up, growing breasts, etc. They're a lovely couple and clearly devoted. He's still called "Paul" by his wife and everyone else.
I struggle with it tbh. I treat him the same as I always used to though I've noticed some performative fawning by some women. I just feel so bad for his wife. I would feel utterly humiliated in her position.

I was a teenager in the 70s, we all cross dressed but this is different.

I wouldn't mind what he wanted to wear but I would care what negative reactions my husband might get from others out in public and how they would affect him, and me if I was with him.

We’ve got a hairdresser near me who dresses this way too - he looks great. He has a strong, slightly punky, masculine look.