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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Adam Kay

162 replies

AsTreesWalking · 18/06/2023 12:27

Anyone hear Desert Island Discs this morning? He's quite an interesting fellow, who resigned as a doctor in obstetrics because he couldn't bear his grief over deaths of babies and mothers.
Imagine my surprise-disbelief- to hear that he and his husband have 2 babies under a year old from 2 surrogate mothers. And he actually said that he hopes the children will forgive any mistakes they will make...

OP posts:
StephanieSuperpowers · 19/06/2023 16:08

I think there's a bit of a difference between being offensive to make a point and vulgar abuse. I think Adam Kay's routine is the latter. I wouldn't want to ban it, but I also wouldn't glorify the significance of what he's doing. There's no deeper meaning, they're just making incredibly distasteful, personal remarks about women's bodies - ho ho ho.

FannyCann · 19/06/2023 16:02

Meant to add it takes a lot more talent to be genuinely funny whilst remaining inoffensive.

DarkDayforMN · 19/06/2023 15:58

So it was a bad joke, it doesn't necessarily represent his views.

Don't you mean "So it was several hundred bad jokes, they don't necessarily represent his views?"

FannyCann · 19/06/2023 15:58

Well of course comedians are free to make bad taste jokes but they take the risk of their work drying up.

Some comedians manage to be very funny without being crude or offensive. They tend to be the ones with an audience that really loves them and stays with them longer term.

NutellaEllaElla · 19/06/2023 15:19

Agreed

BernardBlacksMolluscs · 19/06/2023 15:17

NutellaEllaElla · 19/06/2023 15:11

So it was a bad joke, it doesn't necessarily represent his views. That's the risk of comedy and I'm sure the above mentioned male comedians can accept that. I'm a free speech advocate, I don't approve of censorship.

Neither do i

I strongly approve of being able to say that things are

  1. sexist
  2. stupidly offensive
  3. shit
BernardBlacksMolluscs · 19/06/2023 15:16

DarkDayforMN · 19/06/2023 13:22

Well there's a conceit in this type of offensive comedy, where it wouldn't be funny if it was believed to be true.

I wonder if all the people making excuses for this would be equally comfortable with someone making “comedically” disgusting remarks targeting gay men instead of women.

Indeed

or heelarious Jim Davidson style comedy about black people

I expect it’s just naive to judge ol’ Jim on his racist output, right? It’s just his style of comedy, he doesn’t really think it’s true

NutellaEllaElla · 19/06/2023 15:11

So it was a bad joke, it doesn't necessarily represent his views. That's the risk of comedy and I'm sure the above mentioned male comedians can accept that. I'm a free speech advocate, I don't approve of censorship.

JanesLittleGirl · 19/06/2023 15:01

NutellaEllaElla · 19/06/2023 14:39

There are comedians who joke about paedophilia and the Holocaust etc which, if taken seriously, are disgusting.

I don't know if Jimmy Carr expected not to be taken seriously when he 'joked' about the slaughter of Roma in the Holocaust but it was universally condemned. Do you feel like justifying it? Maybe just a bit of bants?

There are times when wrong is wrong. Menstrual Rag is an example.

NutellaEllaElla · 19/06/2023 14:39

There are comedians who joke about paedophilia and the Holocaust etc which, if taken seriously, are disgusting.

FannyCann · 19/06/2023 14:21

Two surrogates. At the same time. I wonder why, seems a bit belt and braces in case something went wrong with one of the pregnancies. Thank heavens he isn’t practising OBGYN any more, his utter distain and abhorrence for women’s bodies is clear.

I think this is increasingly common among gay men so they get one each. Using each person's sperm.
They seem to have woken up to realising that going for a BOGOF and having twins isn't such a good idea due to increased risks of premature birth and other medical complications.
Costs twice as much obviously so some will still seek the bargain option.
Obviously one would expect and on/gyn to be aware of the problems associated with twins.

I wonder if they each claim their own in the event of a divorce 🤔

Adam Kay
DarkDayforMN · 19/06/2023 13:22

Well there's a conceit in this type of offensive comedy, where it wouldn't be funny if it was believed to be true.

I wonder if all the people making excuses for this would be equally comfortable with someone making “comedically” disgusting remarks targeting gay men instead of women.

viques · 19/06/2023 12:36

HowardKirksConscience · 19/06/2023 12:34

That was my point to the person I was replying to. I wasn’t criticising judgment of his actions. You just took it that way. The thread is about his actions, which most of us despise.

I couldn’t give a shiny shit about any aspect of him EXCEPT his actions, which are despicable.

Don’t assume people are arguing with you 😉

Sorry, yes, I should have read more carefully.

HowardKirksConscience · 19/06/2023 12:34

viques · 19/06/2023 12:20

How else are you supposed to judge people? On their star sign? His actions , words and opinions are public knowledge, if he didn’t want to be judged on them he should have kept them to himself.

That was my point to the person I was replying to. I wasn’t criticising judgment of his actions. You just took it that way. The thread is about his actions, which most of us despise.

I couldn’t give a shiny shit about any aspect of him EXCEPT his actions, which are despicable.

Don’t assume people are arguing with you 😉

TheLemon · 19/06/2023 12:28

They have clearly softened the TV show, to give him his "politically correct" comeuppance with being reported to the GMC. Rightly so, because the book was uncomfortably misogynistic, I watched the first episode, and was worried it was going to be as unpleasant as the book, but a friend encouraged me to stick with it.

I'm glad I did, because the TV show was actually pretty good in the end and held a mirror up to the bad behaviour in a way the book didn't. However, I think he's a nasty piece of work who shouldn't be let near women .

viques · 19/06/2023 12:20

HowardKirksConscience · 19/06/2023 12:17

The entire thread is full of people judging him on his actions.

How else are you supposed to judge people? On their star sign? His actions , words and opinions are public knowledge, if he didn’t want to be judged on them he should have kept them to himself.

nauticant · 19/06/2023 12:18

I had a look to see how it had gone down on Twitter. The programme got a surprising lack of engagement from the audience. Compared to your typical guest who can be categorised into a nice/progressive box, it looks like the audience were noticeably unimpressed.

HowardKirksConscience · 19/06/2023 12:17

NutellaEllaElla · 19/06/2023 11:30

Well there's a conceit in this type of offensive comedy, where it wouldn't be funny if it was believed to be true. The pun is based on the outrageousness of the claim, alongside the unspoken agreement that you don't really mean it.

At the end of the day, rather than determinedly taking comedy seriously, which isn't a good look. Why not judge on actions. He has done plenty to judge.

The entire thread is full of people judging him on his actions.

NutellaEllaElla · 19/06/2023 12:07

Jesus I regret wading in. The behaviours I'm referring to are in some part, Surrogacy. I'm not saying he's a great guy, but I'm saying that taking what he says during a comedy show as a serious indication of his morals, is stupid. This polarising thing is bullshit.

WhenIWasAFieldMyself · 19/06/2023 12:03

NutellaEllaElla · 19/06/2023 11:30

Well there's a conceit in this type of offensive comedy, where it wouldn't be funny if it was believed to be true. The pun is based on the outrageousness of the claim, alongside the unspoken agreement that you don't really mean it.

At the end of the day, rather than determinedly taking comedy seriously, which isn't a good look. Why not judge on actions. He has done plenty to judge.

What other actions are there to judge? He's told us about his time as a Junior Doctor out of which experience he comes certainly not as a credit to his profession. He's shown us what passes for humour in his sick, warped head. He's just bought two children.

He's told us who he is. Unequivocally.
And I believe him.

Helleofabore · 19/06/2023 11:40

ArabeIIaScott · 18/06/2023 14:13

https://unherd.com/2022/02/adam-kays-dangerous-misogyny/

'Women are reduced, consciously or not, to a series of stinking and repulsive orifices with imbeciles attached to them. The misogyny — the dehumanisation I am sure kills women — is relentless.'

Yes. Quite.

A class A misogynist. And even more so using women’s bodies to deliver him children on demand.

NutellaEllaElla · 19/06/2023 11:30

Well there's a conceit in this type of offensive comedy, where it wouldn't be funny if it was believed to be true. The pun is based on the outrageousness of the claim, alongside the unspoken agreement that you don't really mean it.

At the end of the day, rather than determinedly taking comedy seriously, which isn't a good look. Why not judge on actions. He has done plenty to judge.

Datun · 19/06/2023 10:38

ArabeIIaScott · 18/06/2023 14:13

https://unherd.com/2022/02/adam-kays-dangerous-misogyny/

'Women are reduced, consciously or not, to a series of stinking and repulsive orifices with imbeciles attached to them. The misogyny — the dehumanisation I am sure kills women — is relentless.'

Christ. What a cunt.

DipsyLaLaPo · 19/06/2023 10:34

Agree with you there, it is gross and if you aren't clever enough to foresee future consequences then you shouldn't dabble in it. Frankie Boyle knows what he is doing and doubles down. For this, I have a small amount more respect for it. Kay is trying to hide his past and appear as an NHS hero type

WhenIWasAFieldMyself · 19/06/2023 10:31

viques · 19/06/2023 09:41

Two surrogates. At the same time. I wonder why, seems a bit belt and braces in case something went wrong with one of the pregnancies. Thank heavens he isn’t practising OBGYN any more, his utter distain and abhorrence for women’s bodies is clear.

Reading his books is the main reason I will not see a male doctor for gynae issues. Ever again.
So slow handclap for that to the totes hilaires Mr. Kay.