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Original poster

CAHMS/SEN workshop worries. (TW)

66 replies

BreadMeUp · 24/04/2023 08:03

So DD is in Yr 9. She's on SEN register at school, waiting on autism referral, eating disorder ect.

We've had a lot of shit with her regarding gender identity. She's possibly autistic, very easily influenced and has sexual trauma history :(

School arranged for her to attend an art therapy course through a local charity and CAHMS.

There was the usual virtue signalling on the forms. Gender. Pronouns etc.

But I've just got the activity schedule for the project and the theme is 'Identity'

Would I be an absolute didk of I rang and asked them to clarify what that means and ask if 'gender identity' is going to be involved.

Because if it is she absolutely isn't attending. I'm sick to my back teeth of this bollocks being peddelled at vulnerable kids.

OP posts:
Original poster
BreadMeUp · 24/04/2023 10:42

Am now waiting for a call back from school. I'm going to ask them if DD is partaking in all this at school without my knowledge, as there have been a few hints from her HOY.

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Original poster
BreadMeUp · 24/04/2023 10:23

So I rang and spoke to a very nice lady I asked her what exactly does the project 'identity' entails.

She said home life, interests and anything else the kids want to incluse such as..gender identity 🙄

I explained all about DD and why I feel its not appropriate for ND teens to pushed into this discussion time and time again.

I said I wasn't sure if DD would be attending now, which is a shame because it's something that seems really up her street.

She is getting the woman who actually runs the course, who will be hosting and talking to the kids, to call me back.

So I will ask her opinions and see if I feel she is likely to bring this up.

Although I'm 90% sure it will be included because it's all the rage for kids to talk about isn't it.

I've just sat in the garden and cried.

Why can't they do literally any other topic.

They're kids for fucks sake.

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FunnyTalks · 24/04/2023 09:49

Tricky. I have worked with similar kids and alongside therapists. "Identity" has always been an important aspect of understanding teens and therapists will definitely feel the need to cover it. It isn't necessarily about gender ID at all, I would say the problem is as simple as whether the therapists themselves believe in gender ideology or not.

The concern is that if they do believe, even if they think they are being neutral, they may ask questions which are actually quite leading to your DD such as "does your gender ID match your sex at birth" which obviously presupposes a belief in gender ID and heavily suggests that the only way to express discomfort with sex stereotypes is to say "no".

I would trawl the website of the charity and search for the therapists too if you can. By and large, believers in gender ID like to proclaim this loudly. Check the language and the equalities policies.

Before you speak to them, is it worth writing down points about why you don't consent for the therapists to talk about gender ID with DD? eg Family beliefs; acceptance of difference and homosexuality without needing to modify body; vulnerability due to SEN and trauma; inappropriate to be led on a path that can lead to medication, surgery and sterilisation as a child ESPECIALLY in light of her vulnerabilities; understand that teens often express trauma through gender stuff, please work with the actual trauma as transition is rarely the answer for a teen.

Original poster
BreadMeUp · 24/04/2023 09:01

Urgh got myself all prepped to ring now and they don't even open till 10am.

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Original poster
BreadMeUp · 24/04/2023 08:36

I'll see what they say. Maybe I'll insist I stay for the opening session.

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AlisonDonut · 24/04/2023 08:35

Isn't inward looking 'identity' all part of the problem?

I'd pull her out of it anyway - even if they say it isn't it probably is.

Original poster
BreadMeUp · 24/04/2023 08:24

Starlightstarbright1 · 24/04/2023 08:21

Just say you need more information on the session . You don't need to explain why . If it becomes gender identity then you can just say. My child won't be attending. Her issues are not gender indenity .

As a parent of a child with autism.. i would do exactly this

But I feel they're very sly with parents.

I don't think they would come out as say that unless pressed. I was told by school directly they have many students who use different pronouns at school and the parents have no idea.
Its all so cloak and dagger.

OP posts:
Starlightstarbright1 · 24/04/2023 08:21

Just say you need more information on the session . You don't need to explain why . If it becomes gender identity then you can just say. My child won't be attending. Her issues are not gender indenity .

As a parent of a child with autism.. i would do exactly this

Original poster
BreadMeUp · 24/04/2023 08:17

It's an art charity for people with SN.

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Original poster
BreadMeUp · 24/04/2023 08:17

Soontobe60 · 24/04/2023 08:14

What’s the charity running the course?

I don't want to say as its a small local charity and would be too identifying.

They're just a small local, independent.

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Soontobe60 · 24/04/2023 08:14

What’s the charity running the course?

Original poster
BreadMeUp · 24/04/2023 08:14

Any ideas on what I should actually say?

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Original poster
BreadMeUp · 24/04/2023 08:13

It's a broad term isn't it but these days it seems like that's the only kind of identity that matters.

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Whaeanui · 24/04/2023 08:13

I absolutely would ask too. Don’t hesitate when it comes to your children.

PaleBlueMoonlight · 24/04/2023 08:12

I absolutely would.

lanadelgrey · 24/04/2023 08:05

I would!