Are you a closet Gender Critical?

Nope, I'm very vocal about this and will talk about it whenever I get the opportunity. I
couldn't give a fuck if some dick pandering handmaiden thinks I'm transphobic.
They need to start thinking of excuses as to why they advocate for rapists in female prisons and the sterilisation and a lifelong medical path for youngsters as the sunlight is getting brighter by the day.

Agreed. I used to actually be a quite aggressive trans rights activist. I became gender critical after my pregnancy. I was quite sick and my trans women friends were quite mean. One of them even giggled when I explained that my daughter and I almost died when I gave birth. They treated me very differently when I was pregnant. I sure the excuse was that my pregnancy triggered their dysphoria. But where does one draw the line between dysphoria and just plain misogyny?

I think I really did want to think of them as women. But I couldn’t after that. Another factor was postpartum and breastfeeding. My husband and I had this ideal gender balanced vision of feeding and caring for the baby. We were naive. The fourth trimester is real. That baby did not care that the man standing next to her was her father. All she knew was he was NOT the vessel that she was familiar with and she very much wanted her mother for the first 3 months of her life. I guess even newborns are transphobic!

We tried to evenly split the feeding to help dad bond with baby. But she had very severe GERD. It didn’t matter what kind of formula we used. She would vomit the entire feed every single time. Breastfeeding was a matter of life or death for her. The stress of trying to produce enough milk and feeding her through bleeding nipples and having to wake up exhausted every night while my husband slept through because his biology did not call for breastfeeding. Knowing that he would if he could but there were no options made me proper into a mean no good terfy woman.

The fact is that the majority burden of raising the child for at least the first year rests squarely on the mother’s shoulders. My husband is a very loving helpful man. He helps with the chores, does the dishes and cooks without being asked. He works full time and is far from lazy. He is now very involved with his daughter’s upbringing. I think it was a wake up call for him as well because I had a rough pregnancy and he wanted me to relax while he took the burden off.

But reproduction is a VERY SEX BASED EXPERIENCE. One that you can’t identify your way out of.

Which is why we need sex based rights. My husband often felt beside himself and guilty because he couldn’t do the things he thought he could. He could not breastfeed for me. He could not give his child the comfort she was seeking because that child knew who it’s mother was.

Biology NOT SOCIETAL NORMS forced us to take on gendered roles. As unpleasant as they are for some of us they exist for a reason. And that does not mean I’m advocating that we get locked into these but I’m saying that we didn’t just invent these from thin air.

"I'm a woman who isn't hysterical about silly nonsense. I've not been negatively impacted by trans women in any way shape or form. Your mindless bigotry is annoying and tedious."

Oh do give yourself a certificate and badge. There's probably even some sexist shop that actually has awards for non hysterical women.

Are the women who have lost out on their place in a race, competition, or in the podium hysterical?

Are the women in prisons who can't sleep at night as a convicted sex offenders lies a few metres away staring at them? The women who no longer go to classes or exercise when they used to enjoy it, because they are trying to avoid any opportunities that may give that sex offender to approach and pester them?

Are the girls (some only 16) who were forced to accept "Annie" watch them rotate slowly in paper pants and nothing else for their spray tan hysterical when they felt uncomfortable? And now on learning he was rapist awaiting trail, hysterical?

Are the parents of the child victims of Katie Dolatowski hysterical? The dad of the 10yr old who was assaulted and stripped in a women's toilets before he realised his daughter was in grave danger and stepped in? Is he hysterical or is it just women who aren't allowed to raise concerns?

I am a woman. I am not hysterical. But I am angry, and scared.

I might have a gynae cancer. I have spent a lot of time in hospital and a lot of time having intrusive, invasive and embarrassing tests. My main gynaecologist is male. He's clearly a very knowledgeable, experienced man. He's kind and respectful. But every single time he exams me, sticks all sorts of instruments into my vagina and uterus, and has me raised in a chair with my legs spread and genitalia exposed, there is a biological woman or 2 present to support me. To chaperone him and protect him from unfounded allegation, and to support me. I feel better because they are there. When they tell me what the pain or sensations may be like it rings true and I feel supported. When he tells me what the pain is like I mentally roll my eyes because he cannot know. It makes a difference. It matters to me. If those people were men who felt like women, I would feel alone, unsupported, possibly degraded and humiliated by the extreme exposure in front of males. Acknowledging and expressing that doesn't make me transphobic. I'm not hysterical.

@ElonsMusky who THE HELL are you to tell me that?

And do you know what? If you want and are comfortable with men saying they're women, entering your single sex spaces, performing your smear, your mammogram, you pelvic floor urodynamics, being in the bed next to you as you bleed vaginally and have to be helped change your pad or even have clots removed from your vagina with speculum and forceps with only a curtain between you (and no guarantee they won't be able to see and hear things as you talk about your pregnancy and sexual history), being in the shared changing rooms as you try bras on, being in the toilets as you help your tween daughter cope with her first period, degrade your age/sex grading at parkrun, be your women's officer at work or in a union, take your place on the "women in management" course at work, be there with their male socialisation and entitlement on the "women's bike maintenance" course you go on etc etc, then great for you. You go right ahead and never ask for anything single sex.

But you're still not right to take the option for single sex provision from me, my daughters and other women who want that.

And like the poster upthread, I read stuff on SM and am a member of most of the GC groups, but I prefer the F2F conversation only if it comes up.

Police here.
I stood up in the lecture theatre at a diversity day and challenged the Stonewall rep several years ago. It was embarrassing, my cheeks were hot, but I cited certain cases where women had been harmed by men posing as women and emphasised that the criminal justice system had the responsibility to acknowledge risk and protect women.
People shook their heads and sighed, but nothing bad happened to me.
Stonewall rep (man) didn't like what I said.
Oh well.

Respectfully, get a grip.

What has she got to get a grip about?

Respectfully, get a grip.

Yes, more or less. I’m in France though, which hasn’t gone anything like as insane as Anglophone countries seem to have. There is no teaching of gender woo in schools here: in fact our teachers have been specifically told that unless it has been specifically approved by a child’s psychiatrist etc they should not use different pronouns etc just because the child, or even their parent, asks. I work with some American teachers who ignore this, and are all jumping to ‘be kind’ but tbh they are putting themselves at risk by doing so. In our school we are dealing exclusively with F to M teenagers: it’s so clear that it’s contagious and that the girls doing this are deeply unhappy and troubled. Frankly it’s shit being a girl in high school if you don’t fit in, especially in looks.

on the other M to F side… the protection of single-sex spaces for females is my line in the sand. That’s the boundary I argue for, openly. Oh and I don’t like drag queens, and thought Eveyones Taking About Jamie (which were went to see on a school trip) was a lot of disengenuous, sanctimonious twaddle, albeit with good songs and dancing.

You’re entitled to your opinion. You may paint us as monsters if you like so you don’t have to think about the consequences of your actions. But that is something I think we can all live with. Feminism was never meant to be trendy. Historically speaking feminists were always considered “radical” and “evil no good man haters”. The fact that it’s cool and the in thing for the first time in history should be the red flag here for you.

The water mainstream feminists are drinking has been contaminated. They are puppets on strings doing the work of men but sold the idea that they are fighting for “women’s” rights.

That's not what you are doing.

I’d say I’m trying to be ‘smart’, with friends, at work and my child’s school. My family I’m open with.

Some friends are definitely not GC and have kids who identify as trans or non binary - and every one of them I can see from the outside it is causing massive problems, the parents are being extremely supportive, but let’s just say it’s not going well all around and they are in crisis and would not want me expressing anything other than listening to them, and don’t want my opinion.

At work I’m trying to re establish myself. I draw the line at ticking certain boxes like my pronouns, and question gently at the minute. But until I am more secure no one would listen to me, so there would be no point.

At my child’s school, I am on the watch for any safeguarding - wherever it comes from so have deliberately asked that any sex/relationship/wellbeing etc education is alerted to me first before I consent to it. But I haven’t said why. My child is SEN so I’ve just said I’m extra cautious as they are particularly vulnerable.

There's nothing hateful about protecting our hard fought for women's rights 🙄

👏👏👏

Where's your evidence for this claim? Surely GC views are now protected? ( see Maya Forstaters recent case )

I have worked with adult Lesbians who have told me that they were so confused in their early teens and hated anything traditionally feminine at that time (clothes, hair etc). As they got older and gained confidence, they became clear that they were/are Lesbian and happy with that. They commented that if their confused early teens had coincided with todays ‘trans movement’, they would have declared themselves boys, been very keen to have hormone blockers, chest binding and eventually surgery. They are relieved it didn’t because it would have absolutely been wrong for them. Worth reflecting on this.

I have to be otherwise my trans child would never talk to me again.

I'm horrified how their beautiful body had been militated, how brainwashed they are - I am so sad and I talk to a couple of people about it my husband is one and my oldest daughter the other. They agree but we go along with it to keep the status quo

We have been heartbroken by all of this and it's fucking bonkers, pp said it's the emperors new clothes; it is.

I hate being forced by law to lie about what's in front of my own eyes. I hate it all. It's a fucking cult.

No, because I know normal adults who know science.

i have a transgender friend on fb who has gone through GRC. I want to support him whilst staying GC. i don't know how to do it.

Would you not just treat it like any other belief system? If you had a Muslim or Hindu friend (if you are neither of these), would you struggle to remain friends, with the understanding that they have their beliefs that you don't share, you have different (lack of) beliefs that they do not share; and you respect and accept that you are different individuals, with different perspectives on things, and that neither of you will seek to force the other to 'convert' to your own beliefs nor expect to cancel, shut down, defame or otherwise disrespect the other?

No Muslim I've ever known has expected me to come to the mosque for daily prayers - much less demanded to know why I'm a 'bigot' for not doing 'the right thing'.

Trans - as in presuming somebody to be the opposite sex and thus qualify to use single-sex spaces for the opposite sex to them - seems to be the only belief system whereby people are not allowed to not follow it. We've become so inured to the fact that people feel forced to keep quiet about not following this belief system for fear of losing their livelihoods, all sense of normality and supposedly democratic TRUE tolerance has disappeared.

We live in a world now where Lord Winston - eminent professor, medical doctor and scientist of decades' standing - can be shouted down and challenged for his understanding of clear proven biological facts by people less than a third of his age, with the only result being an acknowledgement that his 'views' will be 'very controversial'!!

How did we ever come to this? It's the modern equivalent of the baying mob demanding that the 'witch' be burned, because she's old, unmarried and has a cat, so what more proof could anybody possibly need?!

Every trans person I know has a medical diagnosis of gender dysphoria. The only one I've ever really spoken to about it, my coworker, said transition saved her from crippling depression and anxiety and now she's generally pretty happy with life.

This is a genuine question: how is gender dysphoria medically diagnosed? Is there a physical test that can be run which enables the HCP to unequivocally determine the presence (or otherwise) of GD - as would be possible for most illnesses and conditions - or is it just based on what the patient reports?

Otherwise, surely, instead of being able to declare yourself as trans, it would just be a slightly more circuitous route, whereby you tell a medic that you feel you are trans - and I'm guessing that any lack of acceptance or affirmation on their part would be skating perilously close to accusations of 'conversion therapy' - and then the medic signs it off for you with their pen instead of you doing it with your own?

Could there actually be a scenario where, in spite of the patient insisting that they are trans, the doctor could overrule it with his/her professional opinion and declare that they are actually not trans - with impunity and with their professional ability and integrity fully respected?

Have I misunderstood this in some way?

Thanks for confirming that you think women's concerns about single sex services being made mixed sex without our consent is 'transphobic'.

As an insult, its lost any power it used to have.

stop masking your transphobia behind faux concerns and just own it. I'd have more respect for you then.

You “haven’t been negatively effected”, so that’s okay. Does that apply to everything else damaging that you personally haven’t been negatively effected by? FFS!