Complications from trans surgery!

I can’t say I care. Anyone that isn’t happy in their body is never going to be happy in one of the opposite sex anyway 🤷‍♀️

Not long ago, I found a 14 year old posting on twitter who honestly, genuinely believed that vaginoplasty (penile inversion surgery) could be reversed. Just put the penis back together, the way it was before.

These kids are so naïve, and honestly, when I think back to being 14, I didn't have any idea either.

I remember GiGi Gorgeous did a YouTube video ages ago about how she nearly had bottom surgery but didn’t and the reasons she hasn’t and would never do it. Very interesting POV. Although I have seen that her spouse has recently had surgery which is also very interesting.

Spoken like a mature, sensible, well-informed person with plenty of life experience and a healthy amount of scepticism.

Now think back to being a teenager. Look at how many adolescents think they're immortal. They know in theory there are risks to doing all sorts of things but they somehow convince themselves none of those things will happen to them. Drugs, alcohol, driving fast while under the influence/barely qualified, etc etc.

Then there's the substantial group of teenage girls who self-harm in various ways and whose self-esteem is on the floor. This is an extreme form of self-harm, and undergoing it leads to admiration and praise.

It's all very fucked up.

the down side to these procedures is not fully explained to those seeking these type of surgeries.

I don't buy that. Genital transition surgery is not something anybody rushes into unprepared , like a tattoo or botox. It's no secret this is very complex, timeconsuming , expensive surgery with a long recovery time and obvious potential downsides.

If people choose to have this sort of thing done to themselves then it should be at their own risk and no one else's.

But if vulnerable people have been misled, coerced or poorly advised, then what?

I really hope it's not.

If people choose to have this sort of thing done to themselves then it should be at their own risk and no one else's.

Excellent point. This is far from being 'just' a feminist issue. Mumsnet is a parenting website and a lot of my concern is about what's happening to children. Safeguarding seems to go out of the window as soon as certain words and ideas come up in conversation. So many teachers, youth workers, social workers, psychologists, doctors, other HCPs, politicians and lawyers have swallowed whole the idea that trans rights are an extension or even an integral part of gay rights, but in fact they're not just a separate issue, but in conflict. Lesbians, gay men and bisexual people face discrimination and violence because they are same-sex attracted, not same-gender attracted. Now we have a new variety of homophobes telling them they're bigots who need to work harder at resolving their genital fixations and accept that lesbians can have a penis and gay men can have a vagina.

Whatever happened to critical thinking and common sense? Why have so many people forgotten or not grasped established, uncontroversial facts about child psychology and development, which should have made them realise that teenage girls are very susceptible to social contagion and young children are not knowledgeable or insightful enough to make major life decisions at the age of 6?

Scott Newgent knows about complications. This is Scott’s advice:

“Parent? A declaration of "I'm Trans," really means:

I feel like I don't fit anywhere Mom, help me! Don't butcher my body, help my soul! Teach me how to embrace the AWESOMENESS of being different!'”

-Scott Newgent
SCREAM Louder
Support Scott's Work:

Scott has a donorbox.org site, cannot link it here but search for his name.

This worries me greatly. Children in the care system are already mostly dealing with trauma and disassociation. It doesn't take a lot of imagination to see how that might translate to a disembodied experience.

Luckily the intensity of this interest in gender/trans faded off after a couple of years and there was a gradual slow shift towards a more healthy experimentation with gender expression while no longer denying my female sex.

Thank goodness

This is the thing I can't forgive adults for. There is nothing wrong with women and girls, being, doing, wearing or acting as they wish. The fact that some adults are saying that if girls don't subscribe to a stereotypical version of femininity they must not really be girls is absolutely abhorrent.

Obviously the same goes for boys who like stereotypically feminine things.

Daily I see posts in parental support groups for autistic children where parents are congratulating each other in being so inclusive by accepting that their little girl has really alway been a boy (or vice versa). Anyone who says anything against this is removed from the group for hate. How can we change this environment? Because we know that using preferred pronouns is not benign. We know that for some children this will lead to irreparable harm as soon as they are legally adults (16 in Scotland if Sturgeon gets her way) and for some, their parents will take them abroad whilst applauding themselves for being so 'forward thinking'.

@EthelredtheUnhappy

I've now gone the other way and consider myself a gender critical radfem. What can I say, autistic people love rules and labels, and I was clearly never going to be the feminine woman patriachy wanted me to be.

💪Good on ya!

These are traumatised little humans, with fragile, developing brains, searching for a sense of belonging.

❤

Thank you.

I am an autistic woman. When I was a teenager I seriously thought I was trans. And not that it needs justifying, but I was (and am!) far more "masculine" than many others who have been transitioned.
In the end I never socially transitioned but I almost did start university with a new identity. Thankfully I didn't have any real adults in my life pushing me in this direction (this was all from stuff online). I think if I'd been "brave" enough to socially transition on starting university I would now be detransitioned or dreadfully unhappy.

Luckily the intensity of this interest in gender/trans faded off after a couple of years and there was a gradual slow shift towards a more healthy experimentation with gender expression while no longer denying my female sex.

I've now gone the other way and consider myself a gender critical radfem. What can I say, autistic people love rules and labels, and I was clearly never going to be the feminine woman patriachy wanted me to be.

I would recommend you contact Bayswater Support www.bayswatersupport.org.uk/ for some specific advice.

It is very difficult to know how to approach it. The TRAs have made out adults who are concerned for our children to be bigots which puts wedges between us and them when it comes to supporting and advising them.

It is also very fashionable to be trans.

It's so hard. I hope you get the support you need for your daughter and she doesn't go down on the route of self harm.

There are lots of children's homes in Blackpool. The Council has devised legislation to try to stop them. The kids are bussed in from all over the country. Then each little community of damaged children can become a little petrie dish for all sorts of social contagious. Then there's the problem of social workers who have a sideline in trans activism. It only takes one.

I suppose activist posters think these children were all originally in care because their parents didn't want a trans child. <screams>

Not because of parents with substance misuse issues, or their main carer being in prison, or the presence of a sexually abusive adult or older sibling, or anything like that, oh no.

These are traumatised little humans, with fragile, developing brains, searching for a sense of belonging.

And this

This.

Susie in her own words.

20 years ago, my life took on a wholly unexpected direction. I was sat watching television with my then four-year-old son. And he said he needed to tell me something. And I said, "Fine, yeah, what is it?" And he turned to me and he said, "Mommy, God's made a mistake, and I should've been a girl." I was terrified, but also, it explained so many things, so many things. But a bit like Monopoly, I jumped straight from fear straight into denial and told Jack that it was fine to be a boy and like girly things, but that didn't make him a girl, and he looked at me, and he dropped his eyes, and he didn't say anything else that day anyway. So what I want to do is walk you through the process that has filled the last 24 years of both my life and my child's life and hopefully explain our journey.

Well, Jack was my first child. I thought I knew what to expect, but really I started to notice that as soon as he got mobile and could express himself, he was gravitating towards things that you would see as stereotypically female. But I wasn't bothered. That didn't, you know, that didn't faze me at all. As far as I was concerned, children should be allowed to play with whatever they want, even if it doesn't fit this norm. And at the childminder's when I went back to work, Jack's favorite outfits were the tutu and Snow White costume. And again, that was fine. But not for Dad. So, Jackie's dad struggled, and he blamed me. His thoughts were that because I allowed the Polly Pocket and the My Little Pony, that I was facilitating and encouraging. And I disagreed. And it caused tensions. What I had come to the conclusion with, over the sort of years until she was about two, was that I had a very sensitive, quite effeminate little boy who was probably gay.

But Jack's dad did not approve of our child's effeminate behavior, and it created such tensions that we ended up in couple's counseling. We went to couple's counseling, and what they said to us as parents that we had to agree, no matter what it was that we agreed upon we had to agree. At that point, Tim decided that I must agree with him, apparently, and then all the "girl toys" or "girly toys" as such were taken away and put away, and Jack was made aware that this was not appropriate. And suddenly, a confident, happy little boy became quite quiet, withdrawn, very clingy, and tearful. I didn't like it, and I didn't think it was right. And really for me, the point at which I really put my foot down was about a few weeks later, I think, and my mom phoned me and said, "What's going on with Jack?" and I said "What do you mean?" She said, "Well, I phoned a couple of days ago to ask what Jack wanted for Christmas, and he took the phone out of the room, and he said, 'Can you buy me Barbie Rapunzel? but can you please hide it because if Mommy and Daddy find it, they're going to take it away'" And I realized that I was shaming my child and their toy choices, and the toy embargo stopped. But I went to my GP because I was lost, and I did not know what to do. And she raised her eyebrows, and she said, "Oh, that's interesting." Which wasn't really very helpful, because I was hoping for some direction. And then, she wasn't the first, and she certainly wouldn't be the last person to tell me that it was a phase - it's quite a long one, by now, wouldn't you say? - and that she would grow out of it. But she didn't. And what happened was she kept reiterating, "I'm a girl, I'm a girl, I'm really a girl."

Continues: www.ted.com/talks/susie_green_transgender_a_mother_s_story/transcript

Here's something else I find disturbing. If a child or teen says they hate their genitals and don't want to be the sex they are (body dissociation), what's the first thing you think?

Me, I think: sexual abuse.
Yet these days it gets scooped up as evidence of being trans.

@NeighbourhoodWatchPotholeDivision there was a thread a few days ago, possibly two, on FWR sparked by a Julie Bindel article on the enormous number of children identifying as trans in Blackpool. Perhaps coincidentally, Blackpool also has the largest number of 'looked after' children.

Reading through the thread has made me scared on many levels. As a parent of a 18 year old who is wanting to take T and wanting to consider surgery (top) it’s just something that confuses and worries me deeply. My dc won’t barely speak to me (they are away at uni) because I apparently don’t understand what they are going through and I don’t support them in the way they would like me too. My dc is on the autistic spectrum and emotionally very young, I worry they will start taking T, i am guessing there are places to get hold of it without going down the correct avenues?

I do have trans friends, one that has had full surgery, another who is considering it and several who are taking hormones (f to m) but they are much older than my dd, gone past the stage of wanting/having children so the risk is not so huge. I feel our teenagers are being brainwashed, given all these possible options and confusing them with gender stereotypes. I think it’s even more worry for teens/young people on the spectrum, being someone who’s on the spectrum myself I am sure I would have been very confused being told I could change sex when I was a child/teen.

The thought of young people having surgery that will change their bodies forever and cause other health issues worries me so much. My dc knows my worries but doesn’t seem to want to listen, if I mention my concerns I am just accused of ‘not understanding’.