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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

I don't have a gender because I refuse to believe in gender woo. But I'm not gender non conforming. What am I?

161 replies

Metabigot · 31/12/2022 00:13

Genderfree? I'm not agender or non binary as that implies believing in gender.

In times of old I would have described myself as a Woman, but as non biological women/ transwomen are now women I no longer want to use that word

Trans have spoilt the sex based meaning ot once had.

OP posts:
Chersfrozenface · 31/12/2022 09:46

I have a biological sex and an individual personality. I do not have a gender, that"s a linguistic term and I'm not a noun

So what do I tick when asked "What is your gender?", when the choices don't include "none", as they do for religion?

Helleofabore · 31/12/2022 09:34

Ereshkigalangcleg · 31/12/2022 09:27

Is every on-line forum board to be inclusive to that group you mention is marginalised, and not inclusive to those who wish to discuss the impacts on themselves ?

Because your answering post seems to show to me that you don’t have anything of value to contribute. Just an attempt to shame the OP for their discussion points. Otherwise you would engage with her and discuss it.

I think that's crystal clear. But no, of course no problems with this person's critical thinking.

As an aside eresh the projection alone from that post I referred to was so clear, that I felt I was in upside down land!!!

Hence the very long post to sort out through it all. With great effort to keep it in the guidelines.

Ereshkigalangcleg · 31/12/2022 09:32

And then get on with your own business

Not sure how the OP's personal identity isn't her own business?

Ereshkigalangcleg · 31/12/2022 09:29

Luckily most of us on FWR just ignore these people, despite their manipulative rhetoric and melodramatic appeals to female socialisation.

Holly60 · 31/12/2022 09:27

Metabigot · 31/12/2022 00:50

Unless you enjoy killing the mood that is?

What the mood of utter tedium? I agree with PP it is SO tedious.

You are being totally disingenuous.

Just call yourself a female if you can't deal with anything else.

And then get on with your own business and stop overthinking something which really doesn't require you to.

Ereshkigalangcleg · 31/12/2022 09:27

Is every on-line forum board to be inclusive to that group you mention is marginalised, and not inclusive to those who wish to discuss the impacts on themselves ?

Because your answering post seems to show to me that you don’t have anything of value to contribute. Just an attempt to shame the OP for their discussion points. Otherwise you would engage with her and discuss it.

I think that's crystal clear. But no, of course no problems with this person's critical thinking.

maslinpan · 31/12/2022 09:23

It's a bit on the pricey side, but a good way to clear up any confusion about whether you are a man or a woman or a x or q or a t would be to visit Afghanistan or Iran and see if you have access to an education/job/public spaces. The response should be fairly unambiguous.

nancydroo · 31/12/2022 07:58

In times of old? Nonsense.

somuchtolearnabout · 31/12/2022 07:41

Why are you making it so complicated?

musingsinmidlife · 31/12/2022 07:40

I have always thought of gender as being distinct from sex. I realize there was a period of time when sex was a bad word so gender was used in its place but the words have been used both interchangeably and in different ways for many decades. To me, sex is biological and this is shared globally. Gender is a socio-cultural representation of the beavioural and psychological norms for each sex in distinct contexts. Women and men around the world have had very different traditional representations and expressions and roles of what it means to be a bio man or woman - how that gets represented is not the same in every society or culture. Gender was the word that to me explained those socio-cultural differences.

BIGLYLETTERSMUM · 31/12/2022 07:17

All together now

We

Are

WOMAN

Kucingsparkles · 31/12/2022 06:13

stillvicarinatutu · 31/12/2022 04:16

Some people really have way too much time on their hands .

There are two genders.
Male or female. X or Y .

There are two sexes.

Sex is material reality.

Gender is made-up woo-woo that can be infinitely variable.

Brokendaughter · 31/12/2022 04:28

Nobody has a 'gender' the way the gender cultists get hard ons for it to be used nowadays, that's just made up nonsense.

You have a sex & biology does not care whether you think you are a woman or not.
It doesn't care how you act or think either.

You can fix cars, dress like Tom McDonald & get into punch ups, or dress up like Scarlett O'Hara & sigh on a veranda sipping iced tea.
You are a woman & free to like what you like, dislike what you dislike & feel however you want to feel.

The only thing you can't do is change sex, or have the world treat you as if you have.
Reality doesn't let that happen.

As a woman, you are still likely to suffer the same issues all women do which no man does.

Just be happy & you do you.

ImustLearn2Cook · 31/12/2022 04:28

@Metabigot I get where you are coming from. I never identified as either gender stereotype from a very young age. Why can’t my friend play with dolls because he is a boy? Why can’t I play with my toy trucks in the dirt because I am a girl? Why am I supposed to love the colour pink? Why should a boy be shamed and ridiculed because he loves the colour pink?

As a child I thought so many of the gendered assertions I was hearing were inconsistent with reality and were also quite oppressively limiting for both boys and girls. And why should I be limited by a stereotype?

I am who I am. I, just like everybody else, have my strengths and weaknesses, my personal preferences etc.

So, I still view myself as a woman because of my biology. However, I have always viewed myself as the person I know myself to be.

My identity isn’t tied up in my sex. My identity is everything that makes me, me.

If you like, you could call yourself SPP (sans penis person) 😁

stillvicarinatutu · 31/12/2022 04:16

Some people really have way too much time on their hands .

There are two genders.
Male or female. X or Y .

Helleofabore · 31/12/2022 04:14

And by “you don’t have anything of value to contribute”, I also include “that you might have, but have chosen not to. “

Helleofabore · 31/12/2022 04:08

Ivyonafence · 31/12/2022 02:57

@Helleofabore

I didn't say 'most' marginalised how dishonest of you to misquote me.

My critical thinking skills are just fine. I don't see how anything in my post is dishonest, but I do know that baselessly trying to attack someone's honesty and appeal to emotion are tactics used by people who know they are factually in the wrong. I have no personal agenda when it comes to this issue, just common sense and the mental capacity to know nuance is required when balancing rights between different groups of people.

Oh and I said 'god bless' in a condescending way. Thanks for allowing me to clarify that before I say the same to you.

Now god bless.

Glad you clarified ivyonafence And apologies for seeming to misquote you.

My intention was not quoting you, but placing your post in a category. That category of posts using the emotionally manipulative words such as ‘marginalised’ or ‘vulnerable’ to either shame a poster or to legitimise an ideological belief in that discussion about the conflicts where another groups demands negatively impact established protections of all females.

So who is marginalised again? Since you were so kind in clarifying something in your last post.

I am talking about your second post by the way, your first one was about the topic being ‘tedious’. This is the one:

“But if this garbage goes unchallenged it can be even more difficult for already marginalised people to exist in online spaces.”

How is the discussion around gender and working through where it might an issue that a section of society that is increasingly enforcing gender on to people who don’t believe they have one, preventing some
people from ‘existing’ online?

Or is it that you believe that one group of people should not be able to have discussions on a public forum, on a chat board set aside for these very discussions? That in this free world, is it that a reader who finds this content challenging cannot scroll past or even choose not to engage with the entire board?

Is every on-line forum board to be inclusive to that group you mention is marginalised, and not inclusive to those who wish to discuss the impacts on themselves ?

Because your answering post seems to show to me that you don’t have anything of value to contribute. Just an attempt to shame the OP for their discussion points. Otherwise you would engage with her and discuss it.

Why don’t you do that?

If you don’t see the dishonesty in your post, that is fine. We can. We have seen it all before. Including the projection you used to twist my questions into this recounting;

”I do know that baselessly trying to attack someone's honesty and appeal to emotion are tactics used by people who know they are factually in the wrong.”

I am not the poster who immediately sought to shame the OP for their topic selection - which is entirely an appeal to emotion.

Anyway, to the next part of your post.

Yes! Nuance is needed to balance the rights of different groups.

Discussing the fact that parts of society are perhaps going too far where our children are being taught by well meaning people that ‘everyone’ has a gender identity (because they don’t - very few people have a gender identity), or that some forms now force a choice of selecting a ‘gender’, as two examples, is not about ‘making it difficult’ for some people to exist. That is a hyperbolic and overly emotive attempt to control what this OP wants to discuss.

Do you have a reason to silence women such as the OP from discussing their thoughts on this issue? Because that isn’t that what you are attempting to do?

And if you are not dishonest, you will understand that is how your post is perceived. Regardless of your intentions.

Helleofabore · 31/12/2022 03:48

Metabigot · 31/12/2022 00:13

Genderfree? I'm not agender or non binary as that implies believing in gender.

In times of old I would have described myself as a Woman, but as non biological women/ transwomen are now women I no longer want to use that word

Trans have spoilt the sex based meaning ot once had.

This is an issue for many I think these days OP.

The historical use of ‘gender’ to be a softer alternative to using sex has made this issue very complicated.

I find myself torn towards ‘prefer not to say’ which I historically avoided doing due to negative sexist discrimination anyway, and selecting a gender. Sometimes sex is completely irrelevant to the outcome of the question of it is a brand collecting that data for marketing analysis.

Of course, if it is important, for example setting policy or health services, then I just hope correct protocol is being followed and they have a ‘sex’ question as well.

FlirtsWithRhinos · 31/12/2022 03:16

Apologies, let me rephrase that last sentence so it doesn't read as if I'm challenging gender identity as a whole. It's not the potential existence of gender identity itself I find problematic, it's that the concept doesn't justify the demands that are made in its name.

I would very much like those who believe that gender identity supercedes sex to explain to me how someone like me fits in to their world view, and why trans women should have a greater claim to women's rights and spaces than me

FlirtsWithRhinos · 31/12/2022 02:58

I understand OP. I don't have an inner sense of myself as a "woman" in the way that the male people who identify as trans women and those female people who identify as cis women do.

So while I have hitherto considered myself to be a woman, it is only because that's the name for people with my body, so if that isn't what Woman now means (and how can it, if male people can be women) then it's not a name I feel I can honestly claim.

However, I still suffer all the challenges (and to be fair, the benefits) of those born female, and my need for single sex spaces, opportunities and a political voice has not changed.

I do not believe I should have to lie and claim a gender identity that I do not feel - indeed, do not even understand how it would feel - in order to maintain these rights and support just because the name these things were set up under, and which I have always lived under, has been redefined to suit the purposes of a group to whom I do not belong.

I would very much like those who believe in gender identities to explain to me how someone like me fits in to their world view, and why trans women should have a greater claim to women's rights and spaces than me.

Ivyonafence · 31/12/2022 02:57

@Helleofabore

I didn't say 'most' marginalised how dishonest of you to misquote me.

My critical thinking skills are just fine. I don't see how anything in my post is dishonest, but I do know that baselessly trying to attack someone's honesty and appeal to emotion are tactics used by people who know they are factually in the wrong. I have no personal agenda when it comes to this issue, just common sense and the mental capacity to know nuance is required when balancing rights between different groups of people.

Oh and I said 'god bless' in a condescending way. Thanks for allowing me to clarify that before I say the same to you.

Now god bless.

SammyScrounge · 31/12/2022 02:54

Metabigot · 31/12/2022 00:48

I guess I'm peed off that any old man can call himself woman.

But yes, i shouldn't give in so easily

It's very annoying, I agree. But if you think about it, it's really only transwomen who use that terminology.In the overheated bubble they inhabit, they have invented a language and tried to impose it on us. They can call themselves what they like but no one believes in it or will go along with it.

AlwaysLatte · 31/12/2022 02:43

Genderfree sounds like it fits how you feel, if there's no other term that works for you.

Helleofabore · 31/12/2022 02:27

Ivyonafence · 31/12/2022 00:55

@Metabigot nor you.

But if this garbage goes unchallenged it can be even more difficult for already marginalised people to exist in online spaces.

God bless.

Oh dear! The most marginalised / most vulnerable did not take long to appear did it?

Please stop believing those mantra like phrases that show either you have not engaged your own critical thinking skills, or that you are very heavily invested in this ideological thinking for your own reasons.

What you are not, is honest.

And if you are using ‘god bless’ appropriately, how do you square that dishonesty with your faith?

And if you have just used ‘god bless’ without being a person of faith… well… that just reinforces that dishonesty, doesn’t it?

Ballymaloo · 31/12/2022 02:25

But I'm not gender non conforming
You can’t be gender conforming. Or gender non conforming. Because you don’t believe that gender exists. So there’s nothing to conform to?

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