Women's rights general conversations

There was an article in the Guardian a couple of months ago about how women and girls are being injured by anal sex, we're just not 'designed' for it. It prompted a thread on here. I'm sure there was probably at least one 'cool girl' who wouldn't have seen a problem with it. I'll try and find the original article, please pray for my search history.

Pretty sure My Nigel doesn't.

What can be done about it though? I don’t know any men who don’t watch it. Just another thing on the long list of things that put me off being in a relationship. It’s not even just porn now, it’s webcams and OnlyFans and god knows what else. No thanks.

Isn't the acceptance of this all part of the influence of porn on their sex lives? It's been known for years that sometimes hanging yourself ( if a man) will give you an erection. I can't think the same goes for women. Anal sex wasn't even a thing when I was young, and if someone tried to strangle me, I'd knee them in the balls and leave them. Trouble is peer pressure is a thing.

Also, has anyone listened to Please Protect Abraham on BBC sounds? Remember that young woman who was gang raped for hours in 2007? The young boy who escorted her out of there, and gave witness was later murdered. I am sure violent porn sewed the seeds in the minds of the gang rapists.

Ironically though, one of the few which Still Allows Feminist Comments (albeit among the usual Stupid As Fuck Comments).

Heh!

Shit And For Coroners

I don’t like the word either, in any context

Yeah, it's often used affectionately on MN.

maybe substitute another word, I dunno, cockwombles maybe?

I don't like the word "cunt" being used as an insult. This is I prefer the word be used:

www.goodreads.com/quotes/9147193-i-got-the-idea-of-loving-from-a-manservant-in

Ah right.

There's also WTTTH (worse than ten thousand hitlers) but I haven't seen that one used for a while.

Shit and for cunts

Can't work out what SAFC stands for?

Yes, very good and well-argued piece. I take no pleasure in slagging off the Graun, but increasingly it just doesn't do what it says on the tin; treat its readers with respect. If the Guardian is supposed to be for 'clever' people, OK, let's have a bit (a lot!) more solid logic in the arguments, rather than hand-wavey bollocks about gender and respect. The Mail is still SAFC, though, however correct they be on certain topics.

Brilliant piece by Stock. Thanks for posting.

Yes, that felt so familiar.

Excoriating from Stock - and although the context is different this is the level of misplaced superiority that we have left behind at the old place:

Moral sophisticates as they are bound to try to be, it seems likely that many of those pushing for an “inclusive” editorial line on trans issues, to the exclusion of other viewpoints, would admit in private that they at least understood gender-critical reservations. Yet it appears that they won’t allow untrammelled voice to be given to those reservations because they fear that if they did, stupid people might be influenced to do bad things because of it.

Prof Stock follows up on Hadley Freeman about the Grauniad, starting as she means to go on:

When you look at the state of some ostensibly progressive media organisations these days, it’s hard to understand how their more talented employees find the energy to get up in the morning. Imagine starting your career inspired by visions of Woodward and Bernstein and Pulitzer Prizes, and ending up having to capitulate to a rapist’s preferred pronouns.

unherd.com/2022/12/is-the-guardian-sowing-disinformation/

Two stories caught my eye this morning. One for the amusement value of terrible arguments:

Transphobes Are Becoming Armchair Archaeologists To Justify Their Bigotry

www.themarysue.com/the-anti-trans-rhetoric-about-theoretical-archaeologists-is-still-wrong/

and the UK government may challenge Scottish GRA reform (good!)

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-63909309

The latter has its own thread already

www.mumsnet.com/talk/womens_rights/4694086-bbc-uk-govt-may-not-recognise-a-proposed-new-system-in-scotland-to-allow-people-to-legally-change-their-gender-and-hasnt-ruled-out-a-legal-challenge

Thank you for that, @funnelfanjo . Definitely not physical dependence then.

What I love about where I am now is what a friend and I used to call the golden moment. It's when I've had a couple of drinks and there's this feeling of happy content, everything feels more gentle. It's knowing you're not sober but neither are you drunk. Your emotions are imbued with a golden halo. Back in the bad old days we'd get there and think we needed to keep drinking to stay there. No matter how many times that didn't work - every time - we kept doing it. Now, when I get there, once in a blue moon because although I can go to three drinks I mostly just have a small beer over dinner with a friend, I just enjoy it, stop drinking and live in the moment for as long as it lasts. The clue was always in the name we gave it, golden moment. Moments are just that, a brief period. Trying to make it last longer destroys it.

@CyanCyan , I started having blackouts too and that was scary. It's amazing that we can go through that for a while before thinking that maybe it might be time to do something about it. I'm glad you're in a better place too although I wish it was lacking migraines, they are bloody horrible.

From a medical perspective, alcohol/drug dependent generally means physically dependent, ie you have withdrawal symptoms if you try and stop drinking. For alcohol thats shaking, nausea, sickness, sweating, ie delirium tremens. If you get to that stage, then you are in need of medical help because the DTs can be fatal. Just stopping is very difficult and very dangerous. People in this situation physically need to drink every day, even when they don't want to.

Psychological dependency (aka addiction) is generally the description of the psychological drivers of problem drinkers, such as self-medication, binge drinking, social pressures etc etc.

You can be addicted but not dependent, and you can be dependent but not addicted. You can be both addicted and dependent. All of these can fall under the umbrella of "alcoholism".

Anyone who has truly overcome problem drinking has my admiration - it's one of the hardest drugs to quit, not least because of societal attitudes to drink in the UK.