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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

School Curriculum - A personal win

83 replies

InterestingUsernameTBC · 25/11/2022 09:22

18 months ago I first asked for a copy of the resources my child's new secondary school would be using for teaching gender identity in PSHE. I asked one main question - What are you doing to protect the children in your care from becoming part of the growing numbers of detransitioners harmed by gender identity affirmation?

After numerous emails, a couple of phone calls and several in-person meetings I have now had confirmation of the new PSHE curriculum.

Resources are drawn heavily from Transgender Trend. It is made clear that not everyone believes in, or considers they have, a gender identity. Cis and queer will be taught as controversial terms which should not be applied to others. Gender will be taught as social and cultural expectations placed on individuals because of their sex. Gender identity will not be casually slipped into other subjects as impartiality on the subject will be impressed on all subject teachers.

And what I'm most pleased with - No child will be able to self-declare a trans identity. Any child questioning their 'gender' will be referred to safeguarding for appropriate clinical referrals to be made.

A big thank you to the posters on this board for providing information and links and giving me the confidence to challenge this and showing how important it is.

And a reminder that we can all make a difference by speaking out. I have been a lone voice on this matter with the school and it has taken ages but I have had a huge influence that will have impacted not just the 1500 pupils attending the school now but future intakes too, and all the staff who will now feel empowered to speak up, whether they are full-on gender critical or just a little concerned about things.

OP posts:
Whatsnewpussyhat · 25/11/2022 13:35

You are amazing!
What a fantastic result.

DameMaud · 25/11/2022 13:32

Truthlikeness · 25/11/2022 13:28

This is fabulous news. I challenged this ideology recently in a different context (using a lot of what seemed to me concrete and impartial evidence) and it went disastrously badly, but I'm settling in for the long game. :-)

Yes, I think it can make a difference how already ingrained the relevent people are in the ideology. Many people are just unaware/uninformed though and those are the ones to reach where we can. Even if many, or key people, in an organisation are captured, there may be others who are unsure or curious who are listening, so keep going- if you can, I say!

Truthlikeness · 25/11/2022 13:28

This is fabulous news. I challenged this ideology recently in a different context (using a lot of what seemed to me concrete and impartial evidence) and it went disastrously badly, but I'm settling in for the long game. :-)

senua · 25/11/2022 13:22

That update is heartening. I had visions of the Headteacher agreeing then the Head of Dept sabotaging it all. They can be in the too open-minded camp.

2plus2equals5 · 25/11/2022 13:21

Brilliant OP. Well done! You have made a huge difference to how many children? To keeping them safer. That's a huge achievement.

You did it without the Ofsted head's recent comments about safeguarding but anyone doing the same now will be able to use that too. Schools are exceptionally interested in what Ofsted have to say in my experience.

DameMaud · 25/11/2022 13:20

InterestingUsernameTBC · 25/11/2022 13:09

Thanks for all the congratulations everyone on this thread.

And thanks for the questions DameMaud.

The thing that made the most difference was finally getting to speak with the head of the PSHE curriculum. Before that it was the deputy head who was a bit a stumped when I challenged his assertion that he was male and identified as a man. I asked if he did indeed identify as a man or if he just understood that a male person is a man. And the other representative was the mental health lead who was very concerned about the 40% suicide stat peddled by Stonewall and was quite happy to talk to young people about transition being an option.

The PSHE lead was very interested in what I had to say, noted down all the resources I referred to and from subsequent conversations actually seems to have followed them up.

Things that I relied on were:

The Forstater judgement to show that non-belief in gender identity is protected. I shared my non-belief and I pointed out that they need to protect pupils who don't believe too. (Alison Bailey judgement wasn't out at this point)

Stephanie Davies-Arai being awarded British Empire Medal for services for children. Made it super easy to recommend Transgender Trend for resources.

Detrans Voices for stories from detransitioners.

Pointing out the safeguarding issue with children being encouraged to use opposite sex pronouns and the impact that has on parents/carers when risk assessing activities with friends like sleepovers or hanging out at the park. I could see this register with the deputy head, like a light switched on.

The new NHS guidelines were not available when I spoke with the school but the PSHE lead had looked that up independently. That's where his decision to not transition anyone in school came from.

And I updated him on the Mermaids scandal to warn off signposting there.

There's loads of good stuff to refer to now.

Brilliant stuff. Yes. And even more available now, as you say. So good to speak to each lead individually and what relates to their particular area. Also, highlighting childrens' rights to hold GC belief is so important!
Thanks for this Interesting!

Unformidable · 25/11/2022 13:13

👏Well done!

InterestingUsernameTBC · 25/11/2022 13:11

And I actually did talk about AGP. Education guidelines say school have to teach the facts about gender identity. I asked what were the facts and pointed out that one fact is that AGP is a motivation for some male transitioners. Cue furious scribbles from PSHE lead to Google later. Wonder how he found that....

OP posts:
InterestingUsernameTBC · 25/11/2022 13:09

Thanks for all the congratulations everyone on this thread.

And thanks for the questions DameMaud.

The thing that made the most difference was finally getting to speak with the head of the PSHE curriculum. Before that it was the deputy head who was a bit a stumped when I challenged his assertion that he was male and identified as a man. I asked if he did indeed identify as a man or if he just understood that a male person is a man. And the other representative was the mental health lead who was very concerned about the 40% suicide stat peddled by Stonewall and was quite happy to talk to young people about transition being an option.

The PSHE lead was very interested in what I had to say, noted down all the resources I referred to and from subsequent conversations actually seems to have followed them up.

Things that I relied on were:

The Forstater judgement to show that non-belief in gender identity is protected. I shared my non-belief and I pointed out that they need to protect pupils who don't believe too. (Alison Bailey judgement wasn't out at this point)

Stephanie Davies-Arai being awarded British Empire Medal for services for children. Made it super easy to recommend Transgender Trend for resources.

Detrans Voices for stories from detransitioners.

Pointing out the safeguarding issue with children being encouraged to use opposite sex pronouns and the impact that has on parents/carers when risk assessing activities with friends like sleepovers or hanging out at the park. I could see this register with the deputy head, like a light switched on.

The new NHS guidelines were not available when I spoke with the school but the PSHE lead had looked that up independently. That's where his decision to not transition anyone in school came from.

And I updated him on the Mermaids scandal to warn off signposting there.

There's loads of good stuff to refer to now.

OP posts:
DameMaud · 25/11/2022 11:31

(I think your opening question on detransitioners was a stroke of genius btw)

DameMaud · 25/11/2022 11:30

Can you say why you think was the most effective evidence/resources you gave please @InterestingUsernameTBC ?
Were there any particular ones that seemed to be taken most seriously by the school? ( Although I'm sure it was cumulative from your months of dogged effort of emails, meetings etc). Just wondering if there was one or two pieces that felt like they provided a turn around, or that you recommend people inspired her can start with?

sashagabadon · 25/11/2022 11:29

Wow, well done. Your framing of your first question is a great way of challenging the ideology.

senua · 25/11/2022 11:26

Well done! Congratulations!!
Don't forget to follow up to make sure that promises are fulfilled and that there is no backsliding.

waterwitch · 25/11/2022 11:10

You are a hero! There will families in your area who do not need to go through the trauma of finding their teen has self-identified without the knowledge of their parents. Teenagers who now do not undergo unnecessary, invasive hormone treatment and surgery because of your work. Maybe babies born and families made because individuals were not sterilised in their late teens/early twenties.
💐💐💐

JoodyBlue · 25/11/2022 10:57

That is absolutely fantastic. Well done for your perseverence and courage. Amazing! Flowers

VestofAbsurdity · 25/11/2022 10:31

Congratulations @InterestingUsernameTBC I can imagine doing it was very lonely, frustrating and hard work but it has paid off due to your tenacity. Thank you.

Useruser1 · 25/11/2022 10:30

Brilliant. I hope to be able to say similar in a few months!

ArabellaScott · 25/11/2022 10:28

OP that's absolutely wonderful. A huge well done.

Tryfull · 25/11/2022 10:28

Well done. Just shows what a difference one person can make. Who knows how many children you may have saved from surgical mutilation and lifelong medication and side effects? 👏👏👏

SallyLockheart · 25/11/2022 10:24

Lovely news👏👏

horseymum · 25/11/2022 10:00

That's a great question to ask, I might steal it. I have been wanting to write to the school for ages but couldn't settle on what to ask specifically so I get a reply. Well done!

Leafstamp · 25/11/2022 09:54

Fantastic. Parents really need to keep banging on about this.

Oblahdeeoblahdoe · 25/11/2022 09:51

Superb result. Let's hope the school shares their policy and curriculum with others

ZandathePanda · 25/11/2022 09:47

What a breath of fresh air! Well done

DameMaud · 25/11/2022 09:41

What an incredible achievement Interesting! And to have done that all on your own. Tenacity, knowledge, and courage can pay off. 💪🥂