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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

How to avoid / decline stating pronouns or gender in meetings, forms, signatures etc:

34 replies

JFDIYOLO · 20/11/2022 09:50

'I don't do that, in support of those who have not yet made their decision - requiring a public statement could force those who haven't decided yet, to either prematurely out themselves, or lie about themselves for protection.'

'No thank you, it would be like being required to add 'I believe in God the father, God the son, etc' on my emails. I don't share that belief system either, and belief is of course a protected characteristic.'

When faced with a form asking your 'gender', go for Other - and if there is a freestyle box, add in 'I do not have a gender. My sex is ...'

'I don't agree with imposing compelled speech. I abstain.'

'No.'

What would you do?

OP posts:
MarmaladeFatkins · 20/11/2022 11:53

I think I am just going to say 'no thank you' if directly asked at work, in a meeting

BlueWalnut · 20/11/2022 11:51

Pinniepotter · 20/11/2022 09:55

I go for either - "I don't mind how I'm referred to" and "I think the latest advice is not to insist on pronouns as it's uncomfortable for any one in the process of transitioning".

No one really argues with this.

I never tick a gender box and always opt for sex

This, because I genuinely believe it’s true. It can feel like deeply personal information and it isn’t reasonable to expect everyone to disclose it.

taliaG · 20/11/2022 11:49

I don't feel comfortable sharing that.

That's not relevant to my work and I don't wish to share it.

I don't want to highlight my sex on my emails as I feel it puts me at risk of discrimination

I prefer not to say

PatChauncey · 20/11/2022 11:46

I've just been asked on a form for a new hairdresser 🤦I just wrote that my pronouns were sex-based.

Imicola · 20/11/2022 11:41

I'd either ignore, or just say they are sex based (and in my head I'd add - like my oppression)

Empowermenomore · 20/11/2022 10:36

When this was presented at work by a young colleague that oddly admired the work done by Carolina Criado Perez, she appeal to how kind it was for those who don’t dare to say their gender. So it wasn’t so much, how do you want to be referred, but how can you enable others to be comfortable stating their pronouns that presumably will be at odds.

I had difficulties relating to her stance. Specially in a scientific setting.

I’ll ignore or say it’s private and protected information.

Signalbox · 20/11/2022 10:00

Definitely not the first one as it implies you agree with the ideology.

Personally I’d keep it simple because I have a tendency to trip over my words. In the first instance I would just see if I can get away with ignoring the request completely. If challenged I would just say “I’m not bothered how people refer to me”.

Pinniepotter · 20/11/2022 09:55

I go for either - "I don't mind how I'm referred to" and "I think the latest advice is not to insist on pronouns as it's uncomfortable for any one in the process of transitioning".

No one really argues with this.

I never tick a gender box and always opt for sex

ArabellaScott · 20/11/2022 09:54

Ignore. So far, that's worked fine.