Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Feminism: chat

Original poster

What have people done when asked pronouns? (but are not trans ideologists)

185 replies

newbookonshelf · 13/11/2022 14:22

I've never been asked my pronouns but I wonder what I would say if I was. I WFH so never come up. I think I may say 'none' , 'you pick' , or maybe 'the' or simply 'what do you mean?'

So I'm just wondering how people do respond to this if they are not gender/trans ideologists. I'm looking for examples and what happened when you said it.

OP posts:
Babdoc · 13/11/2022 15:55

AlwaysLatte, you either are a female, or you are a man who “identifies” as female, but you can’t be both - they are mutually exclusive!

midgetastic · 13/11/2022 15:54

But to address your point about everyone being comfortable

I am not at all comfortable

I am female and very clearly so

Beyond biology I don't see how I am more like other women than men

If I had any choice I'd prefer people to think of me as a man because it's always seemed the better option - respect , free from discrimination, what's not to like ?

I never corrected anyone who has mistaken me for male before they meet me

But if I say he/him I would not be treated like other men because I am so clearly female that my preference would not get any respect

Schlaar · 13/11/2022 15:53

I offer male pronouns and watch people stumbling over themselves trying to refer to me correctly.

midgetastic · 13/11/2022 15:50

You shouldn't be using pronouns to address anyone

AlwaysLatte · 13/11/2022 15:48

I'm born female and identify as female but I'm happy with being asked as I feel then that everyone gets to be addressed the way that they prefer.

SudocremOnEverything · 13/11/2022 15:46

I had to pick pronouns for a job application recently. I went with ‘other’ and said I found being asked very intrusive.

SignOnTheWindow · 13/11/2022 15:46

"Oh, ok, you can just use the ones appropriate to my sex"

NuffSaidSam · 13/11/2022 15:44

SloppySlippers · 13/11/2022 15:41

Been in a few situations where people have started meetings with "we'll go round and everyone give their name and pronouns". I've just given my name. Never been pressed on it. If I was, I was planning to say "no thanks. I don't do that" or similar

Same for me.

SloppySlippers · 13/11/2022 15:41

Been in a few situations where people have started meetings with "we'll go round and everyone give their name and pronouns". I've just given my name. Never been pressed on it. If I was, I was planning to say "no thanks. I don't do that" or similar

TheirEminence · 13/11/2022 14:29

Just say 'I do not state my pronouns.' Or 'Why do you want to know?' if it's a one-to-one situation. Or ignore the question (might be best approach for a so-called pronoun round).

I've been in 'pronoun-round' type situations, ignored the prompt and nothing happened.