I'm not a woman - which facilities should I use

“Those who bully and obfuscate, and scream about being allowed in everywhere, ARE the ones making life miserable for women.”

I am put in mind of an expression we used to get at school all the time “well, just so you know, a few have just spoilt it for everyone”.

Contrary to the pp who said I must have awful men in my life, and not know any trans people, I know plenty of decent men, and yes, I know trans people too. The youngest trans woman I know is my son’s closest friend, who only came out last year. The oldest has been living as a trans woman for 40 years. But this isn’t that.

Those who bully and obfuscate, and scream about being allowed in everywhere, are not the ones making life miserable for women.

Men who go about their normal day not assaulting women, are not the ones making life difficult for women (except perhaps in their complicity in not speaking up).

It’s the outraged minority of trans, who say they speak for everyone in their group, who make life dangerous and miserable for women, not to mention trans people who are vilified as a group because of their actions.

It is the violent minority of men who make life dangerous and miserable for women.

It is UNNERVING how often those two distinct groups intersect.

To say that all men are rapists is clearly nonsense. To say that all trans women are intending to assault women, is clearly nonsense. But whilst both clearly happen, there is NO way that women should have to open up their spaces to anyone who wants to claim they “identify” as a woman.

Until there is legislation for a 4th kind of space, there is no reason women should just have to hand over the keys, together with their safety, and privacy.

I understand what you are saying, however I believe that we should have clear and definite guidelines. I think that females and males have the right to use facilities where the other sex is not present - when you use those facilities that is what you expect. Once we blur these lines then really we have lost this for good. I feel the whole issue has been pushed so much and that it is now difficult to make any comment which is worrying as people do have different views and opinions.

Well yes ….

Given that women are very low for harming men!

Men commit the VAST majority of all assaults

Always men who say they are women that are the problem.

When you use street toilets....I mean the units you put coins in and a door opens... they are for people. No gender specified. Just a toilet. Small offices just have a toilet cubicle for everyone to use. I have no idea why toilets need to be gendered.

Well James can use the mens as they pose no threat to men.

but also welcome to use the women’s

its TW in the ladies that’s the issue.

I disagree. I know a few trans people and they just get on with their lives living the gender they identify as. It makes me really sad to think that my friend James should use the female toilets. You would never know he was born female, and would raise more eyebrows using the women's loos than the men's.

In my view people should use the toilet facilities that they were born to use, I do not think we should have gender neutral toilets nor a third option.

Why in all that is holy is this ad coming up on my screen on this thread?

I need to Brillo pad my eyes now.

It’s damaging to young people who are encouraged to undertake medical procedures which often have irreversible consequences.

it’s damaging to women when images such as these which popped up on Facebook are used to indicate what a trans woman thinks it means to be a woman.

Yep. Honestly, I can't wait for this batshit trend to die a death. It's an absolute waste of brain cells at best, and damaging to young people who are all happily jumping on the bandwagon.

while you're here:

what does it mean not to have a gender identity?

you are a female by sex, you have female hormones and a female body. Your experience of the world is channeled through your female biological make up.

What does gender identity mean to you if sex is not sufficent for you to think of yourself as a woman?

when my grandma told me I was more like the boy and my brother more like the girl she was referring to stereotypical gender roles.

I didn't think of myself as less female as a result. Just a female who didn't fit I think gender stereotypes.

I know it is so ridiculous. If taken literally any woman who doesn't identify as a woman wouldn't apply! I don't identify as a woman I am a woman. Also female technicians who have taken maternity or career breaks for caring do not have the same privilege as men who now identify as women and have never taken that kind of leave. Woke madness and poor language from Herschel.

Just use the facilities based on your sex. It’s not difficult.

Toilets are segregated by sex. Biology will tell you which one to use.
There is no reason to think we can’t achieve a third option in time.

Would you feel comfortable with a third ‘non-binary’ option for all trans?

Simplify

You have lost me - how is anyone supposed to understand this ad therefore support you? I am a well educated professional and re read your post three times and still have no idea what you are.

May I simply:

If you have a vagina - use the ladies
If you have a penis you use the mens
If you have had all of your genitalia removed you may feel more comfortable in a private disabled bathroom

It doesn’t matter how you identify given this is about safety and sex.

TBH I think nobody gives a stuff OP, just go to the womans toilet.