I'm not a woman - which facilities should I use

I find it odd that you are secure enough to denounce your gender, which is entirely your choice so and I'm glad you are being true to yourself but....then you are seeking approval for which toilet to use?

Just use a toilet!

I identify as a carrot!

If you sit go in the ladies toilets. If you stand then it’s the gents. Everything else is irrelevant.

If being momentarily misgendered in other people's heads is the worst thing that ever happens to you, you have it good.

I think it may be worth speaking to someone about this anxiety you're experiencing (and no I don't mean conversion therapy) It's not healthy being this worried about using public toilets. You don't see yourself as a man so are uncomfortable using the men's but you also don't see yourself as a women so can't use the women's either. I just want a toilet that I am safe in and can relieve myself. I don't understand all the overthinking you are doing.

also genuine question.. why do you feel uncomfortable when you go to ladies loos? Surely, toilet is just place where we can “do our business” in private. Having female counterparts means it’s much easier to wee in a toilet rather than urinal. Plus, female loos have lockable cubicles so it doesn’t really matter who uses them. I think you try to create a problem when none is there.

"However I'd feel mis gendered if anyone assumed that because I go to the ladies I identify as a woman. "

Yawn

Ffs use the female toilets. If there was ever an example of a first world problem, this is it.

If you are biologically male, whether you look "scary" or not, whether you take female hormones or not, whether you have had genital surgery or not, whether you are "beautiful" or not - you need to use the male toilet.

You are male.

However I'd feel mis gendered if anyone assumed that because I go to the ladies I identify as a woman.

The only thing I'd assume if I saw you in the women's loos is that you need to use those facilities for some reason. I would not assume that you are female, I'd recognise you as female. I would make no assumptions about your sense of self because it is irrelevant and none of my business.

I suppose that if you came in decked with symbols of some ideology or faith I might assume that you were an adherent of that ideology or faith, but it would still be irrelevant to me. A female who needs to use the toilets should use the women's loos.

You worry too much about what others might think about you. What they think is their problem, not yours.

Sorry OP, you tried to make a valid point but perhaps you should have waited until a few more people had had their morning coffee and could read between the lines!!

Non binary is, indeed, tedious self regarding bullshit

Don't give a shit how dirty or messy women's Lois can be as long as dick owner or former dick owners stay out.

Non-binary is bullshit.
Its mainly spicy straights that opt into others oppression while thinking it makes them special and not-boring-"cishetronormative"( for even writing that). So what if you have rejected female stereotypes, every other women on here has, we don't need to make up a personality because of it. If its makes you happy crack-on but in the real world no-one cares, but do not make demands on us because of your fantasy.
You're female, you know you are, we know you are. Nobody gives a shit where you shit.

Just forget ‘gender ideology’, who cares what Stonewall says.

Use the womens toilets.

Don’t overthink/wind everyone up.

Tbh every time I’ve been to female public toilets there’s always wee on the seat, a few cubicles where the toilet is full of shit, and they are horrible !!!

These posts give me rage. None of us identified into our oppression. Why not acknowledge that our gender oppression is unfair and wrong instead of claiming special status?

We're all non-binary when it comes to gender because the gender binary is utter made up bollox. So use the ladies as is appropriate with your biology.

I meant to add, male privilege by birth means that the female to male issues are very different to the male to female issues. In turn the female to neutral are very different to male to neutral. Don't let anyone gaslight you into accepting otherwise and don't let a label define you.

All toilets should be like this in my opinion, I hate the communal loos with inadequate cubicles. We should all be entitled to privacy.

@ancientgran of course!!! 🤦🏻‍♀️ but there is no space!!!! Space is money!!! Toilets would have to take 3 times more floor space!!! EVERYWHERE! Not going to happen

If you are a biological male and are scared in the men's loo, that is a men's problem. Women aren't human shields.

You are a women so you use the women's toilets.

We don't get to identify out of biology. It's just the way it is.

Women can do whatever they like, wear whatever they like, date whatever consenting adult they like. Our sex only defines us if we allow regressive stereotypes to let that happen.

How about this?

"Male toilets" are for SCARY people. And "female toilets" are for SCARED people 😉

If you are biologically female but now look scary then you go into the male toilet. If you don't look scary yet but are scared, female toilet it is.
If you are biologically male and still look scary to women, you need to use the male toilet

This just sounds like the result of overthinking. You are female. You use the toilets for females. That's it. I'm also not sure that you'll find answers from 'genderists' here if that's what you were looking for.

I find all of this navel gazing pretty annoying and offensive. It's the modern day version of "I'm not like other women". It assumes that most women have a female or feminine gender identity and that you are different if you don't. It smacks of thinking that you're not like all of those other boring, 2D women who identify with the stereotypes applied to them. How offensive is that? It's the same misogynistic bullshit I've heard my entire life wrapped up in a lovely, progressive rainbow.

I also don't understand your comment about agenderism being a refusal to allow your sexed body define you, and then asking a poster what is feels like to identify as a woman. Do you think that all women who don't define themselves as agender or male must therefore identify as women? And that we allow our sexed bodies to define us? I'm really surprised that anybody would jump to those conclusions. It comes across as being totally wrapped up in yourself and having no understanding of other people at all. I don't even believe in the messed up concept of gender, so I don't define myself that way. I have a biological sex and then my personality is a complex mix of things, just like everybody else. By your reckoning, I would be agender. But I just see myself as an average woman, the same as most others.

I can't help but think that your opinions actually mirror those held by the majority of people. Most of the women in the female toilets are not milling around outside, wondering whether their gender identity matches the toilets they are going to use and what message it will send to other people. They know that they are women and use the corresponding toilets. Their likes/dislikes/personality traits (or whatever other traits are used to determine your gender) don't come into it. I don't understand why you think you are so unusual and need to consider this.

So……if you don’t want to identify as a male and you were born a female, why wouldn’t you just use the woman’s ? Or are you just feeling pedantic ?

The good guys keep out so the bad guys stand out.