I'm not a woman - which facilities should I use

According to Stonewall definition. A couple of the founders of Stonewall have disowned the organisation because of their extreme nonsense

No one else using the loos is remotely interested in your gender, they are just using the lav, washing their hands and leaving. Are you busily assuming people's gender when out and about in a manner that affects them?

This x 2

Spot on 👍

Not at all. Im not confortable with the mens because I don't identify as a man. I am non binary also according to stonewall definition. I've borne two children so am legitimately biologically female. However I'd feel mis gendered if anyone assumed that because I go to the ladies I identify as a woman. I am not messing here. I genuinely now feel uncomfortable wherever I go.

Really, what in earth does NB really mean, do you not think the whole thing is ridiculous really, do you honesty really think that NB is a real thing? Sorrry I hope that's not hurtful, but you are clearly a women, gender non conforming maybe, but still a women...

I am with you @Whatiswrongwithmyknee ... I cannot identify out of my oppression and I sure as hell do not want anyone assuming that I identify into it. I do not want to be defined by my sexed body but I recognise that others define my by it and assign expectations and roles to it, and J reject those assumptions, expectations and assigned roles.

There is evidence going back to Sparta and Athens linking population balance that favour males with the lower status of females.. we have to be able to count males and females in all parts of our lives so we can strive towards raising the status of females in all areas.

Sounds like you are not comfortable using public toilets at all unless they are mixed use.

Go to the loo before you go out.

Very good point @Notesfromtheunderground . I think if there are third spaces then they should perhaps be of the same traditional public toilet design as well - hand-basin area and the 7/8ths cubical doors.

As to your question OP - as others have said biological women should use ladies' loos.

Genuine question: what is the harm caused to you by a thought in an unknown woman's head?

I wonder if the OP manages to feel more of a woman when she is bleeding from her vagina and needs to change her sanitary protection so goes into a woman’s toilet , or does she worry that people will still mis gender her and simply assume she is a woman even when her body is expressing her womanhood is a very visceral manner? What a mind fuck.

In the nicest possible way, why would i give a toss how you 'identify' if you are a stranger in a public toilet?

I'm not interested in your religious views, your star sign, how you vote, your blood group, whether you watch Netflix, or anything other than whether you are in the correct single sex facilities or not.

Nonsense, it's always obvious.

take PanPacificBallroomChampion's advice

Gender ideology is not logical so I am not sure if you are actually expecting a reasonable answer op! In any case, as you have shown, everyone has a sex, not everyone has a gender identity (I don’t either). I use the women’s facilities because I am a woman i.e. I am female and I believe (as do most people) that a woman is female.

@lborgia I feel for you if you don't have men in your life that are interested in female perspectives. And that you don't seem to have trans people in your life either in order to better understand. I could use any of the trans people who are my friends or family to discuss this as all are unique and different.

I think based on a lot of the replies you’re better off making sure you go to the loo before you leave the house, don’t drink anything and keep trips short then you should be ok until you get back home. Whatever you do will upset someone it seems.

But why on earth would you think that most women align themselves with sexist stereotypes....?? That's incredibly offensive to a lot of women.

I am a woman, a female, born in a female body (cis gender if you prefer that term). I don't wear makeup. Never played with dollies. Love power tools. Play football. Not interested in clothes.

None of which makes me less of a woman.

Suggesting that all women are of a certain mould or description is part of what's created this mess in the first place and is frankly patriarchal of you.

Fight for a third space or use the toilets for females as you're biologically female.

You claim to have kids, op. If you have daughters, are you happy with them going in on their own to a space where there might be a man with his cock out. Regardless of his spinny skirt or glitter nail polish

@ReeseWitherfork

why?

if someone (not saying the OP does) looks like a man, why shouldn't they use the mens toilets instead of making women & especially children, uncomfortable in what USED to be a safe space?

@Whatiswrongwithmyknee

However I'd feel mis gendered if anyone assumed that because I go to the ladies I identify as a woman. I am not messing here. I genuinely now feel uncomfortable wherever I go

Seriously? FGS. You'd feel 'misgendered'
no one using the toilets spends that long giving a flying fuck what you choose to be, go into the mens if you're going to scare small children in the ladies. Go in the ladies if men are going to scare you. Just go to the bloody toilet & stop naval gazing.

Genuine Question:
you are female, you were born female, why can't you just be female & dress & do as you please, like the rest of us? Without all the angst. I don't wear dresses, I don't wear makeup, I don't do much at all
'typically female' I just get on with my life, being me. Why is that so hard to do

I assumed the OP was taking the piss, to highlight the pile of old bollocks that is gender ideology.

I think females should use women's loo's and males should use men's.

I have absolutely no problem with transmen or non binary females using women's facilities.

How do gender ideologists suggest I negotiate this?

I'm not a gender ideologist - and my understanding of those who are are that they follow queer theory and Stonewall.

I'm just a boring biological woman who learned her feminism in the second wave.

I suggest you use the women's, or, if there is something wrong with your knee, possibly the disabled.

Afterall, all you want to do is have a wee, surely, and this should not be about D&M feelings about identity. Get in, wee, wash hands and come out. Job done.

What do you mean you don't want "people to feel justified in assuming that I align myself with sexist stereotypes just because of the facilities I use"?

I'm not being facetious, but do you genuinely think that if you use the women's loos that people assume you enjoy baking/have children/get your nails done/scream when you see a spider?

What on earth are these sexist stereotypes you're talking about? And why are you reinforcing these stereotypes by claiming that loos for people of your sex are only for those who buy in them?

I do not ever want people to feel justified in assuming that I align myself with sexist stereotypes just because of the facilities I use.

Gosh yes, I am mortified that people assume I like glittery pink nail varnish and can't change a car tyre every time I use the women's toilets.

I mean, obviously everyone is looking at ME and thinking about ME and my fabulous and superior gender identity, instead of just going for a pee.

🙄🙄🙄