I am embracing virtue signalling pronouns in emails

It's shouldn't really be a hard concept for the true believers to have to explain. Why would Paul need a heads up to be able to do so? If he can't explain his pronoun use on the spot then why is he making the point of including them?

I find pronouns on emails offensive and triggering. That's some kind of shibboleth now right, someone has to Do Something so I'm not offended and triggered any more? I need a Safe Space!!

While we may not agree with pronouns, someone adding them is only following the (wrongly perhaps) generally accepted best practice for inclusivity.

Who decided that this was 'best practice for inclusivity?

I see pronouns and feel that the person adding them has signalled that they follow a belief system that I don't.

Why would Paul need time to prepare a reason for his email choices?

singling someone out in a group setting is bullying plain and simple

That's bullshit though, isn't it? In a group setting "singling someone out" to talk about their work, or wish them happy birthday, or mention that they've added something to their email signature so they clearly want everyone to know it,....none of those are actually bullying. You know that.

You can#t just say things and make them true.

Those who say this is not bullying are gaslighting, it is patently obvious that the intent was to ridicule the person and a reasonable person would take it as such

You're the one who is gaslighting women into accepting men in their safe spaces!

We haven’t heard how Paul reacted. Perhaps if he had been told in advance that OP was planning to do this he would have happily explained his reasons for including his pronouns (assuming he didn’t actually do that, having been put on the spot unexpectedly)

singling someone out in a group setting is bullying plain and simple. Adding pronouns is not so people know how to address you (unless you are trans), it is a way of letting people know you empathize that how people identify may not be immediately obvious. While we may not agree with pronouns, someone adding them is only following the (wrongly perhaps) generally accepted best practice for inclusivity.
Those who say this is not bullying are gaslighting, it is patently obvious that the intent was to ridicule the person and a reasonable person would take it as such

Absolutely, we cannot win, we state the pronouns and we are accused of piss taking, unprofessionalism, sarcasm, bullying, bullshit.
We dont state the pronouns, we are not invested, literally killing people, taking the piss, bullying , othering.
Either way, women cannot win, unless they are the other type of women.

If Paul had added his pronouns as serious 'allyship' for potential trans colleagues, rather than lazy virtue signalling, then the OP gave him the perfect introduction for him to explain this.

However, mental health statistics for those who are trans are shocking

Shocking in that they are usually entirely invented.

So Paul (a bloke) is allowed to embrace pronouns yet I (a middle aged woman) am not and if I do a bloke can complain about me doing so?

You've hit the nail on the head by identifying the manipulation, op.

We are supposed to use them. Indeed, we are expected to pretend to take them seriously.
If we show people that we are actually taking them seriously, without being impressed, indeed even contemptuous, then the manipulation and compulsion element disappears.

No one who has the slightest knowledge of this ideology can be unaware of how intimidation and threats are integral to it.
The bonkers overreaction to misgendering is an example.

You starting to look like you aren't being compelled, despite it being something that you probably don't agree with, isn't playing the game, is it.

I imagine your reaction to Paul was meant to be admiring of his bravery or progressiveness, or maybe it was expected that you would be slightly uncomfortable. Who knows? Perhaps Paul was looking forward to an opportunity to educate you about allyship.

I don't imagine, for a single minute, that you were meant to take it seriously enough to accommodate it 100%, whilst remaining singularity unimpressed.

And that's what are the naysayers on this thread are upset about. You are actively taking it seriously, but you're not being compelled, or forced to agree with the ideology.

You're doing it on your own terms. And therefore robbing it of it being on someone else's.

Not allowed.

Reminds me of new graduate trainees proudly putting "First Name Surname BA (Hons)" in their email signatures until they realise it makes them look like a bellend.

It would also prevent people inadvertently offending with blasphemous phrases such as ‘oh god’, inappropriately offering pork/bacon/non halal food, saying ‘happy Christmas’ to Jehovah’s witnesses, offering food during fasting etc.
now I think about it this would have ten times the benefits that pronouns do.

Indeed. This would save confusion around religious holidays especially. We’d all know who to not say certain phrases too. Much more useful than pronouns.

Well I do have a religion. And people have made unkind comments about it over the years. Perhaps everyone could state their beliefs in their email signatures so as to be aware of others’ beliefs and not offend?

Seriously considering changing my email signature to:

Kind regards,
Feisty
Gender Identity: don't have one
Religious Belief: don't have one
Disability: don't have one
Glad we cleared that up. Can we get some work done now please?

But I have a feeling work might view that as a provocative act?!?!

I get that the implications of including pronouns in your email signature may vary depending on your work place. I haven’t told anyone else here that they should do it.

In my situation there is little downside to doing it - my workplace is about 65% women, and I genuinely have never felt that being a woman caused me any disadvantage. We have a small number of trans and non-binary colleagues. I’d say about 25-40% of colleagues include pronouns in their email signatures. There’s no drama, no argument, it doesn’t interfere with us doing our jobs. Those who don’t do it aren’t criticised or pressured.

Some people have also now started including an explainer of how to pronounce their name in their email signature, which can be very helpful.

when people say ‘sensible discussion’, what do they mean? Where would this discussion take place? How would the result of such ‘discussion’ be implemented?

I don’t think you understand that this is about much more than putting a few harmless letters at the end of an email signature. And compelling others to do things they don’t want to do ‘because of my mental health’ is nothing short of emotional blackmail.

Thanks @IcakethereforeIam i hope you managed to get a reasonable amount of sleep!

Classics? Seriously. 🙄

If those pushing for the universal use of pronoun declarations think that the majority are going to take it seriously then they will be disappointed. No matter how hard the thought police tell us how wonderful they are it's not going to happen.

I dont understand how you knew it was a woman. What pronouns can be used to signify a woman?

Doing @mnhq does not send them a message. If you want to nominate a thread for classics you need to report it. I think they then discuss it... I'd take a guess some staff would enjoy this thread, others might view it as NITS.