Sex Education Curriculum for the Department for Education

Beowulfa Yesterday 10:42
I'd love teenagers to hear an intelligent, confident, stunning young woman say being a virgin was really no big deal
So true. Sadly what many children now get from the dodgy sex ed providers is a diet of sex work is a great choice, kink and fetish are so desirable (and let me tell you what it entails) and anal / choking / inflicting pain etc can be oh so pleasurable (and let me show you how).

Returning the sex ed curriculum to something that's in children's best interests can't happen soon enough.

Beowulfa Yesterday 10:42
I'd love teenagers to hear an intelligent, confident, stunning young woman say being a virgin was really no big deal.

I agree. Some young women I know were like this. and up to an older age. They are both beautiful, attractive, clever, good at what they do, and have very happy, secure, family backgrounds.

It was just that they were so sure of themselves that they knew they only wanted to be with someone when they felt sure.

Sorry, I didn’t mean ‘starting with’.
That’s it.

Yes, add something about the heart of relationships starting with the simplest, the feelings for family, friends, pets, the world of nature; and the mutual respect and care we show each other, reciprocally. Also our relationship with ourselves - we care for and respect ourselves too.

I think you are right though about the rest.

Looking back on my day PP the strongest messages we girls got (not sure from where as we had zero sex education) was don't get pregnant, seriously absolutely do not get pregnant, wait until you're 16 and have a nice first partner. Probably from magazines and the media.

Anything extra was gleaned from More magazine. Or late night on channel 4.

When I went to university one of my new friends, who'd done a gap year so was older, was a virgin and completely unfazed by this. In her own words "I haven't met anyone I fancy enough to get naked with." I think she was 21 when she had her first sexual relationship. It made an extremely strong impression on me, one that I still remember ~25 years later.

I'd love teenagers to hear an intelligent, confident, stunning young woman say being a virgin was really no big deal.

I agree with this too. Sex is a conversation, a communication. Not a series of acts that one must be taught how to do.
As the OP says, explain the basics and pregnancy, talk about safety, teach about proper consent. There is so much pressure on girls to be sexually active that I don’t think they ever realise this is coercion, that pressuring someone emotionally using manipulation is abuse.

Hmm there is one form of sex which is not like the others. One which can lead to pregnancy and this must be taught too.

I'm wrong and there is a form of sex which must be explicitly labelled.

I think children should be taught that if they move in with a partner, they don't have equal rights to the house if they are unmarried and their name isn't on the mortgage. Too many people are treated terribly by partners and they don't have the safety net that marriage provides when this happens.

@achillestoes I disagree with making some sex acts more special called out than others. That's how we got to homophobia in the first place.
Teaching children not to deride other people's sexual discovery, however it happens, as long as it is safe and consensual, is of more value than the label we give it. There's a fine line in there for them to recognise when their peers are being abused which is difficult to teach.
If you want to reduce homophobia, the children need to just see it as sex, not special sex for special people.

Age of consent and why - risk of health and mental health issues with children having sex too young - therefore the teenagers should not have sexual activity with someone younger than them and below the age of consent (it is illegal for good reason and they may be charged).

pornography - it is legal for over 18s but has links with sex trafficking and may not be truly consensual. Certainly that featuring minors would constitute child sex abuse as they cannot consent (as they do not understand the implications). what is depicted may not show proper consent, so if you tried to do the same thing in real life you may find yourself charged with rape. Addiction. Sexting and it’s dangers (blackmail, revenge porn - how to seek help if you are in this position). Grooming.

places you can go for help if you feel someone may have crossed your boundaries (even if you are not sure) or have worries about contraception, STDs or pregnancy - parent, GP, school nurse. How to deal with unwanted touching. Penalties for non-consensual touching.

Absolutely 👏

In the send setting it has to be exceptionally clear. No room for misunderstanding.

it’s being prostituted, not ‘sex work"

That's why I used quotes in my post. And I don't think that "will" is much of an exaggeration if they're on social media. OnlyFans is "sex work" too.

Adolescents don't need a prescription of how to do sex. Sex is an experience of discovery between consenting people. It is important that the teachers or facilitators don't impose their opinions, as that could be grooming.

This is so obvious and common sense, and yet.....here we are

Absolutely agree with text in bold, especially use of “overcorrection”.

@TastefulRainbowUnicorn

There’s a risk of scaring the shit out of young people by teaching them that people ‘will’ try to get them involved in ‘sex work’. Teach consent. Teach them how to keep themselves safe. Don’t terrify them. And it’s being prostituted, not ‘sex work’.

Isn't it usually sex and relationships education? I think kids should be taught the red flags of a potentially abusive partner. Gift of Fear. What respect actually looks like. How predatory adults behave and the kind of things they say. How to set boundaries and screen out people who don't respect their boundaries.

They should also be taught about trauma, its symptoms, and what typical coping mechanisms for trauma are. A lot of girls, especially, have been sexually abused. They should be taught that predators will try to groom them into "sex work" and the relationship between sex work and trauma.

And while I'm wishing, they should all get a pony. But I think if we lived in an even slightly less woman-hating time, this would be an eminently reasonable list. I'm not wishing for the moon, or even for abusers to stop abusing. Just for kids to be taught how to avoid abusers, and how to articulate the consequences of abuse they've already suffered (instead of turning to the Internet for terrible strategies re the latter.)

@Mysterioso

I can’t agree there. Homophobia is a serious problem in the UK (less than it once was but also on the rise again). It’s right that kids should know that some (lots of) people are gay/bi and that’s fine.

No child needs to know that they can be hetero-, homo-, bi or a-sexual. No one needs to live by anyone else's sexual standards or labels.
Children need to understand consent and a consensual mechanism for exploring other people's bodies and knowing when something is beyond their personal comfort zone.
The rest is their discovery to make.

CoE will now perform same sex marriages so long as one of the couple identifies as the opposite sex.

There's a current thread about this.

It was actually LookingandThinking who made the great comment about overcorrection Fenlandia. It chimed with my thinking.
As someone who's taught SRE lessons in a number of inner city schools, a common thread was planning for mixed experiences, understanding and needs that a group of children would have. Including the awareness that for some children this might be the first time they'd be confronted with this information. We'd agonise about those we knew had been sexually abused, those with special needs, particular religious demands and as a result the content was careful, factual and focused on consent and safety. We knew that mainstream lessons were not the place for graphic sexual content to be explored. Yet we seem to have lost this understanding and are prioritising the demands of adults over invested in talking at children about their views about sex.
And I'm sorry if my previous post was intemperate but it's time people woke up and looked closely at some of the people shouting loudest about children needing to be taught about sex / porn / gender politics by them. Because this is (as usual) about those adults and their demands and nothing to do with what children need.

There is civil partnership for homosexual adults.

Huh? Marriage is available both for same-sex couples and for opposite-sex couples. Both types of couples can also get a civil partnership if they prefer. Married couples should be referred to as married. Civil-partnered couples should be referred to as civil partners.

You may mean there is civil marriage for gay couples; this is also incorrect, if by this you mean that gay couples can only access civil marriage. Legally valid religious marriage is also available across the UK for gay couples, though many churches and other religions entitled to create legally binding marriages have opted not to perform these for same-sex couples (and the Church of England is legally banned from doing so).

Among the religions which will perform a legally valid wedding for a same-sex couple in England & Wales are the Methodists, the Unitarians, the Quakers, Liberal Judaism and Reform Judaism.

Miriam Cates and yes she is.

I saw a review committee recently I think, lady in a floral dress speaking about the dfe and phse lessons-can't find the link to it now but she was fabulous