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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

LGB Alliance to plan helpline with Lottery funding

959 replies

pombear · 10/06/2022 20:29

Fantastic news.

I would link to their Twitter announcement, but in usual state of play, Twitter has marked it ' may not be appropriate for people under 18'. A helpline planned for 13 to 25 year olds, planned by a panel of experts in child protection, education, helpline delivery, fundraising and psychology.

Yep - shut them down (much better to have helplines planned by IT workers who took their child to Thailand...)

As LGB Alliance state there is no dedicated national service of its kind for young LGB people in the UK.

I'm sure the Lottery Fund will be getting a lot of feedback right now, given the outpouring of hyperbole against LGB Alliance right now on Twitter.

So they may appreciate feedback from those who may see this as a positive move too:

""We really value your feedback. If you have a comment or complaint about the services that we provide, or if there's something important you think we should know, we'd love to hear it. Please email us at [email protected]"

LGB Alliance to plan helpline with Lottery funding
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17
Helleofabore · 18/06/2022 08:44

EmpressaurusWitchDoesntBurn · 18/06/2022 06:36

When I say 'trans woman' I mean exactly that, not a man. So a trans woman who is attracted to a woman is a lesbian.

That’s what I thought you meant. And the part about Nancy Kelley of Stonewall and the barrister at Allison Bailey’s tribunal both equating lesbianism (the old-fashioned same-sex-attracted kind) with racism….????

There seems a determined ignoring of the statement from Nancy Kelley and the incredible comparison from Cathryn McGahey and the statement by McKinnon that lesbians should cope with penis in vagina sex to accommodate the ‘needs’ of transitioned males.

I mean, we have been asking now for pages and pages and pages.

And nothing….

Well maybe starlee really cannot see it when people who agree with starlee say such outrageously egregious statements. Wasn’t there a doubling down where it was declared that ‘no-one’ was saying it?

The quote has been posted in this thread too. So it is not like it can be denied being made.

NonnyMouse1337 · 18/06/2022 08:20

To repeat Empressaurus' question

Is Nancy Kelley’s line that homosexuality is equivalent to racism helpful to a young LGB person?

onlything · 18/06/2022 07:44

An lgba helpline really aren't going to tell any trans kids who who aren't sure that they really are trans, they will tell them they are gay or lesbian

I would hope they would, as Helen Joyce said...

We need to reduce the amount of people who transition as they are a huge problem to a sane world.

Conflictedunicorn · 18/06/2022 06:38

Indeed @ZombieMumEB i used to be in the ‘be kind’ brigade until I unintentionally offended a TW by asking a question. I got told to ‘educate yourself’. So I did. It did not turn out the way the TWAW brigade wanted. I had questions, they responded with the same phrases as @Starlee. I realised they had no concrete arguments so here I am, now totally GC. Worst thing for their cause is tell people to educate themselves.

EmpressaurusWitchDoesntBurn · 18/06/2022 06:36

When I say 'trans woman' I mean exactly that, not a man. So a trans woman who is attracted to a woman is a lesbian.

That’s what I thought you meant. And the part about Nancy Kelley of Stonewall and the barrister at Allison Bailey’s tribunal both equating lesbianism (the old-fashioned same-sex-attracted kind) with racism….????

334bu · 18/06/2022 06:35

How many more times? Yes, I would consider a trans woman attracted to a woman to be a lesbian.

So you deny the existence of same sex attracted women by appropriating their name, this is homophobia. Do you also support conversion therapy for lesbians?

ZombieMumEB · 18/06/2022 06:12

@Starlee
No I don't believe in a 'greater being' as in a god etc, but I do believe there is a soul, essence, that inner being or whatever you choose to call it that makes a person uniquely them.

So, a personality?

@Conflictedunicorn
@starlee so you say as a non trans person you cannot understand how a transperson feels. So how could a male understand what is I’d to ‘feel like a woman?
One of the many areas where applying logic and critical thinking skills to the TRA trope, shows how it's all horseshit nonsense.

Conflictedunicorn · 18/06/2022 05:29

Starlee · 18/06/2022 03:32

No I don't believe in a 'greater being' as in a god etc, but I do believe there is a soul, essence, that inner being or whatever you choose to call it that makes a person uniquely them.

And I believe that 'inner being' can feel at odds with the body because I've seen for myself the changes before and after transitioning and it's not something that can be 'put on' if it's not real.

Yes I'm trying to explain things as I know it, but I'm not a trans person and with the best will in the world I can't put myself in their shoes and truly understand how they feel, but I care enough to try and do support them 100%.
And that doesn't mean that I'm homophobic which some here have accused me of being.

@starlee so you say as a non trans person you cannot understand how a transperson feels. So how could a male understand what is I’d to ‘feel like a woman? No male is a woman and no female is a man. Are you claiming transpeople have magical powers not gifted to the rest of us poor mortals, or are you starting to realise that this cannot be possible.

Starlee · 18/06/2022 03:32

DeaconBoo · 17/06/2022 08:19

Also @Starlee you didn't answer my question about wrong bodies.

So you acknowledge that to believe that, you have to have a belief in a soul and some greater being that has 'intended' bodies for those souls to go in?

More importantly, what do you mean by 'match'? Can you be specific - which kinds of souls/minds/psyches 'match' which kinds of bodies?

If you don't know, could you please at least have the courtesy to say so instead of ignoring me? You quoted an older question of mine and repeated an answer to that question that you'd already given, so perhaps you hadn't spotted my following question.

You're telling us to chat to trans people to find out - yet you're here, you're trying to explain lots of things about gender but it's pointless if you can't clarify what you mean when you are asked.

No I don't believe in a 'greater being' as in a god etc, but I do believe there is a soul, essence, that inner being or whatever you choose to call it that makes a person uniquely them.

And I believe that 'inner being' can feel at odds with the body because I've seen for myself the changes before and after transitioning and it's not something that can be 'put on' if it's not real.

Yes I'm trying to explain things as I know it, but I'm not a trans person and with the best will in the world I can't put myself in their shoes and truly understand how they feel, but I care enough to try and do support them 100%.
And that doesn't mean that I'm homophobic which some here have accused me of being.

Helleofabore · 18/06/2022 02:57

An lgba helpline really aren't going to tell any trans kids who who aren't sure that they really are trans, they will tell them they are gay or lesbian which can only cause harm to the trans kids..

Did you actually read what you posted here?

Would you like to clarify this, or are you happy that it comes across as you now saying a helpline should be telling a child that they are trans or not?

And either way, we are back to asking you for evidence that LGB Alliance helpline staff will be telling anyone who is and isn’t ‘trans’ or even ‘LGB’.

Got any evidence of that?

Did you contact the LGB Alliance directly, as I suggested, to get confirmation on how they would advise any caller on a specific issue?

But please clarify if you mean to say that any helpline should be telling any child they are trans? It could be a typo which is fully acceptable on this a forum without an edit capability.

Starlee · 18/06/2022 02:54

DeaconBoo · 17/06/2022 08:13

starlee i asked "You believe that heterosexual (ie a person of one sex attracted solely to people of the opposite sex) people can be gay, don't you?"

You said, about a "biologically male transwoman attracted to women" that they would be a lesbian.

It looked like you were answering my question as "yes" with that answer. Are you now changing it?

How many more times? Yes, I would consider a trans woman attracted to a woman to be a lesbian.

Helleofabore · 18/06/2022 02:47

Sounds like you've run our of things to whinge about so now you're making things up. You need to get a life.

Thank you. That gave me quite a laugh. My comments about your persistent lack of coherent argument and evidence to support your too frequently hyperbolic claims is me ‘whinging’.
Too funny.

I could tell you to similarly get a life but In truth, your posts have provided a live demonstration of the tactics of extreme activism and the lack of solid foundation that those activist points of view have

Helleofabore · 18/06/2022 02:47

I am not speaking as "a spokesperson for ALL trans people" I speak for the people I know and have spoken to.
No-one is claiming to have been "appointed as a spokesperson for ALL trans people": Show me where exactly I have claimed "the authority to declare who is worthy of being called trans and who is not?"

Did you not post the below as a description of the only people who would be ‘trans’ that support LGB Alliance.

“"There are supporters of LGB Alliance who are trans". They will be a relative few who have completed the whole process in days when they weren't at the mercy of increasingly long waiting lists - currently up to 7 YEARS for a first appointment a gender reassignment clinic depending on where in the country you live. They see themselves as 'special', genuine, yet denigrate other trans people still stuck in that ever increasing waiting list for treatment, even though they are still covered under the Equality Act as a "Protected characteristic".'”

“'Of course not all post-op trans come under that label, as ever it's the loudest minority who get heard, the rest are more than happy to support those who are still going through what they themselves have already been through.'”

So, in effect, with this absolute statement, I believe you have placed yourself in a position of arbitrating who is and isn’t ‘trans’ amongst LGB Alliance supporters. That is the problem with making such absolute statements.

I would suggest that LGB Alliance likely has a wide range of trans people who support them, that will have a wide range of opinions. What they will have in common is that they believe that LGB people need to have a voice separate to the TQ+ people and therefore support an organisation that does that.

By the way, any evidence of trans people who are supporters of LGB Alliance denigrating other trans people? Surely you can support this particular claim …

Starlee · 18/06/2022 02:39

TastefulRainbowUnicorn · 17/06/2022 07:38

Yes, you have. You have confirmed that you think a “trans lesbian” i.e. a male attracted to women, i.e. opposite sex attracted, is homosexual. From that, the other points in my comment follow.

You’ve also made it clear in other posts that you don’t even understand what is meant by the letters LGB in “LGB Alliance.” It’s fucking pathetic.

No I haven't, don't tell me what I've confirmed, I mean what I said, you are twisting it to what you believe, different thing entirely.

When I say 'trans woman' I mean exactly that, not a man. So a trans woman who is attracted to a woman is a lesbian.

And being Bi I know exactly what LGB means thank you. I don't know what they mean by 'alliance' though, they're certainly not allianced to the majority of the LGB movement who actually welcome the TQ+.

Starlee · 18/06/2022 02:18

@Helleofabore

Kids in the past didn't have access to info like they do today, they assumed they were gay because that's all they'd heard about. And then finally they realise, often after many years, sometimes decades, that they are actually trans and everything becomes clear. THAT is what you will be told over and over again if you actually listen to trans people talk of their own experiences, they're not my words.

So, were they males sexually attracted to males or females attracted to females?
You acknowledge that they could have benefited from support to identify if they were L, G or B so they could have worked out their needs earlier.
Yet you are attempting to deny young people today greater access to services that can assist them?

No I didn't say that, stop twisting my words.
And who they were attracted to is irrelevant here.

The trans kids I'm talking about assumed that they were gay, or lesbian, because they knew no better but knew they were 'different'. They needed help much earlier to identify that they were actually trans, without having to endure the wasted years of not understanding.

An lgba helpline really aren't going to tell any trans kids who who aren't sure that they really are trans, they will tell them they are gay or lesbian which can only cause harm to the trans kids..

ControversialOpening · 18/06/2022 02:12

@Starlee

It would depend on whether you believe a trans man or trans women are who they say they are. I do.

So you believe that this is a woman:

www.stokesentinel.co.uk/news/stoke-on-trent-news/sex-beast-carried-out-campaign-7207216

That's a serious question, by the way - not a 'gotcha'. 'Rose Whitby' says Rose is a woman. Do you believe Rose?

Helleofabore · 18/06/2022 02:01

Starlee · 17/06/2022 23:54

@Helleofabore "And yes, they are actually allow to provide a service just for LGB Alliance and not specifically to support 'trans people' being trans. That is a 'discrimination' that is allowed in law exactly for this purpose."

Once again, I have never opposed support for LGB people. What concerns me about the LGBAlliance in particular is that if a young trans person phones them for help (mistaking them for an inclusive lgbt+ helpline) they are highly unlikely to receive UN-biased help, they won't immediately be re-directed to a more inclusive helpline but will no doubt get the usual lgba spiel of "more likely to grow up as lesbian or gay", which is no help to a young trans person.

Once again, I have never opposed support for LGB people. What concerns me about the LGBAlliance in particular is that if a young trans person phones them for help (mistaking them for an inclusive lgbt+ helpline) they are highly unlikely to receive UN-biased help, they won't immediately be re-directed to a more inclusive helpline but will no doubt get the usual lgba spiel of "more likely to grow up as lesbian or gay", which is no help to a young trans person.

Why would a trans person be calling LGB Alliance helpline for help or advice about a trans issue? And if a trans person called about a LGB issue, why wouldn’t the person provide ‘UNbiased’ help?

You can provide no evidence for your claim that LGB Alliance would either NOT refer them immediately to a helpline that is more suitable for the unique need of that trans person if they are not calling about an LGB issue, OR would say anything about ‘more likely to grow up as lesbian or gay’.

Instead, you have continued to make hugely prejudiced claims. You have accused an organisation of being unable to provide a service for LGB young people on LGB issues, to the same standard as any other LGB only group, yet you don’t seem to be able to link up one shred of evidence to support your claim.

Ereshkigalangcleg · 18/06/2022 01:44

It is how a lot of trans people describe how they feel. Who are we to tell them they're wrong to say it?

They can say what they like, I don't have to believe it. Just as when someone says they have had a conversation with God, that's fine, I will most likely just nod politely, but if they say God told them that I was a witch and they should burn me, I'm going to have something to say about their belief, truly felt though it may be.

Helleofabore · 18/06/2022 01:32

Starlee · 17/06/2022 23:39

My trans daughter is no longer a teenager, but I am still her mother and my opinion and experience is as valid as anyone else's.

I have no idea why you feel this is relevant to what I actually said in that post….

Starlee · 18/06/2022 01:00

ANewCreation · 16/06/2022 19:27

Hi Starlee or Hearach

You might well have missed my earlier question so thought I will ask again.

My oldest used to say that they were a transgirl but, for the last year or so, says that they now see themself as non binary. They also say that they are gay.

From your experience of the current thinking in the LGBTQ+ community, would you say that means my oldest's gay sexual orientation is more likely to be towards male people (ie same sex attracted) or female people (ie same gender attracted)?

Thanks for any clarity you can give.

I have already answered you. Can't remember the exact words but it would have been along the lines of asking your oldest yourself, they can give you far more clarity on their sexual orientation than a stranger can. Everyone is different, there is no 'one size fits all'.
As far as I'm concerned anyone can be attracted to whoever they want, regardless of sex, gender or labels. It's the actual person that matters for me, and if the other person feels the same.

ZombieMumEB · 18/06/2022 00:13

@Starlee
What concerns me about the LGBAlliance in particular is that if a young trans person phones them for help (mistaking them for an inclusive lgbt+ helpline) they are highly unlikely to receive UN-biased help, they won't immediately be re-directed to a more inclusive helpline but will no doubt get the usual lgba spiel of "more likely to grow up as lesbian or gay", which is no help to a young trans person.

Are you insulting the intelligence of young trans people?

What service is better:

  • one that knows the difference between sex, gender and gender identity and knows the law in regards to the Equality Act?
or
  • one that conflates all 3 terms and is part of an organisation that lies to others in regards to the Equality Act, because they don't understand the law?
Starlee · 18/06/2022 00:12

NotKevinTurvey · 16/06/2022 16:31

You think people on here believe that someone attracted to a man is a lesbian?

Do you even know what you are trying to say at this point? How can a woman, acting as a man, but attracted to an actual, real man, be a lesbian?

It would depend on whether you believe a trans man or trans women are who they say they are. I do.
But in that one instance I made a typo, "A trans man attracted to a man I would call gay, you would probably call them straight" (not lesbian of course).

EmpressaurusWitchDoesntBurn · 18/06/2022 00:04

And is Nancy Kelley’s line that homosexuality is equivalent to racism helpful to a young LGB person?

Starlee · 18/06/2022 00:02

DeaconBoo · 16/06/2022 15:56

Ok, so starlee confirms that heterosexual people can be gay, so there's no issue with heterosexual people supporting the LGBAlliance, as someone posted upthread.

And where am I supposed to have confirmed that? It's not for me to confirm anyone's sexuality but my own.

And heterosexual people can support whoever the hell they want, doesn't mean I have to agree with them. Stop making things up.

Starlee · 17/06/2022 23:54

Helleofabore · 16/06/2022 15:33

it is the stated reason for their existence, as in their mission statement

Have we pivoted now from "The LGBA was actually set up to oppose Stonewall, and they do admit that in their opening mission statement."? to being a less specific "the LGBA was set up with the sole purpose of opposing gender identity"

"Supporting them is supporting the opposition and discrimination of trans people."

Maybe you could post a link to support your claim that LGB Alliance is supporting the 'opposition' of trans people.

And yes, they are actually allow to provide a service just for LGB Alliance and not specifically to support 'trans people' being trans. That is a 'discrimination' that is allowed in law exactly for this purpose.

Discrimination by itself is not the evil word you are portraying it to be.

@Helleofabore "And yes, they are actually allow to provide a service just for LGB Alliance and not specifically to support 'trans people' being trans. That is a 'discrimination' that is allowed in law exactly for this purpose."

Once again, I have never opposed support for LGB people. What concerns me about the LGBAlliance in particular is that if a young trans person phones them for help (mistaking them for an inclusive lgbt+ helpline) they are highly unlikely to receive UN-biased help, they won't immediately be re-directed to a more inclusive helpline but will no doubt get the usual lgba spiel of "more likely to grow up as lesbian or gay", which is no help to a young trans person.