DM - Teenage girls having their breasts cut off will not solve their emotional problems, says founder of Transgender Trend STEPHANIE DAVIES-ARAI

Well done Belle.
Children and teenagers desperately need rational adults in schools who care and have clear boundaries that keep them safe. Adults in thrall to an ideology that coerces children and persuades them their growing bodies need fixing are both naive and dangerous.

@Unwantedgift

Thank you! I’ve been teaching nearly 20 years. In the first decade of my career, one student had gender dysphoria (strongly suspect undiagnosed autism). Then I went on mat leave and, when I returned, the entire ‘Emo’/alternative/goth population had started talking about being born in the wrong body. At the same time, my dad, who was senior leadership at a different school, was dealing with a new generation of unhappy students who identified out of their birth sex.

I guess I’m just too old and have seen too many fads I think the children are genuinely playing with their identity and discovering their personalities, which I wholeheartedly endorse. I avoid using pronouns at all, and call them the name their parents want me to call them, because I’m an adult and they need me to be the red line in order to feel safe.

Just to say thank you @BelleTheBananas for doing that at school. You’re doing such a service to the world for challenging the echo chambers.

I wore a skirt this week and realised it’s the first time for literally months as I’ve lived in jeans and cargo trousers. I’m clearly a trans man too 🙄

Or…wait….maybe this is the effing 21st century and I, a woman, can wear wtf I want? 🤔

Totally not about regressive stereotypes though. No, Sirree! 🙄 I feel sorry for the small number of people with GD who’ve been swamped and talked over by the hordes of gender ideologists who think we should all define ourselves by 1950s stereotypes and trivialised GD into something like a batshit form of emo where any old crap goes.

Also this part of @mrshoho’s post:

It was around this time she said there was something wrong with her because she wasn't sexually attracted to boys or girls and gave herself a label of asexual. I told her she didn't need a label and that at 14 it was fine to not have any sexual interests. She developed her own style of loose t shirts and jogging bottoms and is now holding her head up when out and about. She is socially immature and still not interested in sexual relationships at 17 but now sees that as ok.

14! And a gender ideologue on this thread is saying “oh it sounds like she’s asexual”. At 14 I was reading pony stories and The Chalet School and looking after my guinea pigs and going to girl guide camp. Even at 17 (when I thought I was probably bisexual/lesbian but was not very worried about it either), I was in no hurry to have any actual sexual relationship, beyond perhaps mooning over Gillian Anderson in The X-Files. At 17 I was reading The Secret History and listening to REM and doing my UCAS form, and that was completely normal.

Teenagers don’t have to have a label or an “identity”; that’s the point of being teenage. Clothes or what you think about sex don’t define you - either as a teenager or at any point in life!

I feel sorry for today’s teenagers, feeling constantly forced into boxes and constantly seeking outside approval and “validation”. What happened to just being comfortable in yourself?

Anthem for asexual trans youth:

So, we have discovered we are early adopters of being ‘trans guys’ and asexual!!!

wow! Let’s tell our teenagers and maybe they will now consider it very uncool to follow mum’s footsteps.

Seriously fucked up to suggest a teenaged girl is a transguy based on clothes!

Besides which, two of the teenaged ‘transguys’ I know wear more feminine clothes than I do.

It is almost like you have never been a teenaged girl or even have a teenaged girl in your life because this statement fails on all counts as far as my experience goes.

So again, how far down the trench of gender identity ideology are you to suggest such a thing?

mrshoho it sounds like your child might still be asexual and trans. Your child hated wearing skirts, which are typically feminine clothes, and now prefers wearing baggier clothes. This is really common with trans guys, because wearing baggier clothes helps to hide their feminine body shape

LMAO I guess we were all trans guys in the 90s then when wearing an oversized T-shirt and baggy jeans was the fashion. Or maybe girls wearing shalwar kameez are also trans guys because they are wearing baggy clothes to “hide their feminine body shape”?

What absolute tosh. There’s zero historical or feminist analysis or awareness going on here. Don’t like wearing a bodycon dress? You must hate being a woman and want your breasts cut off! FFS. Load of risible nonsense.

And you dont think that could be to avoid pervy blokes leering at their tits and making crass comments rather than anything else?

I mean, really. Honestly. 'baggy clothes'?

FFS.

it sounds like your child may be a girl who prefers wearing baggy clothes. As do many, many women around the world. This is really common with women, because wearing baggier clothes is more comfortable and can hide their body shape.

How far down the entrenched belief system that is gender identity ideology are you?

Have you ever been a teenaged girl or even a woman?

seriously?

I wore baggy clothes, I hated wearing ‘girls’ clothes. It is a ‘female’ experience.

If you are ascribing ‘trans’ experiences to normal reactions such as this … you seem to have a very stereotypical view of the world.

I am gobsmacked that this post was plopped down here. How fucking dare you take a perfectly normal female choice and make it a ‘trans’ choice.

Please get some perspective that is outside of what seems to be a very skewed and unbalanced bubble of experiences.

Thank you for the link! I am usually a lurker because I have little to contribute amongst all the knowledgable women here, but decided yesterday I'd try harder to stop lurking and add my voice.
Loved reading the OP's article about Stephanie, great to know someone promoting a balanced outlook is getting the recognition she needs to publicise this issue.

Me too Clymene The TT website is a mine of information. It's also been great to see so many other new sources of support for parents trying to keep inappropriate adults away from their children as they 'diagnose" and weaponise children in pursuit of their own adult issues.

It must be very hard @mrshoho but it sounds to me like you are leading the way out of this rabbit hole for your daughter with compassion and empathy. Sadly not all children have parents like you.

Stephanie's tireless devotion to children's well being has given so many of us the tools and language to talk to our children about this.

I am forever grateful.

She just shuts me down, stating that I am violating her boundaries if I even try and discuss this with her.
hasn’t it always been the case that teenage children will believe anyone rather than the one that cares most about them.

Given the number of American males who identify as women and are also billionaires, the statistic for transwomen doesn't seem likely to be accurate.

What?!!!

So a girl who felt self conscious about her developing body and found a way to deal with that is 'trans'. Wearing clothes that are baggy to hide your shape when you are growing up makes you trans? We're almost all bloody 'trans' then!

You clearly didnt read as far as 'Now at sixth form she can wear what she likes and she has at times shown a spark of being proud to be a woman'

Thank goodness no-one persuaded her she was trans and took that away from her, eh?

So what point are you making?
"I think women should be paid an equal amount to men!"
"ahh, so you must be a man"

Nobody is making points like that and nobody worth their salt is going to. You're making up arguments and arguing against them to prove why "trans ideology" is so wrong. That's not anything TRAs are saying! That's a future strawman!

Also it doesn't have different cis genders because the study wasn't looking into that. It was just looking at how different members of the lgbtq+ community have significant wage disparities

It doesn't even disaggregate LGBTQ. FFS, what kind of useless set of stats is this?

Like a gay married man, a bisexual man married to a woman, and an out lesbian would have the same experience in the workplace! As if.

No, that is tangential to what I said. What does or does not happen with pay does not contradict my point. My point being that internet denizens tell girls who want respect that wanting respect makes them men.

P.S. interesting that your graph does not disaggregate male workers and female workers. Very interesting.

Reynadotcom

how do you come to that conclusion? There can be any number of reasons someone prefers the clothes they do. Clothing preference does not define a woman and it sounds like she really understands her daughter better than a random internet stranger can diagnose from one anecdote about their lives.

This late stage capitalism, turn yourself into a categorised product by spending, slicing and judging is really starting to grate!

Your post reminds me of the messages she was receiving on her online chat groups. As her parent I see it that she is socially immature and self conscious of her body but is learning to love herself and finding her place in the world. At 14 she was confused and probably would have been easily led down the trans road if we had facilitated her. At 17 she feels much more comfortable and is even proud of being a woman at times so no she is not 'trans'. As far as the 'asexual' label who knows? Maybe as she matures she will feel differently.

Unfortunately the exact opposite is true

We're probably only a couple of years away from people on the internet earnestly assuring our younger sisters and daughters that if they want to receive equal pay to men, that indicates that they are "trans guys". Telling young women that real women find it affirming of their "cis gender identity" when they are taken for granted at work and paid less than male colleagues.