Got referred to as them/they at work today

Here we go with the transphobic shouts.

Sex isn’t assigned.

Trans people are just people. But we shouldn’t all have to state pronouns when sex based are applicable to most. By stating my pronouns as if theres s possibility they could be anything but sex based, means I am giving headspace to gender ideology and I won’t. I don’t buy into gender so what else would my pronouns be? Unless of course people can’t tell I’m female, in which case they can approach me and I will have no issue in stating my sex. Trans people/other that want to, should state their pronouns if they wish to and they should be respected.

Its not a personal attack to say I pity someone and find their comments laughable. If I don’t laugh I might cry. 😬

Yes, its much better to ignore the email and then moan about the outcome.

I wouldnt have an issue with someone refusing their pronouns at work, because I think it outs people who might not want to be.

Or.....imagine....TALK to the person. OP has no idea who authorised it, and has decided its someone in HR, but she actually has no idea.

You cannot be this ridiculous.

Your sex was assigned to you at the moment you were conceived!! If you're going to be obtuse, at least learn the terms!

We are talking about toilets though and thats a different argumnet. This is about email pronouns.

Sex based are not "good" to trans people. You are bordering on transphobic here, its clear you have no tolerance for trans but you can't put that on everyone else.

Re the personal attack

"I just pity people like you to be honest. It’s embarrassing even reading your comments. Caring about some but not others but you actually think you’re being inclusive. Laughable."

No?

Explained her position....you could realise many people are scared of being called transphobic if they do this.

The default should be sex based unless you state otherwise. The vast, vast majority use sex based pronouns. Why would you think anything else, unless you’re told otherwise? I’m not going to state my pronouns, that’s for the prople that want to. And then people should respect them and try to use them. For everyone else ..MOST..nothing needs to be done. It’s crazy that everyone has to opt in to something that applies to a few. 😅 We should respect those few, but we don’t all need to state our pronouns to validate them.

No, Cis apparently describes a person who has a gender identity that matches their sex ‘assigned’ at birth. Being as I have no gender and my sex was observed by looking at my genitals, rather than randomly assigned by a doctor with her eyes shut, please tell me how I’m cis. 😂

The way ‘we’ speak about trans people? I speak about them as I would any other human being. At work, they should be getting on with their job, same as anyone else. It’s no business of mine how people present, I’ll use their pronouns if they let me know what they have opted for. They shouldn’t get to influence mine in any way, sex based are good. Obviously, trans people should use the work toilets that align with their sex.

personal attack....okay. 😜

No, no she didn't.

She IGNORED the email. It's in the OP. She could have emailed back and explained her position. So they've gone with they to cover their arse.

it's not about telling sex, you're being obtuse here.

No she didn’t. She chose to stay with the system that’s been in place for years. The one which doesn’t require us to state pronouns. Those that wish to volunteer them should, those that don’t should be referred to by sex based pronouns.

If anyone can’t tell my sex...lol....then they can contact me.

OP excluded herself!

Cis female is identifying with the sex you were born with.

Re your second paragraph - I DONT AGREE WITH PRONOUNS, in a work place. I can just see why they've responded the way they have.

I just don't like the way we speak about trans people.

Course your feelings bloody matter! I'm pointing out that no one is doing it to be an arse. I wouldn't call you it because I know people find it offensive on here. But explain that to my 65 year old colleague who did 2 and a half hour training on Monday and as part of that had to explain what a cis woman is!

Your personal attack doesn't bother me, because you've got me wrong in the first place.

🤣 It’s really lost on some isn’t it. So busy being inclusive that they don’t see how they’re excluding huge amounts of people. I just laugh at them, what else can you do. 🤡

Listen to yourself. Who says it’s better to call me they? Certainly not me. Why is no one worrying about my ‘feels’? As for cis, if you don’t believe in gender ideology then cis can’t be a thing and if it offensive. Again why do my feelings not matter, only other people’s? 🤔

I just pity people like you to be honest. It’s embarrassing even reading your comments. Caring about some but not others but you actually think you’re being inclusive. Laughable.

Brilliant, thanks for the input @lane

yes, but its not all about you.
oh, the irony.

Because its better to call you they (since you dont believe in it anyway) than call you she and be wrong.

Re cis - I work in a school and it was part of our training. You can find it offensive all you want, it's a recognised term.

Why would someone assume I’m not male or female just because a very, very small minority identify that way? Why is it ok for them to assume I’m not female? That assumes I buy into gender and I don’t. It’s all set up for gender isn’t it. I could be quite offended. 🙄 Like when I’m called cis, how the fuck can I be cis when I have no gender and don’t believe in it. But apparently it’s ok for me to be called that by others. The whole thing is tiresome.

I don’t have to validate other people’s ideology. I don’t live my life doing that.

Of course it is! they implies neither male nor female.

yes, but its not all about you.

If non-binary people in need of they pronouns are a real thing, then it's no more neutral to call someone they than it is to use sex based pronouns.

I’m not concerned with being nice, I’m concerned with reality. Pronouns are sex based unless you want to tell someone different. If someone called me ‘they’, I’d just think 🙄 No time for the bullshit at work, let me get on with my job. The reason people are saying just answer the question is because of gender. I don’t buy into gender ideology, so why would I answer. People have managed to correctly tell my sex for 40 years.

But theyre not going to assume are they.

What if OP is trans and doesnt want to tell anyone and doesnt want outed, but doesnt want to lie?

They is better than misgendering or outing.

If she just answered the bloody question, she'd have been fine.

Nobody is "desperate" to tell you anything, thats not a nice phrase really.

Why is the default not sex based pronouns? Gender believers are generally desperate to tell you their pronouns, pretty safe to assume if someone doesn’t, then they’re happy with good old fashioned sex based ones. They don’t need stating, they just are.

Just as others like to be referred to as They and Them and will say so, o would say I’d preferred to be called by name or referred to as she or her

They didnt make it mandatory.

They asked for pronouns and OP didnt give one, so they went for they.