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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

I think i encountered a fellow traveller at work today. We briefly mentioned Adam Tickell...

36 replies

BenCooperisaGod · 04/05/2022 17:27

And looked at eachother a bit uncertainly.

If you are on here just say something dinosaur related the next time our paths cross.

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IcakethereforeIam · 19/05/2022 00:03

She might be weak not woke.

Actually that's unfair but I liked the alliteration.

Wauden · 18/05/2022 23:48

Oh no!

BenCooperisaGod · 13/05/2022 21:14

She has pronouns on her e mail signature 😰

OP posts:
Shortpoet · 11/05/2022 19:05

Do read it. It shows how quickly society can take away women’s rights (which is why Margaret Atwood really ought to know better).
There’s a free pdf version online if you Google it.

Wauden · 11/05/2022 19:01

@Shortpoet I have not read the Handmaid's Tale, but your quotes from it make me want to!

Wauden · 11/05/2022 18:59

I have a coaster with a suffragette poster image on it. Maybe l could put it on a work desk, or let it accidentally fall out if my handbag.

SpringLobelia · 06/05/2022 09:08

I looked up dinosaur jewellery but managed to buy a dinosaur tshirt in my size instead. I have been enjoying wearing it.

Jellycatspyjamas · 06/05/2022 08:19

@Ratonastick that’s a lovely brooch, I’ve just ordered one - it’ll look lovely on a new blazer I’ve bought and plan to wear a lot.

Shortpoet · 06/05/2022 07:46

We’ll I didn’t mean that specific word. It was more in the spirit of Margaret Atwood should understand better what women are up against and how we give coded messages.

But Offred does find a way to use it when it isn’t May.

——
I've only known her since May," I say. I can feel my skin growing hot, my heart speeding up. This is tricky. For one thing, it's a lie. And how do I
get from there to the next vital word? "Around the first of May I think it was. What they used to call May Day."
"Did they?" she says, light, indifferent, menacing. "That isn't a term I remember. I'm surprised you do. You ought to make an effort..." She
pauses. "To clear your mind of such..." She pauses again. "Echoes."
Now I feel cold, seeping over my skin like water. What she is doing is warning me.

DomesticatedZombie · 05/05/2022 22:37

Well, Shortpoet, we've got about 25 days left for that one to work!

Shortpoet · 05/05/2022 21:30

I was thinking about this recently when I met up with a friend who recently worked for a very woke organisation. We skirted round the subject for a good long while before realising we both thought the same. I thought that we needed a password!

This from a Handmaids Tale came to mind:

”It's a beautiful May day," Ofglen says. I feel rather than see her head turn towards me, waiting for a reply.
"Yes," I say. "Praise be," I add as an afterthought. Mayday used to be a distress signal, a long time ago, in one of those wars we studied in
high school. I kept getting them mixed up, but you could tell them apart by the airplanes if you paid attention. It was Luke who told me about mayday, though. Mayday, mayday, for pilots whose planes had been hit, and ships — was it ships too? — at sea. Maybe it was SOS for ships. I wish I could look it up. And it was something from Beethoven, for the beginning of the victory, in one of those wars.
Do you know what it came from? said Luke. Mayday?
No, I said. It's a strange word to use for that, isn't it?
Newspapers and coffee, on Sunday mornings, before she was born. There were still newspapers, then. We used to read them in bed. It's French, he said. From m'aidez.
Help me.”

—-

"Who told you?" I say. There's no one near, we can speak more freely, but out of habit we keep our voices low.
"The grapevine," she says. She pauses, looks sideways at me, I can sense the blur of white as her wings move. "There's a password," she says.
"A password?" I ask. "What for?"
"So you can tell," she says. "Who is and who isn't."
Although I can't see what use it is for me to know, I ask, "What is it then?"
"Mayday," she says. "I tried it on you once."
"Mayday," I repeat. I remember that day. M'aidez.
"Don't use it unless you have to," says Ofglen. "It isn't good for us to know about too many of the others, in the network. In case you get caught."

—-

Cheesecakeandwineinasuitcase · 05/05/2022 21:12

This reply has been deleted

Withdrawn at the user's request

Aren’t dinosaurs a sort of symbol? Specifically the t-Rex? I saw a t-Rex pendant on the Jo Malone website recently and am going to buy one

PrelateChuckles · 05/05/2022 21:10

Ooh, I love this sort of thing. I hope the other person is on here and notices!

I sort of know of someone who is a friend of a friend who might be on here, but haven't had the chance to properly speak to them for a very long time. Hope that changes sometime.

Useranon1 · 05/05/2022 20:20

I also bring up JK as my test the waters piece. Work in academic policy so couldn't use Tickell as I have to say his name all the time Grin

Swashbuckled · 05/05/2022 19:35

I used to be on another forum years ago, before it died. There was an ongoing thread in there called something like “I saw you…”.

Basically, people saying they thought they’d spotted a like minded traveller (if you like) and giving the circumstances so the other person could see themselves being spotted (if they were on the forum).

I do like a bit of MI5, but I was never spotted, despite checking 😊

JulesRimetStillGleaming · 05/05/2022 09:12

MumstedInadequate · 04/05/2022 19:46

I've come across a few in the wild. My favourite was my (retired nurse) sports colleague who asked if it was OK to come into the small changing room when i was in. I said yes, she replied 'we're all women, sorry cervix havers' with a huge eye roll. It was lovely.

I am still bafflrd by the anxiety huge swathes of people who have no idea about any of this.

Was chatting to DSIL the other day who is head of governors at her local school and it hasn't come up there yet. I mentioned something about name changes without parents permission and she tells she thought it was illegal, certainly her school had a policy they will only call the child whatever is on the formal registration form unless parents request a change. Even a nickname needs a formal request.

She has never heard of admittedly primary school children changing gender / name and bring affirmed.

It makes me question everything I've read on here tbh! Only momentarily, but I do feel I inhabit two parallel universe on this topic- the one which exists with MN and has links and evidence and robust discussion, and the one i see with my oen eyes outside my front door where trans people barely exist and noone suffers any adverse consequences. Its very odd.

In my immediate social circle, I know of three women who are now non-binary, another who is dressing up in male clothing and wearing a binder to do it; a distant family member by marriage is now identifying as a boy and I'm being criticised in a local feminist group by other women who think the few of us are openly gender critical are being mean. I live in one of the most rural parts of the UK so if gender ideology is here, it's everywhere.

MrsWateringcan · 05/05/2022 08:53

Sadly I've never had an encounter of this type in my woke profession. I've resorted to thinking that anyone without pronouns in their signature is in the same camp...clutching at straws but you never know!

Plus I noticed a couple of professional connections who follow JKR - surely a sign?!?

Pompomdogbowl · 05/05/2022 08:34

I wear a suffragette pin, never had anyone comment on it but I’d make someone argue to the death the reason it’s inappropriate.

Ereshkigalangcleg · 05/05/2022 08:27

They felt women were appropriating dinosaurs, and they wanted to reclaim them.

They would do this and have done this with any symbol women had. Because many of these people are petty, childish and like online trolling. They also have think it's a "win", like they do when they sabotage feminist hashtags.

teawamutu · 05/05/2022 08:27

JK Rowling is a good one. I've had a few 'ooo yes she's amazing isn't she' convos which ostensibly were about Lumos or Strike, accompanied by a raised eyebrow.

Ratonastick · 05/05/2022 06:49

I have a replica suffragette brooch that I wear a lot. If questioned by a youngling, I explain the history of suffragette jewellery and joke that one day I’ll be able to afford a real one. They know, but it’s very hard to challenge a senior woman about the history of women’s voting and democratic rights.
As for some of the older women at work, it’s like a bat signal. Ironically, we do most of our talking about it in the gender neutral khazi.

Link for anyone interested:
www.museumselection.co.uk/jewellery/suffragette-brooch/

PurgatoryOfPotholes · 05/05/2022 02:16

unwashedanddazed · 05/05/2022 01:24

On the subject of dinosaurs, anyone else noticed how many TRAs have a dinosaur in their Twitter handle? I've seen loads of them!

When they started using AHF in Twitter bios I thought they were being provocative but seeing the adoption of GCs' jokey response to Lammy's insult I've decided instead that they are just plain stupid.

They felt women were appropriating dinosaurs, and they wanted to reclaim them.

unwashedanddazed · 05/05/2022 01:24

On the subject of dinosaurs, anyone else noticed how many TRAs have a dinosaur in their Twitter handle? I've seen loads of them!

When they started using AHF in Twitter bios I thought they were being provocative but seeing the adoption of GCs' jokey response to Lammy's insult I've decided instead that they are just plain stupid.

CriticalCondition · 05/05/2022 00:36

My DH was seated next to a colleague's wife at a recent work jolly and said she seemed very clued up about 'the whole gender ID thing just like you'. I was so hoping to bump into her in the loos so we could do the equivalent of a secret handshake.

MrLueHasALovelyQuiff · 05/05/2022 00:10

I thought that my new user name would indicate which camp I am in, being an adult human female, following the Allison Bailey employment tribunal!