I'm trans so I've never used the school toilets- BBC artical pro gender neutral toilets

It's not at all OK to "just use the disabled toilets". I keep seeing this. They're for disabled people, and that's it.

My schoolchild needs toilets with a door gap at the bottom for safety (like normal girls toilets). This is in case she has a seizure and collapses so someone will see her.
Mixed sexed toilets (full length door) and disabled toilets don’t work for her. Just before a seizure she gets a bit spaced out so possibly wouldn’t pull an emergency cord.

This is in your new build school, specifically thought out with disability in mind by the sound of it. Most schools are not like this at all. This would perhaps work there, especially as the children don’t change for PE. However, most schools will have fewer accessible loos and most have reverted back to uniform all day and changing for PE.

These spaces were hard won and a reasonable adjustment for disabled people and have been designated to those with a specific need. It could also be used by a girl with a heavy period needing to change and clean herself up for example. A school should not be advocating for them to be used for anyone, who wants just because they’re ‘accessible’ rather than for exclusive disabled use. The big wheelchair sign on the door should be hint enough.

I am a woman and a blue badge holder. Protected characteristics should mean something.

Yes I do mean that, apologies. When I wrote "fundraising for top surgery", I used that phrase because that's how it's used in that context i.e. I was referring to the kinds of things people do and say in this ideology (likewise I don't actually think a gender coming out party really involves "coming out"). But you are right it needs to be said.

RoseLunarPink, by “top surgery” do you mean bilateral mastectomies - to remove healthy breasts from young women, preventing them ever being able to breast feed a future child? Because I think coy euphemisms are extremely harmful. Let’s use the correct medical term for what is in fact major surgery.

However aggressive they are they still can be seriously hurt by colliding with a boy. No one intends to hurt anyone when they tackle but it's nothing but sheer stupidity to have a female student play rugby with boys. And it's luck that child hasn't been hurt.

Have you informed your insurance providers that you have mixed sex rugby?

I was at a meeting earlier this week where parents were complaining about the gender neutral toilets provided at our local secondary school in order to be more inclusive ( I have no children if that age) and how girls at the school were avoiding using the toilets at school because of the behaviour of the boys also using the toilets ( just for clarity biological girls complaining about biological boys no trans issues involved) meaning girls not having access to toilets of their own choice. The trans/ questioning kids actually use the disabled toilets. I don’t see the girls being featured on the BBC news though.

*Felix, for example, said he can feel upset when listening to boys' voices in his class because they sound different to his own."

Many kids around this age like a self-indulgent, self-pitying whine. It's normal as an adolescent to find things difficult and awkward, to feel like no one understands you, the world is out to get you, your parents are idiots and no one has suffered like you do. I have one of these myself, and I also was one.

It's the job of parents, adults and teachers to balance listening and caring - and of course taking upsetting problems seriously - with encouraging independence, empathy with others and teaching 13yos that they're not the centre of the universe. But at the moment, they just have to identify as trans and everything they say is gospel and no one is allowed to challenge any of it.

It is REALLY not good for them!

That is the horrifying thing.

Whichever school it is, they are not safeguarding the teenage boys being forced to play rugby with a young female.

That child’s feelings about their gender identity are not more important than the boys’ right to know the sex of the people they’re being asked to learn to tackle in PE.

It could be your school for all you know

It's a huge challenge for schools, who can't get anything right. Until very recently Stonewall was the only advice that mattered and whilst that is slowly unravelling, inclusion is still a very big driver, much more so than women's rights, despite education being being basically run by women.

In my school 5/6 SLT are women, but the rights of people to live as they wish, regardless of the effect on others is very much the priority. TBH it's only on MN I hear these arguments at all. I'm around professional women every day and "what is a woman" is just not on the agenda.

If it's anything like dd's school, nobody can go for a wee. The toilets are either vandalised, locked or full of people vaping.

Actually telling the boys that there is a biological female on the pitch would be a reasonable thing to do. They deserve to know.

not even just because of the risk of injury. It’s a contact sport and there will be places they don’t want to accidentally come into contact with on a female body.

If my Y8 son was in this situation, I’d be complaining to the school. It’s not ok. PE should be segregated by sex or not segregated at all (we did mixed sex PE all through school - which means the whole thing is approached differently to single sex groups). It shouldn’t be about your ‘gender identity’.

I agree here. The bit about feeling bad hearing boys’ voices is absolutely in expectations management territory.

Felix sounds like a typical high maintenance teenager, why are grown ups indulging so much?

"Mum, I want to tie my shoe laces together!"
"I don't think that's a good idea, darling."
"You don't understand!!!"
<stomps off>

Later, a distant wail:
"I can't walk."
"Uh-uh..."
"Can you carry me?"
....

(At least that's what so much of this sounds like to me.)

Your students at 13 play a contact sport on a muddy playing field with no post game hygiene standards?
Poor teachers and cleaning staff.

If that’s the case, then there’s a clear user need for more accessible toilets.

As I said, loads of safeguarding and risk assessment around this.

Accessible toilets in schools (or usually anywhere else actually) aren't designated for disabled use only. They're simply spaces that are more accessible for those who need extra or different facilities, but they're available for anyone.

In our newly built school (100 students) we have 16 toilets and 4 of them are accessible. We currently have no staff or students who need one because of a disability. I've never met a child with autism who feels they need to use an accessible toilet, although they're free to if they wish.

Oh my goodness, no to every option. 🙈🙈🙈 Felix sounds like a typical high maintenance teenager, why are grown ups indulging so much?

@WoodenClock
I think it a slippery slope for a school to allow use of accessible toilets. Perhaps today there is no one needing a disabled toilet. But what about the future? And what about children with additional needs? Some people with autism have blue badges for example. Before long, these facilities could be jammed up with kids, who don’t want to use single sex spaces. Once the facilities have been repurposed, it is more difficult to roll back.

@WoodenClock a biological female is playing rugby with biological males and they don't know? The chance of an injury seems pretty concerning to me!

I just read that again. The boys are being "put in a awkward position of potentially harming a female student". Surely they shouldn't be harming anyone.

FWIW this chid is probably the most aggressive one we have. Clearly very distress ed.

They are not doing children any favours at all in pretending that they can be the opposite sex.

And believe me, there is a whole ton of safeguarding around this child. It's practically a FT job in itself.

Quote from the article: "Felix, for example, said he can feel upset when listening to boys' voices in his class because they sound different to his own."

I'm finding it hard to have sympathy - how on earth do they cope in the world? There's lots of males with male voices around, they're bloomin' everywhere!