Slater is not trans, but has this to say on her own feelings about 'gender'
twitter.com/lornaslater/status/1270956807176028165
As an autistic person (former girl) who has struggled with gender issues, I can assure you that there is a world of difference between being autistic and struggling with gender issues and being trans. Although, it would have been a comfort to me as a child to be able to discuss
and explore these matters, rather than just being told I was doing 'girl' wrong. If there was no stigma around being trans, we could have had those kind of conversations. If we allowed kids to express who they are without fear, we could get rid of the stigma. #TransAlly
As an autistic person I've leaned to 'perform' to conform and that includes having to 'perform' my gender so as to help make other people more comfortable. That is what forcing gender conformance on autistic children is. Giving us one more thing we have to do to make you feel OK.
The ironic thing here is that neurotypical people are also performing gender, but because they do it based on unconscious cue that they pick up, they aren't conscious of doing it. Autistic people don't pick up these cues, we have to consciously decide how to
perform our gender. Not surprising then that autistic people are more likely to challenge gender assumptions; we literally have to think about it in a way that neurotypical people don't. Neurotypical people think they just 'are' their gender.