He/They

I always think they must actually have so little self confidence in who they are that they put on an act to make themselves seem quirky and different.

Kind of expect it from teens but when it's 30 year olds doing it, it just makes them look a bit sad.

napody “Who’s they, the cat’s birthing person?”!
I love that!

The singer Halsey is she/they which most people would take to mean that someone is fine with either female or plural pronouns but great offense was taken when a magazine just referred to her using female pronouns, she thinks its disrepectful if you don't use a mix which I think most people would realise renders the point of pronouns moot

www.out.com/celebs/2021/7/21/halsey-claps-back-magazine-misgendered-them

"Halsey uses she/they pronouns, and usually, when someone says they use multiple pronouns, that means they want to be referred to by both of them. With most people who do, the best practice is to mix what pronouns you use, unless the person says they only want one pronoun to be used at the time."

As well as being absurd, this reveals how utterly self-centred this ideology is. Do they/he not consider that perhaps other people have their own shit going on in their lives, like debts and bills and relationships and illness and god knows what else but somehow we are all meant to hold back some headspace in amongst all the daily crap of real life to check what pronouns so and so is using today? Do they value our time and emotional energy so little? (I know the answer)

This picture is painted of non-trans people as having trouble-free lives full of joy in comparison to the untold issues we are told are the norm in the trans world. Where is the sympathy the other way? Grr, sorry to rant but am out of cares to give at this point.

I know of a few she/they pronoun signallers at work. I understand it as people who recognise being natal females, but not as having a binary woman gender identity. And are happy to be referred to with either she/her pronouns or they/them pronouns or a mixture of them all.

I'm a natal female and am GC so don't recognise a woman gender identity. I don't give instructions on what pronouns people should use about me in my presence or not. It's not the most interesting or important thing about me. I'll try and use other people's preferred pronouns if they tell me them.

There is be 'whose' , of course, if 'who's'. Lousy autocorrect.

So it can vary day to day? This is bloody ridiculous, I'm sorry.

Have she considered the possibility they is taking the piss?

-- Gave we a chuckle, anyway, where them read who's description, OP ... If thou knowest when it mean!

@waterlego

How tedious for them all. The bracelet wearer sounds very controlling.

My older teen DC has a friend at school who is female but has given themselves a male name and likes he/they pronouns, depending on how they identify on a particular day. I asked DC how one was supposed to know which ones to use, and apparently the child wears a bracelet of a particular colour to signify the pronoun du jour. They all seem more or less willing to go along with it but I see it as more than a little self-obsessed.

Yes, there is a discontinuity with this. He/him and she/her are unnecessary, they're just two different parts of speech, it's just for emphasis I think, and because just putting "he" wouldn't be as noticeable.

Whereas if you say "He/they" IME that generally means they are OK with either he/him or they/them, though in some cases it might mean they want you to use both as a PP described.

A different he/they I know spells out that either he or they is acceptable.

I've seen he/they before. It reminds me a bit if the Kinsey Scale, but for gender instead of sexual orientation.

I don't really believe in gender (my personality just doesn't fit into narrow pink/blue boxes, and I don't look at other people through gender lenses), but I guess if someone does believe in that stuff, adding more nuances to it is a form of progress (I guess he/they is a slightly more androgynous persona compared to a manly man, but still somewhat more masculine than feminine. Whatever that means)

Nothing wrong in term of "understanding better your own internal sense of self". But expecting other people to perform some sort of social dance around it is ridiculous. No one fucking cares how fucking pink or blue your gender aura is today, mate!

And does it actually work as an either/or scenario?

He/him
She/her
They/them

Admittedly I’m not a linguist, but aren’t all of the above list to do with the tense and circumstance in which you are using the pronoun? Rather than being a choice between two different ‘identities’.

They can all fuck off now. I’ve had enough

I was introduced to the person in a CC'd email in which the person introducing us used "they". I checked on Twitter and the person included they/them in profile but then made a change and announced he/they instead (without changing name or appearance). I only use they, never he but of course it's unlikely they'd ever know as it's in perfunctory emails to other people about who's sending what when and so on. But in my industry I have to tread carefully.

Well I know three he/theys, and I wfh and don't move in woke circles. I think it is common at the moment (but I predict will be embarrassing and quickly shaken off by most, when society finally moves on from this mad moment).

Yes, self-absorbed bollocks and controlling, for a great many of these people. And not surprising is it. We all get told if someone randomly announces they "have" special pronouns we all have to use them – it's catnip for controlling, manipulative people.

I work with a female "he/they" - remotely thank goodness or he/they might notice my eyeballs rolling out of my head - female appearance, female (and very feminine) name, requires he/they pronouns, it's just daft. It's obviously not dysphoria about being female or feminine. And I'm pissed off that I'm meant to find it impressive that he/they wants to identify out of womanhood and push people around into the bargain.