YogabirthUK cancel event after Freddy McConnell flounce

What did they study at uni?

I don’t know how that relationship would be defined.

Stnnng and Brv

Freddy appeared to have been g*d by some people Freddy met at university in Scotland
Scuse me being dim but I don't know what the g word is here...

Is Freddie gay? Because that's another thing for the children to deal with, isn't it? (I'm not in any way prejudiced BTW, but recognize that there is still lots of prejudice out there, just to clarify)

I think Freddy has written a children’s book to help him explain the situation to his children. But I can’t remember the details.

I wonder about the administrative stuff too. SJ is the same age as my DD, so would normally be due to start school this year. The council keep tabs on DD (and the other children) and asked her nursery to remind me to complete her school application (BTW, I hadn’t forgotten, I was in the process of moving house, and hoping to use our new address).

Perhaps there is an entry on the register of births for SJ, but no certificate was printed and given to Freddy?

I imagine the problems will start to come as the children grow. All of this administrative stuff is really by the by.

The actual issue is how a child is going to feel when they discover their father is female, when they start to ask what is going on, when trust and belief and so on come into play. What is that going to do to the relationship? How is the child going to feel? Has anyone involved given this any consideration, or is it all just about satisfying Freddy's compulsions?

Having a baby's just the beginning, really.

Sorry, fat fingers!
Meant to say: in the article linked above by nitronine

Also interesting what FM thinks accurate means.

f doesn’t acknowledge the birth cert then. Otherwise how will this kid get jabs, register for a doctor, have child benefit laid, register for a nursery or school, travel…

Someone is just saying why they want to be true.

It's interesting that FM seems to say that their first child doesn't have a birth certificate and yet in the a

"When his child received a birth certificate, McConnell was listed as “mother” because he gave birth, though his sex is legally male. He started on the lengthy process of filing a lawsuit to have that changed.

“Someone's birth certificate is not the be-all and end-all. It's not that I think that the birth certificate is what defines who I am, or my relationship to my child at all,” he says. “Obviously, all the trans men out there that have incorrect birth certificates doesn't change who they are, but if we live in a society that puts significance in these pieces of paper, then it has to be accurate.”"

I think it likely that children who have effecting been gaslit fro birth, will grow up believing that F is their dad.

The wheels may wobble a bit when they get to biology class at school, returning home with the idea that day, SJ, a boy, will grow into a man and be able to have a 'baby in his tummy' and be a dad that way.

This can easily be 'corrected' is biological reality is acknowledge and there is an admission that sex and gender identity are two different things. I think it's possible that this will be the conclusion F comes to as a parent in that situation.

There are trans people who recognise their sex, I'm not sure which way F would go on this. So far, from all social media, the documentary, the involvement in advising NHS trusts etc, I'm not sure that will be possible, but with kids you tend to tell the the truth in an age-appropriate way.

SJ cannot give birth to a child and it wouldn't Be Kind to let that be an idea that is sustained into the teenage years.

(Unless by then womb implants are a routine operation.)

How will someone with what we can assume Freddy’s beliefs are, describe their own pregnancy? The contribution of their own egg? What will the conversation be when their kids start school and ask why they don’t have a mum? Who gave birth to them? It’s a huge ask for a child to accept that a parent was born of one sex but now prefers to be known as another.
But saying you actually are now of a different sex is completely different to that. Unless you avoid that question by saying you’ve always been a man and denying your female history completely? Or saying you were ‘born in the wrong body’?

Accepting any of those, would require the child to suspend facts and reality for the parent’s sake or parental happiness. Not accepting the parent’s narrative will come at personal cost to the child. There will be a lot of questions that the child presumably couldn’t comfortably ask for fear of upsetting the parent. All of us tend to get upset about secrets kept in families. We all find cognitive dissonance very difficult.

That sets a precedent doesn't it?

Yes it does. And a very worrying one. It says that people with certain beliefs and agendas can bypass the normal legal requirement to register the birth of a child if they disagree with some aspect of the process.

I'll have to look it up but I'm pretty sure the usual passport application was bypassed and approved by the judge - I guess it could be argued under human rights (freedom of movement/discrimination.)

That sets a precedent doesn't it? Would F need to go to court to do the same for the second child?

It will be interesting to see how the court case with the European court of human rights progresses.

I do appreciate that it must be very stressful on top of what I imagine to be a very busy life with little income and a newborn but it isn't something imposed on F, but sought out.

Well of course, he might face some tough questions that there's no logical answer for in that case.

I just don’t understand what Freddy is aiming for. Is this a huge vanity project?

His mental state must be very fragile. I do think people are kind to him because he seems very vulnerable.

Did you see Freddy's seahorse film? Freddy appeared to have been g***d by some people Freddy met at university in Scotland (a long way from Freddy's family in the south of England).

I don't know who is behind this but I suspect the end game is for male people to be named as 'mother' on a birth certificate. Because female people are only ever a distraction and diversion in this male rights movement.

I thought the same but it was ruled by the judge that a passport would be issued.

Without a birth certificate? But it's a legal requirement to register a birth. Why was Freddy not ordered to register the birth and fined for late registration?

Born slightly premature, small but bigger than they thought.

Could T have been the cause or related to a small placenta?

If he has a passport, he has a birth certificate.

I thought the same but it was ruled by the judge that a passport would be issued.

Bloody expensive way of getting passport, by circumventing the system through the courts. Maybe the lawyers worked pro-bono - still applying the usual way would have been cheaper once you consider the train tickets to get to court hearings etc.

I'm inclined to agree that it's a vanity project and baby two is part of that. Both conceived with the same sperm donor, will they know their genetic father exists if their whole lives they are told their mother is actually their father?

Yes, but most parents learn very early on that it isn't kind to give in to your child's every whim. You have to learn to say no and mean it. As your child grows up, it becomes clear some are not as mentally strong and resilient as others. Your job then is not to wrap that child in cotton wool and assist them in avoiding everything they fear, or nod along to every deluded thought they have. Terrifying as it is, your job is to be there to support them while they do their best to cope, and to look after them if they have a setback. Also, to hold firm about what's true and real and immovable.

We would all recognise that a parent who colluded with a child with an eating disorder was failing in their basic duty of care. The kind thing there, no matter what the child says at the time, is to get them professional help.

You can’t dick about with hormones. Even a slight fluctuation naturally can cause all sorts of conditions and affect fertility we know that. I can’t begin the imagine the implications of taking a male hormone for so long before becoming pregnant or even during pregnancy.

It will pass to the child. Our body isn’t designed for this artificial state of flux. As pp mentioned. Medication for various problems like acne, can’t be given to girls or women incase they become pregnant for some time after they have taken the medication because it’s known to cause birth defects.

I just don’t understand what Freddy is aiming for. Is this a huge vanity project?

His mental state must be very fragile. I do think people are kind to him because he seems very vulnerable.

Yep it's bizarre isn't it?
The world seems to "own" a pregnant woman with all the rules and regulations we follow.
Don't eat soft cheeses, don't eat nuts, no alcohol, no tuna fish, absolutely don't smoke, no flying after X weeks, no pate', don't have hot baths, don't lie on your back for too long, no aggressive sports, no medications that are not approved by your doctor, the list is endless.

If you were to smoke or drink whilst visibly pregnant in public, you would certainly get some looks and maybe even comments.

But......utter the magic words "trans" and you can pump your body full of God knows what (testosterone if your are a FTM, (and also with regards to the health of a baby post-birth, Domperidone if you are a MTF trying to use a "breastfeeding" lactation stimulation protocol).

It's almost as if the needs of the trans parent massively outweigh the needs and safety of the foetus!
Who'd have thought it?

Pregnant women can’t take over the counter cold medicine because there’s not enough research on it, but pregnant men can take testosterone? I had waiters sitting at the table googling safe cheese for me (not at my request!) when I was pregnant.

I’m sensing law suits.

I’m also increasingly concerned for F.